Shhhhh…. Don’t Breathe A Word


Something very amusing is happening in the bubble.

Either they are so paranoid, they are sending out invitations to the “Grand Opening” and “ribbon cuttings” in LA and telling people “not to forward this email” “for obvious reasons,”


They are so paranoid, they are sending out fake emails to certain people to try and find the “leak” hoping they will then be published and the “leak” will be uncovered, but meanwhile creating mass confusion within the KoolAid community.

Either way, the magnificent Cause Over All Life, Matter, Energy, Space And Time OT’s, led by Dear Leader, the Greatest Of All Big Beings are demonstrating they are completely effect of the tiny handful of bitter defrocked unemployed lying natterers on the fringes of the internet.

Now, how could this mightiest of mighty organizations, expanding at unprecedented exponential rates under the brilliant leadership of the greatest man in the history of all living creatures (and robots), be so at effect of such a small collection of lying nobodies?  It just doesn’t seem possible.

Yet, here is the living proof…

Begin forwarded message from: 

Date: Mon, 17 Feb 2014 

From: pat parodi <>

Subject: Monday Note and Quote


Day after day, week in and week out, the world of Scientology continues to change, to grow, to expand. Have you been seeing the ads on television? They are so amazing, so contemporary and beautifully done! And the results, literally tens of thousands of visits to the website within hours of its showing at the Super Bowl Then there are the absolutely stupendous products coming out of Flag; Solo NOTs completions, Clears, L’s completions and of course, Super Power and Cause Resurgence Rundown completions! A seemingly endless parade of theta, marching out the doors of our new cathedral. We really are making the true Jedi Knights here in Scientology!

I have been mentioning to you that the PAC Base is nearing the end of its “retro-fitting” and this is indeed the case. Yesterday, Mr. Miscavage, in Copenhagen, Denmark, did the ribbon cutting ceremony for the newly renovated and re-opened European Advanced Org/Saint Hill there. I understand that this Sea Org Base, which has delivered the OT Levels to Europe for many decades has been beautifully touched up, is aglow with theta and stands with welcome arms to all of Europe to come in, go Clear and OT and get trained! 

With the above news just in, I can also tell you that the dates for the Pacifica Sea Org Base and the Hollywood Test Center grand openings was also announced by Mr. Miscavage in his ribbon-cutting speech yesterday in Copenhagen’s grand opening. I will provide you the specifics below but PLEASE, do not forward this email to others, it is for you only. Of course, you can tell others about the dates but we don’t want it going out on broad, “bulk” email lines; you can understand why, right?

Friday, February 28 at 6:30, the grand opening of the Hollywood Test Center will be held. Parking is at a premium in this area, I suggest you park in the LA Org parking lot and take one of the buses that will be transporting public to the Test Center location -way easier. And, I would say to try to arrive at 5pm as we are expecting a lot of attendees! The Test Center is on the corner of Hollywood Blvd and Highland. After the dedication speeches and ribbon cutting ceremony by Mr. Miscavage, you will be toured through the Test Center itself and can hang out, socialize and connect up with other Scientologists. Do plan on attending, this is the beginning of a whole new era of dissemination for PAC and CCI-think about it!

Saturday, March 1 at 6:00, the grand opening of the Pacifica Sea Org Base (the new AOLA and ASHO buildings) will be done. Try to get there early, 5pm, there will be a lot of other Scientologists there! After the dedication speeches, Mr. Miscavage will do the ribbon cutting and then the doors of AOLA and ASHO will be opened for tours of the newly re-done AO and Saint Hill Organizations in Los Angeles! These are larger building so I suggest wearing comfortable shoes so you can enjoy ALL the touring you will do!

Whether you live in Los Angeles or not, plan on being at both these colossal grand openings; come see LRH’s vision of an Ideal Sea Org Base in Los Angeles become a fact! Reflecting the GAT II and Scientology’s bright future, your attendance at the Test Center grand opening and at PAC the following day is essential. Like the grand opening of the Delivery Building at Flag in November of last year, this is an epic moment on our religion’s track so be a part of it, be a group member, show your support and enthusiasm and be there!

