A couple of other things you state in this blog entry truly penetrate: “The fact that Scientology morphed into a complete mind control, soul crushing cult cannot be ignored.” That is what the experience of being in this group had become for me as well. It grew so unpleasant and impossible to ignore.

Your recounting: “Their questioning was all along the line of ‘who told you there was something wrong with the church?’ When I answered that no one told me, I can simply observe for myself, they were not satisfied.”

This is what happened at our org, too. We had a special Sea Org mission come into town. In any one-on-one interview — in other words, it is just you answering questions in private and voicing what you experience and see — that was the response as well. “Who told you that?!” Very inflammatory, dictatorial, as though suddenly you are not in a place of spiritual learning but a fascist state. Eerie and off the rails from the L. Ron Hubbard issue, “Integrity” which is recited out-loud at every Sunday service. The essay about the necessity for a person to speak his or her truth as when you’ve lost that, you’ve lost everything.

“In this building?” I began to see, “Not a chance. It is an immediate means of getting in trouble.”

So disingenuous and, more and more, without any attempt to hide it.

Andy,

I am still thinking about your so accurate, so significant statement:

“I was left with a deep gashing hole in my soul and came here to lick my wounds.”.

For one thing you are the first person I have met in my 19 yrs that was honest enough and intelligent enough and articulate enough to figure out and say the honest truth.

As far I can tell, everyone that has did the bridge, in whole or in part, has a hole like you describe, at least to some degree and a mind that is fucked up, at least to some degree.

Actually you only have to spend sometime “in scientology” to get at least some damage, even in the fz..

It is like hot tar and sulphuric acid on your skin, while you are in quicksand.

If you are in the “CO$” you will have more serious damage.

And the longer you are in and the more you do in scientology, (the more of the bridge you do) while you are in the CO$, the more serious the damage is.

The less you know (the more naive, ignorant and gullible you are) (and the younger you are) (the more vulnerable you are) (the more feebleminded you are) and the more fucked up are, before you get into scn, the worse you will be damaged.

I got into scn relatively late in mylife. I was 44 in 97.

I was actually doing my own version of ” dianetics and scientology” for 27 yrs, before I learned about Dianetics from a TV commercial in 97.

But I did a lot of reading and research, (but did not find any answers), that really worked to solve my severe PTSD.

I read 100s of books.

I was already a very learned and quite experienced person, before I got into scn.

So I had a lot of data and experience to compare to what I saw and read in scn and the CO$.

And within a few days of being on course in the CO$ I realized that there was a lot of good in the data, but I also saw that the management and staff of the CO$ were insane. The extreme contradictions were incomprehendible to me. So I objected to any bullshit I saw. I called them on it.

For example: During interviews and sec checking they showed me a video of DM talking. Then they asked me what I thought of him? In all honesty, I said I think there is something wrong with him. That did not go over well with them.

That is the short story.

I wondered to my self, how can anyone make such a mess of such a good thing?

This was all new to me. I did not know what the fuck was going on, until some yrs later.

After calling them on it, the short story is I was soon declared PTS.

But after getting declared (again long story short) I acquired all the scn books from used sources, and read them all a few times.

I have to be honest and say that the scn books had most of the missing data that I needed on “my bridge” , my version of dianetics and scn.

The good parts of dianetics and scn, the truths in dianetics and scn are the most valuable data in the world to me. Also to everyone else in the world.

That data is how to resolve the problems of the spirit, the mind and life.

It is the only thing that can “save” man that I know of. And I have searched the world over.

If it exists elsewhere, it is so scattered through out 100s if not 1000s of books, and so ambiguous that it is practically impossible for the vast majority of people to find it. it takes many life times to figure it all out.

In dianetics and scn, it is all there. Whether it was stolen or plagerized or not, is not part of this point.

But/and it takes great knowledge and experience (indluding having very serious PTSD, to the point of being very dysfunctional/disabled) to be able to have the knowledge it takes to glean that special data from the works of Hubbard.

I was lucky enough to have a very good dianetics auditor to give me a very good dianetics demo, giving me a release that lasted a few hours. From that win, I knew that I knew I was on to something good.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Now all that being said, I want to add, that Hubbard placed very evil, insidious, diabolical, entrapping, slave making, soul killing, mind controlling, brain washing postulates (egregores) into his work (spoken and written words) that follow the work where ever it goes.

The truth is the best bait in the universe.

It takes incredibly great skill and great knowledge to identify the morsels of truth and glean them from the false and limiting data and entrapping data, and avoid getting trapped or snared by the egregores or evil postulates.

And I mean, even doing it on my own, outside the CO$.

Dio

Me too. Let’s meet at Old Surfer Dude’s party on the beach. He said when the church goes down, he’s hosting. But let’s have an Exie or Indie party anyway even if they aren’t all the way down. They are circling the drain and that’s a good start!

Mimsey and Andy, great posts. I laughed out loud at your picture of having a person laugh right in the MAA’s face when they bring up that tired old bludgeoning club, “we’ll withhold your eternity…” I sure wish someone would do that. Thank for the laugh.

These “only way” ideologies need to go the way of the dinosaur. They are toxic to society and breed hynotized self righteous and sometimes dangerous fools.

In my experience it is India that got it right. Dalai Lama is kicked out of Lhasa; no problem come on in and we’ll give you a home.

The Zororastrians, Christians and Jews were accepted with open arms. They did not come to India through violent conquest like some others did.

The Vedic system only sees one Creator, one God. But recognizes that there is unity in diversity. Many paths but one goal; spiritual liberation.

Many diverse practices that suite the diverse natures and mindsets of its participants.

No one true authority, an open source system based on practice and direct experience.

Yet in the end they all say that the purpose of life is beautiful, the goal of life sublime and joyful.

Unity in diversity, E Pluribus Unum; the same thing.

Thanks, Brian. Of course, you absolutely right!

Do the clams turn into Clam Zombies when the Clampoclypse comes? I’d pay good money to see that….