• Home
  • About Me
  • Mission Statement
  • Welcome Message
  • Open Letter to My Family
  • Donate
  • Contact Me

Mike Rinder's Blog

Something Can Be Done About It

  • All Posts
  • Disconnection
  • Idle Orgs
  • IAS
  • Media
  • Books
  • Fundraising
  • Regraded Being

Thursday Funnies

February 13, 2020 By Mike Rinder 44 Comments

 

It’s the best they’ve got…

Funny how they tell you sitting in a sauna will make you “Think More Clearly” and lo and behold, the success story says just that!

 

Get your kids in for an OCA! Find their ruin!

Lydia Hopwood is a menace…

Trying to earn FSM Commissions from kids, pimping them right to the reg.

 

Well, not really.

Not even “salvaging Columbus” actually.

Wonder how many of these are Sea Org members and other staff shanghai’d and told to “replace themselves” in order to go home.

This will be down to less than half this number in a couple of months. Then back to the same old 10-15 hardcore lifers within a year.

 

They’re having a large impact on reversing the dwindling spiral…

Seriously.

 

Tens of books will be sold

At least.

What exactly is the decade of freedom?

 

Disaster Responders Beware

 

What is the mystic to being a leader?

Apparently these guys know.

 

Gee, he’s on fire…

Just a word to the wise — “he works one-on-one with the IAS” is code for “he is a Reg.”

 

Kids Valentine’s Day?

These people really are shameless when it comes to getting “bodies in the shop.”

 

How to disseminate?

Don’t mention scientology at all

 

The Chan Man is back!!

And it’s FREE

 

Rather go to the free one 

Patrick was standing at the edge of the candidates forum last night cringing at all the discussion about Scientology and Miscavige…

 

Not something you will ever get from scientology…

Just see how long it last if HCO decides you are no good.

 

 

Another high level grade chart completion

These ideal orgs don’t seem to ever make Clears and Classed auditors

 

Yeah, St. Patrick’s Day is the perfect reason to go to the scientology place

 

You can get a free personality test!

It will pinpoint exactly how screwed up you are and how we can fix you.

 

Come on in, we have cheese…

Just like any other mousetrap

 

Stops? 

We can revitalize you. Just bring money.

 

Last time I checked…

They speak Irish Gaelic and English in Ireland?

 

Typical LRH definition…

Weird

 

Do these people know who they are teamed up with?

 

I need money

I can do auditing — after I do the course

 

Do these people know who they are connected with?

 

You don’t need to mention scientology

 

Auditor career?

Not much future in it…

 

He’s a Playah…

Share this...
Share on Facebook
Facebook
Pin on Pinterest
Pinterest
Tweet about this on Twitter
Twitter
Share on LinkedIn
Linkedin

Filed Under: Funnies Tagged With: Columbus, Dublin, Ideal Orgs, Lydia Hopwood

Comments

  1. Foremost says

    February 19, 2020 at 11:56 am

    What Kristal really meant to say is … “What it means to be on THE staff”.

    Reply
  2. Foremost says

    February 19, 2020 at 11:46 am

    OT I … You get a big-a$$ed fancy framed certificate for doing 13 quick locationals hanging around bus terminals, malls, train stations, etc.?

    Reply
  3. Espy, J & D says

    February 14, 2020 at 2:40 pm

    THE Rob Meister… rob-o-rama…the Rob-inator, disseminating scieno!! Robster McRobington, Robby, makin copies!!

    Reply
  4. Wynski says

    February 14, 2020 at 11:32 am

    Helen Vion is the typical down and out scamologist begging for money. In past times any group that produced people like this would have their premises burnt to the ground and leaders run out of the area or imprisoned.

    Reply
    • Aquamarine says

      February 14, 2020 at 2:51 pm

      Wynski,

      And this is you on one of your warm and fuzzy days 🙂

      But I’m not judging as just yesterday I was in a mood to drown all the idiotic still ins we read about on this blog.

