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Thursday Funnies

October 28, 2021 By Mike Rinder 15 Comments

 

 

Flourish and Prosper?

Andres Rodriguez has been in the Sea Org forever. What does he know about flourishing and prospering? 

 

It’s time for spiritual freedom…

And they have a “completion” — though not an OT level.

No doubt she got a bunch of sec checking.

 

The Chan Man is Back….

Not sure he ever went anywhere.

You gotta hear his take on “solvent particles” — it’s “Part 2.” so tough if you missed part 1.

Is this a Chemistry lesson? Or perhaps he is teaching people how to open a cleaning business?

 

The Caped Crusader

Dr. Alex Alemis is a leader of what exactly?

 

Chicago going all in…

The Chan Man IN PERSON!

How this guy manages to con all these orgs into promoting him so he can collect FSM Commissions is pretty amazing. Tells you what sort of Div 6 they have that they don’t public lecturers that can do anything.

 

Freedom….

As long as you have the money to buy it.

 

A “Hybrid Event Briefing”

All about how the world is ending. Just like in 1966?

 

WISE “Ambassador”?

What is that?

And they say WISE is NOT designed to “bring people into scientology” — his claim to fame is that he “introduced 5,000 for Dianetics and Scientology.”

 

 

10th Anniversary

And the celebration is a “special graduation”.

Then again, in 10 years they have accomplished not a thing. They have less staff and public than the day they opened. They have a building that is falling to pieces. And an ongoing lawsuit over the death of the samurai sword man….

But they are offering a “gourmet” Italian dinner.

 

Powered by the Hubbard(r) Management System

And this is the best they can come up with?

If she is so good at social media how is it she only has 60k followers? That is a big success? I don’t use any Hubbard(r) tech and I have more Twitter followers than her…

Maybe she could teach the org how to use social media? They are incredible inept.

 

A bunch of kids!

CLO Africa is trying to recruit staff for Joburg North org.

 

Graduation/IAS Event

They used to do these as separate things.

Either they can’t get anyone to show up for Graduation, or they can’t get anyone to show up for IAS events or both.

Pretty soon we will see Graduation/IAS/Ideal Org/Auditor’s Day all combined into one event

Even then, I don’t think anyone will show up unless they offer free food.

 

That’s his “Game Face”

New Zealanders are so nice!

 

He’s got the swagger…

Crossed arms.

A special signature just like Ron.

Gaudy pins and bracelet.

And absolutely no clue.

 

Gearing up to 40 books…

Means they are probably doing less than 5. But they are “thinking big.”

 

Halloween

Noon to 3pm?

 

They come from everywhere

Except Africa.

 

Graduation AND refreshments provided

See, they know what to promote. It’s far more effective than “a special briefing about the IAS.”

But you have to “reserve your seat” otherwise you might not get in… 🙂

 

This is weird

Wonder if Pat is going to tell the story about the Ontario Provincial Police raid and prosecution and conviction of scientology in Toronto? It was a pretty big thing for her to overcome….

 

 

Another Noon to 3 Halloween bash

I guess they know nobody would come to the org during the evening….

 

 

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Filed Under: Funnies Tagged With: Alex Alemis, Andres Rodriguez, AOLA, AOSH Africa, AOSH ANZO, Auckland, Chicago org, Flag, fundraising, IAS, Joburg North, Katie Dean, Marc De Turck, Michael Chan, Pat Felske, Rafferty Pendery, Sydney, valley org, Vancouver org

Comments

  1. Imaberrated says

    October 30, 2021 at 12:55 am

    I suspect that the Sydney Org completion is Taiwanese, continuing the servicing of foreign people in Sydney. It gave them what could be considered a boom around the turn of the century. Not servicing your own area is okay if you’re getting money from elsewhere, like the South African AO does.

    Reply
  2. Mark Kamran says

    October 29, 2021 at 4:02 am

    But still ,where are the public ?
    It’s the emptiness creating great void.

    Why so shy away with humans and put all resources in nonmoveables. A phenomenon signifies the end of Cult’s days.

    It’s time to move in isolation for next 50 years, otherwise it’s a Final count down.

    Reply
  3. Revolted says

    October 28, 2021 at 2:43 pm

    “Gourmet Italian dinner”? Would that be Chef Boyardee spaghetti?

    Reply
    • Loosing my Religion says

      October 29, 2021 at 1:01 am

      As an Italian wherever I went abroad, when there were these buffets with ‘Italian cuisine’, I was baffled. How many things passed off as Italian cuisine, but often they were just poultices of things mixed together with pasta.
      Who knows at that event what they will serve as Italian ‘food’ – they will have done everything cheaply, poor ingredients, such as rubber mozzarella, pasta made in …?, etc.

      Reply
    • Aquamarine says

      October 30, 2021 at 1:08 am

      I laughed when I read that.

      My boyfriend – I’m very lucky, because my significant other grew up with an Irish mother who not only hated to cook but was terrible at it. And then, his late wife, whom he loved and cherished, and who is the mother of his grown daughters ALSO dislike cooking and was bad at it.

