Thursday Funnies

WILL

Wrong Plane This should have been a DC 8 not a DC 3. And that is an awfully slow way to travel, the WW II era DC3 is not renowned for its speed.... Just a month or so ago, Andres was touring around as Snr CS WUS. Wonder if his coverage on the fringes of the internet got him in trouble?   The greatest push in the last 2500 years Seems just a bit overhyped... Makes you wonder what the push was back in Mesopotamia in 600BC The event went on for 8 hours... Bet none of these photos were taken when it ended.   This is an ideal org? They can list everyone who is … [Read more...]

Miscavige Media Madness

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  A few days ago I posted something about David Miscavige's response to the Tampa Bay Times -- Miscavige Media Handling. And now this. An article published in Business Insider yesterday continuing the discussion about John Oliver's brilliant piece on televangelists and tax exemption. (And, in case you missed it, Oliver took another jab at scientology in his show last Sunday). What is remarkable here is not the article itself. It contains virtually no new news other than an inaccurate statement from Anthony Ole, the president of Trinity Foundation where he seems to think … [Read more...]

Finally, Scrooge Subsidizes Valley Idle Org

scrooge

It's just too damned embarrassing. Even though they STILL haven't made their "ballpark figure" to able allowed to get started on getting a final figure for construction, it seems Uncle Scrooge McDuck is going to chip in the last few million and get them rolling. (Though it could be that this is just another of their numerous false promises about how close they are to being done....) But it seems unlikely because this is the pattern happening around the world now.  They will keep squeezing the local orgs for everything they can get out of them, but in the interim, Scrooge has opened … [Read more...]

Scientology Internet Fail

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Try as they might, scientology is incapable of accomplishing any positive results on the internet. Miscavige shows "stats" at his events like "people look up scientology every 1.63 seconds" or "we have 627Xed the reach for our programs on the internet" or other completely meaningless statements. All the while they continue to raise money for the "KCET studios" because this facility will allow scientology to "take over the internet." Miscavige has spent a LOT of money to create a video driven website at scientology.org. And probably more money paying than that to click farms in India and … [Read more...]

Purif Promises

PURIF

Really? The Purif is going to prevent blood brain disorders? Skin cancer? Reproductive problems? They are actually claiming the the Purif is the "solution" -- no, the only solution to the bisphenol you accumulate from drinking for plastic water bottles that can cause cancer? And the kidney/liver damage you are suffering from associating with Mr. Clean. This is based on NOTHING. But promoted as truth. Surely there is some prohibition against making these sort of fraudulent assertions? When challenged on it, scientology claims this is a "spiritual" program. When they think nobody is … [Read more...]

Miscavige Media Handling

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    I have been  noting for some time now the strident, arrogant and often bizarre responses to the media that emanate from David "Karin Pouw" Miscavige. And here is the latest response to a small piece in the Tampa Bay Times. Interesting he is so infuriated about the media mentioning that a politician and his wife are at the Ft. Harrison. Why? Well, the simple answer is that being associated with scientology is such a terrible stain on you, that Miscavige feels the need to "attack, never defend" the reporter who made note of these facts. How strange. It's a … [Read more...]

Thursday Funnies

AC - Copy

We don't have toilet paper But we DO have air conditioning. So, come on down and let's make a deal...     The best parking We don't have toilet paper either. But we absolutely have the BEST parking. And it's the ONLY way Denver org can make any income and there isn't much time left in the season before the barren Broncos/Avalanche/Nuggets season sets in. From: Bruno Bergeron To: Subject: Whoop! Whoop! Is that the best title for an email or what? If you're reading this right now then say YES! lol OK we are now more than half way through the Rockies season so … [Read more...]

It’s The Old Buy A Building Trick

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After a lean period in the ideal world, things are hopping again. Rabbits are being pulled out of the hat once more to prove that the massive international expansion that COP keeps talking about is real. They are now promoting "5 ideal org in 4 months" and "We are opening an ideal org every month for the rest of the year and have just opened Tokyo and Bogota then it will be Harlem, Milano and Atlanta." Of course, this is typical scientology math. If they open these 5 ideal orgs by the end of this year, it will be 5 in 6 months, not 5 in 4. Bogota was opened in July. But what's a little … [Read more...]

GAG Me

SHEEPLE

I have assumed since the release of GAT II in November 2013 that it meant that all previous auditor training was no longer valid. Though of course, at the outset, this was never stated. Might have the natives to get restless. Those natives are pretty docile, fed on a constant diet of lies and half-truths to turn them into sheeple. The trick is to keep them thinking that the next big thing has just been given to them and that this "breakthrough" will cure all the previous failures to deliver what was promised. So, it is nice to finally see it in writing -- direct from COP … [Read more...]

Miami Ballpark Completion (not really)…

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Hooray, Miami finally completed their ballpark. I understand from watching Jon Oliver's show that it has fishtanks in the walls behind homeplate (something to do with the team being the Marlins apparently). Oh, my error. Apparently this has something to do with ideal orgs. And it seems, in spite of the headline, they didn't actually complete raising the "ballpark figure" -- a euphemism for some interim step they can announce as a "completion" -- because after a LOOONG time "Mighty Miami" is still not capable of getting and completing an ideal org building. In fact, they constantly tout … [Read more...]

OMG. They Didn’t!

OT-CX-CS

Yes, of course they did. The Moneywinds is now promoting they have an "OT VIII, IX and X C/S." Love to go to one of those briefings and get the full rundown from Bob on how he C/Ses OT IX and X.... Of course, they will say ANYTHING to try and get people to show up for these briefings. And ANYTHING to persuade the sheeple that they should go on hoping. That there is the elusive "spiritual eternity" just over the horizon, so long as you remain a believer. Scientology -- after deriding it so heavily in other religions -- has assumed the old religious pitch. It's just their heaven is not … [Read more...]

Nashville “Ideal” Org

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Here is what an ideal org REALLY is. Tony Ortega recently posted some photos and a report from someone in Nashville. Who knows over what period these completions have happened. Probably months to accumulate this feeble page. Just take a gander at the details. John and Jennifer Pantermuehl are OT 7's (Jenna Miscavige Hill's aunt and uncle on her mother's side) who completed the SRD. The entirety of the "Academy" completions is two STUDENT HAT courses. Not a single auditor training course. Not a single Grade Chart auditing completion other than the aforementioned … [Read more...]