      Happy Valentine’s Day to you, Mike and all here.

      Reply
  5. Ever met an SP? says

    February 14, 2020 at 8:50 am

    Kristel is Clear. Glad to hear it.

    Reply
  6. LoosingMyReligion says

    February 14, 2020 at 4:13 am

    Real LOL! I need it today. There are a lot of seminars on how to disseminate and get people in the orgs. Usually it’s s a pump them all up and get them to do something. They get told “use arc, be positive, use infinite control, be uptone, be ‘look at me I am doing just great’, get you trs in, and find any kind of ruin and use it merciless!”
    Crap tech. They are fixed on the same repetitive robotic steps. “We have any needed tech to save the world”. What!?! You are rolling down the hill and collapsing since decades. But everything is great, Like the Titanic going down but the orchestra keeps playing. Diletants.

    Reply
  7. Aquamarine says

    February 13, 2020 at 9:44 pm

    “What is the mystic to being a leader?”

    Yo Koolaid Drinkers:
    The term for this is MYSTIQUE.
    Not “mystic”.
    “Mystic” means something else, entirely.
    So: “What is the MYSTIQUE to (of) being a leader?”.
    Answer: Nothing. Absolutely nothing. There is no mystique.
    There are qualities needed in order to be a leader but there’s nothing secret, mysterious, baffling or unfathomable about any of them.
    Some advice now, from me to you:
    Stay home.
    Or go out for pizza.
    Or Chinese food.
    Wash your hair; walk the dog.
    Whatever.
    Just don’t attend this seminar.
    Guaranteed you’ll learn nothing.
    Much love,
    Aqua

    Reply
  8. Aquamarine says

    February 13, 2020 at 6:43 pm

    Helene,
    Why are you broke and begging on a Scientology website for some sort of non-specific job
    You have all these skills plus you can speak 4 languages fluently.
    Yet, you’ll “do anything”?
    If you have so many skills and abilities, why don’t you just go out and get yourself a real job?
    You know, send your resume out, go on interviews.
    Seriously!
    Who cares how you’re going to spend your own money once you’ve earned it?
    Why should anyone hire you because of how you’ll be spending your earnings?
    In the real world, people get hired for jobs because they know how to do the work.
    Stop begging your fellow Scientologists to hire you.
    Stop the wheedling.
    Grow up. Pick something you’d like to do and are good at. Take the skills you claim you have into the market place and get yourself a job.
    Much love,
    Aqua

    Reply
  9. Shereefe says

    February 13, 2020 at 5:48 pm

    NYPD needs to be informed about Drug Free World’s origin. I don’t know anything about the group, what they do, where they go but, I will read up on it. No excuse though, PD’s should look up who the hell is giving them awards. OR could they not be aware they won the “title” HERO from Scientology??? I wouldn’t put it past someone to just throw a name on a poster, without that person knowing. Am I making sense???? Damn,, now I got to find out.( And this is how one gets in trouble lol)

    Reply
  10. Take Em Down says

    February 13, 2020 at 4:27 pm

    The higher levels of Scientology (Xenu) are a satire against the Creation theories. In this respect, they are not a religion. Only the lower levels of scientology would survive as being a religion…..

    Reply
  11. Glenn says

    February 13, 2020 at 2:57 pm

    Amazingly appropriate to “Thursday Funnies” is an email a friend got from the cult today. It contains the following Hubbard quote;

    “The reason you’ve got Scientology is, to a large degree, because it’s right here that there’s a breathing period on Earth. Just a little breathing period. I don’t know how many years it is from here to the other, but you’ve already seen it begin.”…

    “So don’t worry about the atomic bomb from a standpoint of wiping out all human beings. No, it’s something else. It’s ‘Let’s shut down the communication lines of knowledge.’ –L. Ron Hubbard, 8 December 1952 ARC/CYCLES: THEORY AND AUTOMATICITY”

    It is funny because the cult always tries to shut down communication lines that would allow knowledge to be acheived. Fair game, disconnection, smearing and so much more.