And finally (sorry this is a longer Note and Quote) I leave you with a very inspiring quote I received from the Sacramento Org. Always, LRH strikes at the heart of the matter, making his point with blazing letters of fire! This is no exception and perhaps is even more inspiring as it is so direct. I hope that you can become a “Companion of Truth”. Honesty, wisdom, beauty, freedom-all these, truth allows to rise and to shine in the sun! Enjoy the warmth once again, my friends!

Have a fantastic week, plan on attending the grand openings and please, pass on your own recommendation to others that they use my services, we now have so much to offer a being, he need only reach.

Much love,


Subject: Questions about the PAC Grand Openings?

Hi Xxxxx,

If you have any questions about the upcoming Grand Openings for ASHO, AOLA and the Test Center, please call the Flag WUS Office at (323) 953-3230. We will not be sending out mass emails about this.

Hope to see you there!!!


Jedi Knights?

The result of the superlative ads are people completing the running program in the cathedral?

A seemingly endless parade of theta, marching out the doors of our new cathedral?

PLEASE, do not forward this email to others, it is for you only. Of course, you can tell others about the dates but we don’t want it going out on broad, “bulk” email lines; you can understand why, right?

colossal grand openings?

LRH’s vision of an Ideal Sea Org Base in Los Angeles?

Reflecting the GAT II and Scientology’s bright future, your attendance at the Test Center grand opening and at PAC the following day is essential.

A “Companion of Truth”?? 

Wowee zowee.


  1. Hallie Jane says

    All I can say is Pat is in nah nah land. I object to the term “defrocked”. I dress very spiffy and my frocks are super cute.

  2. Angela says

    Lol…”endless parade of [parishioners] marching out the doors…” I “can understand why”…RIGHT!

  3. Mat Pesch says

    “Big Blue” was renovated and had its grand opening in 1978. Since then it has had many re-openings, won many Birthday Games, gone “Saint Hill Size”, is now “Ideal”,(whatever that is) and 36 years later IT IS STILL THE SAME SIZE OR SMALLER. What would happen if they had to pay taxes and pay their staff like a normal organization, not to mention stop begging?

    • Mat Pesch says

      Oh ya – don’t forget that they have taken in about $100 million in advanced donations that they have already spent and still owe delivery on. COB is going to cut yet another ribbon at the complex – WOW!
      The guy doesn’t qualify to run a coffee shop. He should either go back to the 10th grade or get a job packing fudge with Cruise.

  4. Jose Chung says

    Pat Parody is delusional. Excuse me.

    So the SECRET to life is redecorate your dwelling.
    Some new furniture,a coat of paint, new rugs,and bathroom fixtures.
    Who would have guessed.

  5. edge says

    Hey Mike,

    This was linked over in a comment at The Bunker, but it has also gone viral at reddit and other threads. It’s a reply an Amazon shopper got over leaving a negative review (the horror!) of some stuff a Kool-Aid drinker (Hannah’s Attic and Place) was selling.

    They’re angry. REAL ANGRY.

    • KFrancis says

      Thank you for this link Edge. I hope everybody takes a minute and reads this email.

      I just get more and more incredible what people will do and say in the name of The Church of Scientology…..David Miscavige’s creation.

      The ARC triangle is long gone and has been replaced by threats, force and intimidation.

      • Cindy says

        Wow, I was shocked at that letter from your link. The threats and intimidation in it when they were the ones with the overt product, are just mind boggling. That person at Hannah’s whatever is definitely in DM’s valence and dramatizing what he has done with his staff. Only in the real world, people don’t put up with that. I hope the person writes another bad review and publishes that letter as proof of how unprofessional this company is. And the fact that she said she is connected to the Church of Scn loses her brownie points in the real world too. If DM saw the horribly out ARC and bullying letter she sent and that she linked it to the church, he would distance himself from her big time and say that she wasn’t a member of our church and that he doesn’t know her etc. I hope Amazong kicks this company off of its site. No company should threaten someone that they will make their life miserable if they don’t take down a bad review. I hope the reviewer/customer stood up to him and didn’t take it down. I hope instead he writes another bad review and shows the letter as an example of their threats and bullying. Davie may get away with that kind of behavior at Int and in the SO, but it doesn’t fly in the real world.