      Now, I’m not bad – I can cook fairly well, very plain things, mostly. I am no gourmet. I would not call myself a good cook. I’m ok. You’re not going to starve.

      My late mother, who was Italian American and an amazing cook, taught me some of what she knew, but I lost her early, and so the lessons stopped. What she taught me, I learned well. For instance, I make very good spagetti sauce, and meatballs – her recipe and its amazing,, everyone says so. Ditto fried chicken, and real french fries meatloaf and mashed potatoes – very plain, uninspired food. And she taught me to make sugar cookies. But I lost her when I was 14. She would have taught me all that she knew, which was a lot, but she passed away, anyway…

      I lucked out with this guy in that to him, homemade red sauce spaghetti and meatballs with a tossed green salad and some bread sticks- THIS, for him, is a gourmet Italian meal. Because of my work schedule and his work schedule we eat out a lot. Anything I make for him at home, anything I throw together that’s homemade, is a HUGE deal. He’s in awe. Its very funny because there is NOTHING remarkable about my cooking AT ALL (and I’m not being falsely modest) But for him, with a mother who was a bad cook, and then a wife of 32 years who before her death and throughout their marriage hated to cook, and his two grown daughters who took after their mother and grandmother and never cook at all, well, compared to them, my modest and limited efforts place me defacto right next to Julia Child 🙂

      Reply
  4. Zee Moo says

    October 28, 2021 at 12:54 pm

    Forty raw books!!! What if I want mine barbecued? Good luck actually selling 40 books. I expect a Battle Field Earth type of buy and return.

    Reply
  5. Dotey OT says

    October 28, 2021 at 12:50 pm

    Mr. Chan says some really, really weird shit. Even old timers go “huh? Is that what lrh meant??”

    And lrh says some real round-the-bend shit.

    Chan takes that weird lrh shit and runs with it.

    And everyone goes “wow” and they think “wtf did he just say?”

    Then the S.O. guys say “fuck it, he’s on a roll!” and then they let him ramble on.

    Reply
  6. Doug Sprinkle says

    October 28, 2021 at 12:45 pm

    Isn’t Andres Rodriguez the one I saw a video of a few years ago claiming that either a hundred or a thousand new people were coming into Big Blue everyday? I think he said a lot of former members were coming back because of the Going Clear documentary? That the former members were so outraged by the lies propagated in that film that they were coming back because of it.

    Reply
    • Fred G. Haseney says

      October 28, 2021 at 7:53 pm

      The documentary GOING CLEAR didn’t send me back to SCN. Oh no, it did just the opposite. The Angry Gay Pope and I laughed so hard at key points in the movie that we drove two guys who had been sitting in front of us to another part of the movie theater. I spent 37 years in that cult and escaped just before the release of GOING CLear.

      What a way to “debrief”!

      Fred

      Reply
  7. Believe or Else says

    October 28, 2021 at 12:36 pm

    It’s the “Golden Age of Fundraising!”

    You don’t want to miss that!

    Reply
  8. Free Minds, Free Hearts says

    October 28, 2021 at 11:22 am

    You misspoke about Inglewood not doing anything in 10 years, Mike. Au contraire. Look at that photo with fifteen – yes, FIFTEEN – people in it who have gotten gone clear or done those other services they listed. Why my goodness, that is 1.5 people a year! Such an accomplishment.

    Reply
  9. otherles says

    October 28, 2021 at 10:35 am

    *More facepalming*

    Reply
  10. Ms. B. Haven says

    October 28, 2021 at 10:25 am

    These flyers never come right out and say what they really mean. They are always crafted around what Hubbard called a ‘mystery sandwich’. This plays on people’s natural curiosity in a very bad way. Sort of like putting razor blades in Halloween candy.

    I have decoded Mr. Rafferty Pendry’s brochure statement for those who may not have tasted one of Hubbard’s poisonous sandwiches:
    “The successful program that’s helped hundreds expand & rocket up The Bridge and how you can use it”

    This “successful program” consists of begging, borrowing and or stealing as much money as you can from anyone you know. After one has maxed out their own resources, it’s time to tap into those around you. The only endless expansion you’ll get will be expanding the amount of debt you will never be able to repay with your newly gained abilities as a result of going up ‘the bridge’ to nowhere.

    Reply
    • Aquamarine says

      October 28, 2021 at 9:02 pm

      Meow Alert:

      This aging, trying so very hard to look sexy, Clairol-Gone-Wrong platinum blonde with the see-thru cheap lace top that looks like it was grabbed off the Everything Must Go Halloween Costume rack at Stop and Shop…how can this woman even dream of leaving the house this way? Director of Special Affairs…yeah. Real special.

      Reply
    • Mark Kamran says

      October 28, 2021 at 10:37 pm

      But still ,where are the public ?
      It’s the emptiness creating great void.

      Why so shy away with humans and put all resources in nonmoveables. A phenomenon signifies the end of Cult’s days.

      It’s time to move in isolation for next 50 years, otherwise it’s a Final count down.

      Reply

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