    Despicable.

    Reply
    • Aquamarine says

      February 13, 2020 at 9:58 pm

      @Glenn,
      Ironic, yeah, that they became what they were made to fear so much. And in so doing, they also became a cult.

      Reply
  12. Take Em Down says

    February 13, 2020 at 2:01 pm

    I watched an old Mark Bunker YOUTUBE video where he went into a Clearwater pizza parlor, and was refused pizza after they guards noticed him. My first thought was to lay down a $500 pizza order to the establishment. My second thought was maybe the pizza wouldn’t be safe to eat if they filled the order…..

    Reply
    • Aquamarine says

      February 14, 2020 at 12:59 am

      Refused pizza, eh?
      Well, who can blame them?
      After all, Mark Bunker is dangerous enough on his own.
      But Mark Bunker with a pizza?
      Whoa, Nellie!

      Reply
  13. Zee Moo says

    February 13, 2020 at 1:41 pm

    When ever I see $cientologists ‘salvaging the planet’, the theme song to Sanford and Son goes off in my mind. Can $cientology rid me of this engram?

    Reply
    • Take Em Down says

      February 13, 2020 at 2:26 pm

      “The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster” might be able to rid you of that specific “man-tall” antisocial behavior….

      Reply
  14. jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

    February 13, 2020 at 1:29 pm

    “Just see how long it last if HCO decides you are no good.”

    See how long it lasts after you run out of MONEY

    Reply
  15. jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

    February 13, 2020 at 1:17 pm

    Salvaging Mankind?? More like Savaging Mankind….

    SALVAGE YOURSELVES!

    RUN, NOW

    Reply
  16. jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

    February 13, 2020 at 1:09 pm

    “Tens of books will be sold”??

    If they’re lucky, maybe 10.

    Reply
  17. ValR says

    February 13, 2020 at 12:37 pm

    Ok, I was curious about the robmeister, professional musician, so i went to his official website and watched about 2 minutes (as long as I could tolerate) of a music video he made in 2017 – or some over emoting Junior High School student made for him, not sure which. His voice isn’t bad, but it’s basically middle of the road good too.

    The thing that got me on his website was the “Positive Change” tab and his typo ridden spiel This is a copy paste directly from his website, check out how he can’t capitalize the i when talking about himself and he talks about people living quite lives of suffering. Yep, he must have been raised on study tech.

    “I think one would have to be a very cold and callous person to not care about the state of ones fellow man. Personally i love to see people happy and i consider my value in proportion to how much help i can give.

    Though it is good to give money to valuable causes, it is much more rewarding to also lend a hand one on one – even if just by listening. It blows my mind how many people live a quite life of suffering simply because they have never spoken about their grievances – that’s why i became a Scientology Volunteer Minister. With the tools i learned on that course, i know i can help anyone get some relief and get on the road of helping themselves – providing of course that they want the help!

    Help those around and if you don’t know what to do, learn! There are many great ways to help someone and it is much more rewarding than turning a blind eye!”

    Respect

    RM”

    Reply
    • ValR says

      February 13, 2020 at 12:38 pm

      ps (FWIW the i that I didn’t capitalize in my first paragraph of my intro was intentional as a laugh at robmeister’s inability to capitalize his i’s in reference to himself).

      Reply
    • christopher baranet says

      February 13, 2020 at 1:15 pm

      Rob was a fixture around Flag for many years palying and singing by the pool at night, and after graduatiom. As a performer ? Hes okay, nothing to write home about. Nice voice. I gues he found regging for the IAS was much more profitable.

      Reply
    • Imaberrated says

      February 13, 2020 at 3:30 pm

      He hasn’t done Key to Life!

      Reply
  18. Old Surfer Dude says

    February 13, 2020 at 11:58 am

    Stops? We can revitalize YOU!!! (Cough, cough). Just bring money.