  6. Ms.P says

    “Of course, you can tell others about the dates but we don’t want it going out on broad, “bulk” email lines; you can understand why, right?”

    No, Pat Parodi, I don’t understand why. Is there some problem? Some communication I’m missing? Really, I can’t forward this to my friends. You see I’ve been on lines for years now and ONLY read Scientology print and magazines and follow all the rules about never ever reading anything on the Internet or any blog, newspapers, magazines, etc. So can you explain what you’re referring to please.

  7. Bonnie Kittelson says

    Pat Parodi is a nutcase. I knew him in the 80s as an FSM in L.A. He had asked me to partner with him in his FSM group, but when someone hit my parked car in front of his apartment he said he “took it as a sign that we should not work together”. I was in awe that someone could be so goofy, stupid and irrationnal that I decided he was right and never looked back. And, Mike, I laughed out loud at your perfect description of we who shall not be named: i.e, “the tiny handful of bitter defrocked unemployed lying natterers on the fringe of the internet.”

    • KFrancis says

      “”someone hit my parked car”

      This sounds like Pat Parody alright. He used to walk the halls (still does) of AOLA like he had been anointed or ordained by some high power
      As a Scientologist couldn’t he have taken a moment and considered that your car was hit because of drugged driver, an illiterate driver, an abberated driver or a criminal on the run? In other words all the categories of people the church knows exist and say they want to help? Seems like an incident like this would have redoubled his purpose to expand his FSM group and help folks.

      Sorry to hear Bonnie that you were instead immediately classified as a dirty little PTS with out-ethics situations that needed to be handled before you could hang with Pat…..what a dweeb.

      • Bonnie Kittelson says

        Thanks, K. It was actually in the 1970s and so he has been an asshole for a very long time. He most likely had/has no training and doesn’t understand PTS tech anyway. As a Class 6 myself (which, ironically drew him to me in the first place) I immediately realized being connected to him would be my undoing. And, by the way, his street was very narrow and it wouldn’t take much to hit a parked car due to limited space. When I read his letter I couldn’t believe the personallity lobotomy he’d undergone, as he was not such a rah-rah effusive coward as he now is. He was always a coward, just not an effusive one. LOL

  8. Good Old Boy=GOB says

    This is the public line? Wow blackheart’s world is not fun.
    Listen to Gladys Knight’s song Midnight train to Georgia and substitute Gladys for sheeple
    and the guy she is singing about as Blackheart. It’s great!

  9. WhiteStar says

    feeding tainted info into the pipeline to see where it emerges.

    it only means more declares and defections.

    • Cooper Kessel says

      AKA… pouring shit down a rat hole to see what emerges. Wait a minute, the cult has it backwards, they are putting a rat down a shithole…………some things never change!

  10. Cooper Kessel says

    Yo Dave,
    I was thinkin again, dangerous I know but anyway, do you think it would be a good idea to check the IAS cards of those fine folks getting on the bus at Pac for a ride over to the test center? I mean, what with all the heightened security around these emails it would seem appropriate to check those guys getting on the bus.

    What if a couple of those damn defrocked apostates got on the bus and then you didn’t check em at the test center? They might even mock YOU during YOUR ceremony. Anyways, just wanting to be sure YOUR event was purrrrrfectly ideal.

    I’ll see you there ……………. with enthusiasm!

  11. Aquamarine says

    What was that LRH datum? Something like, “In all the broad universe, there is no other hope for Man..”

    Uh, yeah, but at the same time, PLEASE don’t forward this email to anyone, and, I mean, you know why, don’t you?

    LOL, what a mind-fuck!

    I’m still processing this, guys.

  12. Madora P says

    Random comments:

    – Jeezus, Pat Parodi is still shilling??? Most people leave any cult, one way or another. How can he not wonder where everyone has gone over the years?
    – Protest scheduled for 6:30 on 2/28. Don’t be late. Bring a clever protest sign. My favorite is “WHAT IF THE ENTHETA IS TRUE??”
    – I caught a news report last night on the totalistic regime of North Korea where they run prison camps, torture people, imprison children and do forced abortions. Bravo, Scientology, for getting away crimes against humanity within the borders of the United States. The Kim’s would admire Scientology.

