Oops… EDIT to my above comment…

First sentence of second paragraph should have read: “There’s a world of difference between pedophilia and a 19-year old guy……”

I miss the edit feature.

For the record, the definition of pedophilia is NOT just “anyone having sex with someone underage”. It is defined as an adult, or older adolescent, who has sexual urges or engages in sexual acts with pre-pubescent CHILDREN.

There’s a world of difference between a 19-year-old guy having consensual sex with his 17-year-old girlfriend. I don’t think most people would agree that anyone should “lock him up and throw away the key”. But depending upon the age of consent per state (in the US), it may or may not be illegal. And if it is illegal, it’s not defined as pedophilia, but falls under the statutory rape/sexual assault/corruption of a minor law.

As far as actual pedophilia is concerned, you seem to be trying to defend the indefensible. The “term” is not the problem; the horrific act of an adult going after a young child is the problem. I don’t care what you call it — it’s still despicable, horribly abusive and illegal. And it’s why we have laws in place — to protect children from sick deviants who seek to abuse them sexually.

I certainly wouldn’t want to live in a culture where true pedophiles aren’t punished harshly. Do you have young kids? If not, come talk to me when you do and some monster rapes one of them. Then we can discuss whether or not it’s “fashionable” for a parent to want to literally kill the disgusting pig who forever scarred their innocent child.

jere,
Understood on everything!
Omg, how the hell can one “be” one’s loved one or anybody else if there’s no communication, if that person can’t/won’t communicate?
For whatever reason!
No communication is the worst.
A nightmare.
You’re well out that relationship if I may opine 🙂
Sounds like you have a happy marriage now.
And may I also say, jere, that you come across as very caring.
Your spouse is a lucky lady 🙂
I’m sure you’ll say that you’re very lucky too 🙂

Aqua, I didn’t read it as he and she working together, but I heard her focussing on her having to create HIS 2D as well as hers, her making *everything* “go right” from her position. The impossibility of that is something I understand from my 1st “marriage” where I had to guess at what she needed/wanted as she couldn’t/wouldn’t talk to me about such things; ‘Twas frustrating, of course, and ultimately deadly for the relationship —such as it was. As I was still a good scientologist at that time, I took responsibility for it ALL; I just couldn’t DO it all; it’s impossible. AS IF I could guess, with little or no data, what she needed/wanted from me. It was all so similar to scientology. For all their lip service to communication, scientologists really suck at actually talking things out, communicating their current feelings rather than the proper thoughts about what they should be or might be feeling. Instead. they’re like two Aspergers sufferers talking past each other, neither actually saying anything the other can relate to.
Part of my error that first time around in marriage was accepting that level of uncommunicativeness common to scientologists. scns can’t talk about ‘their case’. It’s verboten; That bleeds into never speaking of their*feelings*; only talking about their thoughts, like good little robots. There are times when it’s GOOD to say “I don’t feel quite right” about some subject and be able to talk it out with your partner; That’s something scientology’s “No Case outside of a formal session” proscription rules out. Thus, two spouses really are hamstrung from working things out together. Each has to do it separately. In that situation, my advice is still: RUN! Find someone who you really can talk with about the important things, as well as the trivial things which can blow up into *IMPORTANT* things. It’s much more satisfying in the end – – or in the middle,or beginning.

Ballet Lady I agree with you, “I find it mind blowing that Harvey W. is in court for some of the same type crimes Danny Masterson committed yet…….Danny still hasn’t faced the music…” Ditto for Bill Cosby. He used the rape drug to knock them out and then raped them. That’s what Danny did too. So why isn’t Danny even charged with any of it? DA Lacey is why. She is despicable and should be voted out of office.

Yes, I have recommended Lord of the Flies previously on this blog. It was one of the books I read when I left the Sea Org. The mindset of the characters in that book describes the denizens of The Hole to a “T”…

Has it ever occurred to you the parallels between the true workings of Scientology, especially post LRH, and another dystopian novel, The Lord of the Flies by William Golding?

Regards as always,

🙂

Laugh Out Loud, Mary K!

All she’s saying is that the woman has to “be” the man insofar as looking from his viewpoints and acting accordingly and the man has to “be” the woman as regards looking from her viewpoints, and acting accordingly.

If they’re going to a restaurant and he’s in the mood to “be” her, he’ll pick a place he knows she would like or at least one that she won’t hate. He looks from her viewpoint and acts accordingly.

When she’s getting ready to go out with him, she knows he’s always on time and tardiness is one of his “things” and so she’s ready on time. She looks from HIS viewpoint and acts accordingly.

What’s the big deal? Meaning, apart from the lingo, apart from HOW it is communicated.

Each of them “being” each other could translate very simply into them treating one another with consideration, thoughtfulness and respect!

But I agree that the language can drive you wild.