    And that, ladies & gentlemen IS Scientology.

    Reply
    • jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

      February 13, 2020 at 1:31 pm

      OSD:”Just bring money.”

      Lots and LOTS of money.

      Reply
      • Old Surfer Dude says

        February 13, 2020 at 5:46 pm

        Oh, alright. What demoninion? Remember…surfers aren’t rich. But, we are lovable!

        Reply
  19. PeaceMaker says

    February 13, 2020 at 11:37 am

    At least the little Mission of the Foothills – it’s the one that’s been begging for years for money to updgrade its dated old basement commercial-industrial space – is finally admitting that it’s hard to disseminate. Weren’t they pushing the supposed answers to that problem not long ago? They can’t admit that Scientology doesn’t work in any respect, so they’re struck doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results

    I bet it’s more than likely that Lydia Hopwood’s “friend KK” has a name hard to pronounce in English, meaning yet more overseas workers being brought in due to the lack of recruits in the US.

    And “conflitos” is Portuguese. The address on the promo piece turns out to be for Andre Ramos Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, so apparently they’re targeting an immigrant community in Dublin – I wonder if that means that things aren’t going so well with the actual Irish in Ireland?

    Reply
    • Angry Gay Pope says

      February 13, 2020 at 11:48 am

      I’ll be doing a video where I went into the foothills mission and infiltrated. You are right they are pathetic. They almost boast about it when they were hitting on me for $$$$

      Reply
    • jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

      February 13, 2020 at 1:21 pm

      You’re saying that the “mission in the foothills” is really the “cult in the cellar”?

      So where IS that video?

      Reply
    • jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

      February 13, 2020 at 1:32 pm

      Peacemaker opined:
      “I bet it’s more than likely that Lydia Hopwood’s “friend KK” has a name hard to pronounce in English, meaning yet more overseas workers being brought in due to the lack of recruits in the US.”

      *I* won’t bet against that sure deal.

      Reply
    • Cindy says

      February 13, 2020 at 2:53 pm

      Hi, Re her friend, KK, I believe that is Jim and Barbara Kalergis’ daughter. They called her KK all her life. So she is a second generation staff member who can’t get bodies in the shop, so she’s begging for Scns to send their kids, their own second generation in. Lydia Hopwood is a piece of work. She’s as dyed in the wool as they come and is militant about it and is antagonistic and nasty. And she is very money motivated. Yes she is pimping the kids to the reg to get the commission. My big complaint about bringing in young kids to “find their ruin” is that most kids if they’re being raised right, don’t have a ruin. They are happy with life. And if there is some kind of kerflufflle at school, the parents can talk to the kid to help them with that. No auditing needed. But to demand a ruin of a young kid where there may be non is to eff them up.

      Most guys I know who got into Scn as college kids tell me that their ruin was how to talk to girls, or they were shy etc. Scn handles that ruin for them and they’re off to the races. But a little kid won’t have those kinds of problems for another 10 or more years. So don’t push them to get their ruin found when they’re too young. Ron said don’t even audit kids till the are 12 or older. So why are they breaking their own rules?

      Reply
      • PeaceMaker says

        February 13, 2020 at 5:33 pm

        Cyndi, I could have made a wrong assumption – but checking, the Kalergis’ look to be too old to have a daughter that age, and unless I was on the wrong track their daughters also don’t look like the young woman.

        Obviously Scientology is desperate. I assume the justification now must be that kids have “ruin” from past lives – how much of a stretch is that?

        Reply
        • Aquamarine says

          February 13, 2020 at 10:25 pm

          Child Ruin:

          “Just got home from the park with Daddy. I hate Mommy! Daddy had just bought me a double dip chocolate cone. I told him over and over and over how hungry I was! And how I needed the ice cream cone. Over and over I told him. About a hundred times! And he FINALLY bought it for me! But Mommy wouldn’t let me eat it! Said she’d made my favorite broiled chicken and mashed potatoes dinner and I had to eat THAT before I could have any ice cream! She took the ice cream cone right out of my hand! Put it in the freezer for me to eat after dinner! And I’m too short to reach the freezer door when she’s not looking! I hate Mommy! She’s so mean!”