    Mike, do you want to add “Captive Hearts Captive Minds – Freedom from Cults and Abusive Relationships” to your suggested reading list? What a great book for anyone ever dominated by a sociopath.

  13. Anon says

    I was on staff in an ideal org only 3 years ago, and I was NEVER asked as staff or public to NOT forward an email. Quite, quite the opposite, for the decades I was in Scientology, actually.

    “For obvious reasons?” It wasn’t obvious when I was in. So, things really must have changed rapidly in the past 3 years in regards to people leaving Scn and (the ensuing) declares.

    And they said it themselves.

  14. says

    Sounds like the lame cult is trying to pull a fast one on the bitter defrocked apostates. It “stinks” of you know what I mean. I can just hear them talking about their “caper”. Lame!!
    It is very funny that just “a few lying bitter SP’s” can scare the cult to death. Very weak but also very funny!! Run for the hills you cowards!! Don’t communicate, RUN and HIDE that is what you do best beside lie and cheat and deceive.

  15. outraged says

    Costello: The guy on first.

    Abbott: Who.

    Costello: The first baseman.

    Abbott: Who.

    Costello: The guy playing…

    Abbott: Who is on first!

    Costello: I’m asking YOU who’s on first.

    Abbott: That’s the man’s name.

    Costello: That’s who’s name?

    Abbott: Yes.

    Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

    Abbott: That’s it.

    Costello: That’s who?

    Abbott: Yes.

    • Mike Leopold says

      Elmer Fudd (index finger raised to his lips): “Shhh, be vewy quiet…I’m huntin’ wabbit.”

  16. Black Panther says

    God I don’t know what’s funnier – Mike’s ability to have me in stitches on the floor before I can finish reading his articles…….. or the comments that follow.

    I don’t comment that often, but I do read this blog daily (sometimes several times a day) and I think I would go into severe withdrawal without my daily “fix” of Mike Rinder and his merry band of followers!

    Thanks to all of you – I love being part of this community.
    Love BP

    • Formost says

      I don’t comment that often, but I do read this blog daily (sometimes several times a day) and I think I would go into severe withdrawal without my daily “fix” of Mike Rinder and his merry band of followers!

      I wonder if one can squeeze past the M4s on the new GAT II Student Hat while being entertained on this blog. Maybe yet another Checkpoint Charlie there. But then you can always mock up MUs as you go along to satisfy the W/Cers.

  17. Pepper says

    BTW, I have also wondered about the emails being bait to catch who is leaking them. I believe that people themselves are used by OSA to communicate with public and report back who is disaffected or natters. Mostly these are OTVIII’s, OL’s in the field or exSO highly trained public who are fully in the RCS.

    They are also used for the purpose to disseminate propaganda that everything’s going perfectly well too.

    I’ve had plenty of silly, outrageous lies told very happily right to my face by some of these.

  18. Pepper says

    Pat Parodi is a really nice person who I can only hope will someday wake up.

    It’s always been interesting to me how these guys will give instructions to the public not do this or that. Don’t read the news on the internet about Tom Cruise, don’t watch Anderson Cooper tonight, don’t pass emails. Doesn’t it make people curious and actually make them want to check out what’s happening? It always did me.

    In 2005 or 06, I was told by an OTVIII not to read a certain article on the internet. Well as soon as I could, I went to see what it was. There it was, on MSN’s main page. Turns out it was the one where someone at Gold talked about planting a meadow of flowers (well into the early morning hours) for Tom Cruise to frolic in with Nicole Kidman. This was to make Tom happy and create a good impression on Nicole.

    It would probably be best if the bitter, defrocked, lying, unemployed natterers on the internet were ignored but as we all know, this is a serious, deadly business where the lives of every man, woman and child are at stake.

  19. says

    “to change, to grow, to expand”

    Anyone who has worked in government knows that those three words are euphemisms for downsize, compromise and lower standards.

  20. DollarMorgue says

    “These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.”

    I want my lightsabre too! Been waiting for one of those for a looong time, long time. And why does the “church” (cough) that is ready to welcome all of Europe with open arms not want to see more than a select handful at its WUS grand re-re-reopening?

