To: Aquamarine
From: David Miscavige COB RTC
Re: keeping confidential information confidential.

Don’t let that get around! I want it to be a surprise!
And I am still waiting on delivery of those condoms and toilet paper from a while back as well as those statues of me minus the apple crate for all my ideal orgs.

ML
Dave

You know, you guys…of course you’re being cute but you really could be hitting on something. What if – what if, this TV SuMP thing has all been PLANNED OUT by Miscavige as being THE thing that he can use an excuse to Himself BOW OUTof the cult? STEP DOWN as leader?

Of course, he won’t use that these terms! No no!

More like, (at a special event for this announcement only )

“Well, listen, the SPs are out in full force now. SuMP was reaching too many damned people. SPs are going wild! Too much for us to handle now even with the amazing tech at our disposal, so I’m off to research what LRH left us above OT 12, and never fear, a plan is in place to ensure that we continue to expand as we’ve been doing, its just that I’ll be off the main grid of planet earth doing this, you know, research, so that ultimately when we reach Target Two…”…

Some kind of shit like this, some kind of plausible spiel palmed off to the sheeple to get Him out of Dodge with his lawyers and all the money!

Ok, so much for conspiracy theories in the early AM. Big imagination, what can I tell’ya?

Yes, convulsive movements, then a death rattle.

Exactly, wayc! Like Mel Brooks (one of my heroes) says: “The way to fight evil is to laugh at it”. And he’s right, and a genius in his way. After all, he made us laugh at Adolph Hitler! Anyone who could make the Holocaust funny is onto something as regards fighting evil. Don’t let the bastards get you down! Laugh at them! Laugh right in their ugly faces, and carry on being decent and being happy. Mike Rinder is also onto this, big time, working his dry humor satire into facts which of themselves are anything but funny. This is a gift!

Yes, can you imagine? Actually, I believe that Miscavige eliminated the post. Its still there in name but its what’s called in Scientology a “camouflaged hole” because its a job title and post in name only. Miscavige long ago had to have realized that no one can any longer do this job! Certainly HE couldn’t, even if the job were not so very “beneath Him” – LOL!

That’s the NOI for ya!

You forgot to add the phrase “you fucking little dwarf!”

Is his friend, Bubba with him?

The key to the bathroom…