          Cult:
          “There, there now.. Scientology can help you with this.”

          Reply
        • Annie Oakley says

          February 13, 2020 at 11:23 pm

          I agree. I knew KK and Panda (their other daughter) I just did the math and they’d be in their mid-to-late 30’s about now. (And now I feel really old…lol)

          Reply
  20. Jerry Hack says

    February 13, 2020 at 10:31 am

    Rob Meister? What a great name for a Registrar! “I’m the Robmeister! I’m here to take your money!” “Call me Rob! It’s not my name, it’s what I do!” The stuff writes itself!

    Reply
  21. Brian says

    February 13, 2020 at 10:18 am

    A thought that comes to me when I see these ads is the stare Scientologist’s get by hrs and hrs of TRs.

    It took me years to stop gathering energy in my brain and sending it out my eyes thinking that I am “there”.

    It reminds me of that Panorama interview with Hubbard when he’s being asked tough questions and you can see his TRs go in. But what comes out of his eyes is disdain for the interviewer.

    Reply
    • jere Lull (39 years recovering) says

      February 13, 2020 at 1:35 pm

      Brian, I so remember the stares that I don’t really notice them any more. Those tightly-folded arms, though: They speak “so closed & remote, no idea of empathy or good will.”

      Reply
  22. SILVIA says

    February 13, 2020 at 10:09 am

    The girl from Germany willing to work to earn money and pay for Solo NOTs has a lot of stops…she can do WISE, BUT needs to pay a license, she can do GAT, BUT also needs to pay for a license, she also is dying to do OT V and VII, BUT has debts.

    The common denominator of the ‘BUTs’ is? That is right! MONEY, what this church is greedy for.

    Reply
    • Cindy says

      February 13, 2020 at 2:55 pm

      Don’t forget, can drive BUT doesn’t have a car.

      Reply
    • Imaberrated says

      February 13, 2020 at 3:33 pm

      It’s pathetic. This is supposed to be a highly capable person, and they’re mired in problems.

      Reply
      • Aquamarine says

        February 14, 2020 at 1:08 am

        And they whine to each other and beg from one another, and sponge, mooch and grub off of one another. Because its a swawy world. They can’t work in the Wog World. Too scawy.

        Sickening, really.

        Heads up: this is not one of my compassionate days.

        Reply
  23. Graham says

    February 13, 2020 at 9:44 am

    Helene Vion is OT IV and she’s in debt? All those super-powerz and she can’t keep her head above water financially? When’s the metaphorical penny going to drop Helene? Oh yeah: it’ll all come right on the next level. Like it did when you went Clear. Like it did when you completed OT I. Like it did when you completed OT II, OT III, OT IV. Where’s the beef Helene?

    Kids’ Valentines Day? Creepy.

    Reply
  24. Peggy L says

    February 13, 2020 at 9:26 am

    Lydia is a parasite! How low can you go Lydia? I believe that you need to wake up and find out your own ruin, which is preying on children. How much ruin can a child have – they are children! (their parents need a double dose of get a clue) Do they have to bring their piggy banks? Absolutely – I can’t think of the exact words, but they would not be nice ones.

    LOL, looks like Rob Meister is way too close to the fire – his hair is standing on end – static?