    Church of contradiction: mean what you don’t say, say what you don’t mean.

    Fringe bloggers: “Now witness the power of this fully armed and operational battle station!”

  21. Markthehungarian says

    Scientology is great! But don’t tell anyone, because we don’t want everyone to know!

    What a logic mind fuck. You have to be quite far down the rabbit hole to make that make sense. Part of me pities the Kool Aid drinkers, but part of me wants to see just how many blatant barefaced lies it takes to make these sheeple finally leave.

    Keep it up Mike! The pressure is rising, and all you are doing is putting information out there.

  22. Hingle McCringleberry says

    What’s the RPF sentence for misspelling the leader’s name? Is there a higher level of word clearing for that? Like something that hurts? They do it more than once. Miscavage.

    • boingooingo says

      OSA may be checking to see which misspellings got leaked…seriously, I think this is a way to smoke out the “secret SPs”. Hope not, as I’d hate to lose our windows into the madness.

  23. SadStateofAffairs says

    There is an obvious way for Mr. Biggest Being in the History of Life, the Universe and Everything to solve the problem. He should simply order that all Scientologist are from here on out forbidden from communicating with anyone by any means. That oughta do it.

  24. says

    No we can’t let that email leak to any of those undesirables (meaning most of the auditors in the LA Field) and “disaffects” (meaning most of the auditors in the LA Field) you know ’cause “ignorance is strength” and all that.

    From what I understand Pat Parody (did I spell it right 😉 ) has a close working (as in butt kissing and brown nosing sycophantic) relationship with OSA so you’re probably right to suggest that they are trying to smoke out a possible mole which probably includes about 90% of the LA public who are held in check by having a body in pawn (meaning a son or daughter or both in the SO) and probable future candidates for the “Loyalty Rundown”.

    My view is they’ll probably put a bunch of SO shipped in from the Magic Kingdom. To play the part of adoring public while most of the LA field stays home.

    • Aquamarine says

      “…a body in pawn…” Wow, that communicates the issue brilliantly. But seriousl, the “Loyalty Rundown”?
      That’s your sarcasm, right, remoteviewed?

      • remoteviewed says

        Unfortunately the organization exceeds my cynicism, sarcasm and irony at times.

        The word that there is such a rundown as the “Loyalty RD” came from a reliable inside source.

  25. Paul Cocovinis says

    So who is this Parodi guy exactly? If I were him I’d be rather concerned about the leaky nature of this e-mail, not least because he’s managed to mis-spell Dear Leader’s name on no less than 4 occasions here. I’ve known a staff member suffer the ignomy of being kicked out for the High Crime of simply failing to recognize him. Not sure what penalty this monumental quadruple insult/crime would deservedly incur but I sure wouldn’t want to be the fly.

    • LDW says

      Pat has been making a very good living for at least 20 years selling L’s to Los Angeles public. He used to be a decent enough guy. One of the few who would be sociable even if you didn’t have any money at the time. I suspect some of these guys keep the blinders on real tight because they make too much money to want to quit.

  26. Sarah says

    “Don’t worry be happy.” OSA and David Miscavige you are not paranoid. Just know the people who are watching your every move are learning a lot. Who knows, maybe just maybe they will be swayed by up stat- ness and will join your cult. On second thought …”Where’s Shelly?” Free Lori’s children and Free Barbara.

  27. Innocent Bystander says

    “Either way, the magnificent Cause Over All Life, Matter, Energy, Space And Time OT’s, led by Dear Leader, the Greatest Of All Big Beings are demonstrating they are completely effect of the tiny handful of bitter defrocked unemployed lying natterers on the fringes of the internet.”

    Mike, one of the most quotable quotes ever! Ha ha ha! Poor RCS, first it was the whole track psychs and their superior tech, now this – unemployed apostates hanging out on the fringes of the ‘net with their superior “blog” tech. Oh, the injustice of it all.

    On another note, has anyone heard a peep about the spectacular universe-changing wins from SuphaPowerz? Seems awfully quite over there for such a big deal…

    • Darien1.1 says

      I can haz supur powurz?!