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Order now hardback or audiobook
Click Here to Donate

Important Articles

Dealing With Scientology Critics - L Ron Hubbard Playbook
The Real Story About Disconnection
To Speak Or Not To Speak
Shelly Miscavige Guarded By Armed PIs
Debbie Cook's New Years Email
On David Miscavige's Behavior
Miscavige's Behavior Part 2
A Letter From Garcia

Important Quotes

If the org slumps during this transition period, don't engage in "fund raising" or "selling postcards" or borrowing money. Just make more income with Scientology. L Ron Hubbard From HCOPL URGENT ORG PROGRAMMING
"We own a tremendous amount of property. We own a tremendous amount of material and so forth, and it keeps growing. But that’s not important. When buildings get important to us, for God sakes, some of you born revolutionists will you please blow up central headquarters". L Ron Hubbard Lecture 31 Dec 1960
"Personal integrity is knowing what you know. What you know is what you know and to have the courage to know and say what you have observed".- LRH from Personal Integrity
"It is necessary to happiness of man, that he be mentally faithful to himself. Infidelity does not consist in believing, or in disbelieving; it consists of professing to believe what he does not believe." Thomas Paine
“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” - Martin Luther King
“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.” - Martin Luther King
“There comes a time when silence is betrayal.” - Martin Luther King Jr.
“Communication is the universal solvent” - L Ron Hubbard
“When men yield up the privilege of thinking, the last shadow of liberty quits the horizon.” Thomas Paine
"Never be afraid to raise your voice for honesty and truth and compassion against injustice and lying and greed. If people all over the world would do this, it would change the earth." William Faulkner
"The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual's own reason and critical analysis." Dalai Lama

Important Reading

Troublemaker - Leah Remini
Ruthless - Ron Miscavige
Going Clear - Lawrence Wright
Bare Faced Messiah - Russell Miller
Counterfeit Dreams - Jeff Hawkins
Blown For Good - Marc Headley
Abuse at the Top - Amy Scobee
Unbreakable Miss Lovely - Tony Ortega
The Church of Fear - John Sweeney
Fair Game - Steve Cannane
Inside Scientology - Janet Reitman
Jenna Miscavige - Beyond Belief
My Billion Year Contract
Ron the War Hero - Chris Owen

Popular Posts

Scientology Photoshops Audience
Tommy Davis and Jessica Feshbach
Shelly Miscavige- Why She Stays
Disconnection and My Mother
Food for Thought
  • David Miscavige Paranoia
    The Church of Spin
    Correspondent from the Bay Area
    Actors Needed to Play Scientologists
  • Recent Comments

    • Linear13 on Thursday Funnies: “Elbert Hubbard was the quintessential opposite of L Ron Hubbard. Elbert must be rolling over in his watery grave knowing…” Feb 3, 13:07
    • Alcoboy on Regraded Being: “Good point, Aqua. The whole thing of eat loads of protein before auditing is simply another example of LRH not…” Feb 3, 13:07
    • Doug Sprinkle on Regraded Being: “Do they disseminate to people on the street anymore? The last several years I have walked around Big Blue twice,…” Feb 3, 12:43
    • Cindy on Tony Mo is Back!: “Wow you’re acting like I condone his actions. I don’t. My only point was had he gotten medical help for…” Feb 3, 12:12
    • Dalton on Regraded Being: “…Arslycus… 🤣” Feb 3, 12:07
    • unelectedfloofgoofer on Regraded Being: “The worst part is they’ll never realize how lucky they were not to get in the van while they’re being…” Feb 3, 11:29
    • Yawn on Regraded Being: “RB you’ve created a communication/language phenomenon with this one, but it sure puts Scientology think on the table and I…” Feb 3, 10:57
    • vǝda on Regraded Being: “Hi, everyone. Speaking of Ruins, I figure that I should probably introduce myself. My name is vǝda (vä’də). While I’m…” Feb 3, 10:56
    • Glenn on Thursday Funnies: “Wow! Thanks for that story Aquamarine. A lot like my friend who got refused. Very able, well trained already and…” Feb 3, 10:19
    • SL1978 on Regraded Being: “The amount of “cloud fogginess” these guys display is unfortunately all too real. Keep those TR’s in boys.” Feb 3, 09:52

    Check out MRinder.com

    Categories

    Archives

    Copyright © 2023 Mike Rinder · WordPress · Log in