      But seriously, don’t start talking about jedi. You think Co$ is the master of copywrite infringement? George Lucas is the OT VIII of suing the pants off people.

  28. Annabelle says

    Wowee Zowee is right!
    “Please do not forward this email to others….” Watch out, Dave. I’ll be the one holding the sign, “SCIENTOLOGY IS AN ABUSIVE GROUP. SAVE YOUR FAMILIES. SAVE YOUR MONEY.”
    Now you know which one will be me. Or maybe I’ll be the one holding the sign, “DAVID MISCAVIGE IS AN ABUSIVE SOCIOPATH.” Oh well, I’ll be one of them.

  29. SILVIA says

    Shhhh….the test center has been under construction for over a year…but you don’t need to broadcast that, really.

    And “truth allows to rise and to shine in the sun! Enjoy the warmth once again”….Shh…Black Heart has been freezing for years, wonder why. But The Jedi’s are coming to his rescue by attending his mumbling, sorry, his speech.

  30. says

    “…but we don’t want it going out on broad, “bulk” email lines; you can understand why, right?”
    And for the many who don’t understand, they have to pretend they understand, am I right?
    Someone should just ask.

      • Aquamarine says

        Think about it and its kind of sad. Here’s a church which has made so many enemies that it can’t let all and sundry know that a new church is being opened somewhere. Think, for a minute, how bizarre this is that the opening of a new church has to be carefully witheld from all but a few select parishioners.. This is how hated, feared and resented Miscavige’s Church of Scientology really is. But of course, the official line will be that the church is winning so much that its making the squirrels crazy. And the still-ins, the dazed, daft sheeple – they believe this. I used to.

    • Cooper Kessel says

      You can’t ask a question like that! You don’t have the fucking rank to ask that question. Back in your hole you low life scum bag!!!!!

    • Cindy says

      Mike, rev up that helicopter! And the reverse vector flow is not lost on me. Instead of them telemarketing to the public nonstop before an event like this, now they are contracting, hiding, pulling in, saying, “call us so that this doesn’t get in the wrong hands.” Further proof that they are getting smaller by the day and are utterly scared and paranoid.

      • Aquamarine says

        Cindy, you are spot on, and I’m having a cog on what you just wrote; to wit:

        Their consideration is: “Must outflow, can’t outflow”, so their solution is to try to outflow enthusiastically yet covertly. But it is impossible to communicate in both of these tone levels at the same time. One cannot be covertly enthusiastic. But they’re trying, they are really trying.

        Poor suckers, I almost feel sorry for them.

    • KFrancis says

      I can! In my vision though it’s a Navy Blackhawk coming in fast and low with its gun doors already open and a tequila fueled team of Navy Seals with bad attitudes on a mission in Hollywood. Go get em boys!

  31. Idle Morgue says

    Mike – I love how you bust them everytime! I always said – one can “handle” Scientology and Scientologist’s and see through the bullshit if one was a Scientologist who learned Scientologese! You fricken rock!

    It appears all Scientologist’s do these days is attend renovated buildings and listen to COB and then TOUR!

    Fun Church – real spiritual! LOL

  32. Old School says

    Pat’s Parody said, “I will provide you the specifics below but PLEASE, do not forward this email to others, it is for you only. Of course, you can tell others about the dates but we don’t want it going out on broad, “bulk” email lines; you can understand why, right?”

    No, I don’t know why this is. Tell me again, why is the Church is stopping broad dissem actions?

    p.s. I want my Light Sabre. It is owned to me.

    • KFrancis says

      You may have a Light Saber Old School and a complimentary night out on the town with Princess Leia for a donation of $5000.00. However, you must stay in good standing with RTC or at the end of one year your sabre will be turned off remotely and must be returned to Golden Era.

    • Cindy says

      K Francis, I was going to say that too but you beat me to it. Buy two of the super duper emeter and they’ll throw in a light saber and give you the title of Jedi Meritorious.

    • says

      It would seem that Mr. Parodi is very aptly named as he seems to write a parody of what he’s intending to get across. And, oh, the STUPENDOUS words and acclamations of what is actually not happening at all, i.e., rising stats, world expansion, KSW, etc.