Tony Ortega has some excellent material on his blog today about the opening of the SuMP.
A few other/additional/redundant thoughts on this subject.
First, one of the more insane emails ever to come my way, Pasadena org sent this out at 8 pm on Friday night to let everyone know to come to the org at 7am the following morning because “course starts at 8am” — the most important thing about the most important event in the history of scientology, in fact the entire universe, is to keep those student points up and NOT MISS A MINUTE of your “enhancement”!
Of course, the email also contains the typical hype about this being the “biggest grand opening in Scientology history…”
From: Pasadena Org
Sent: May 27, 2016 8:18 PM
Subject: SPECIAL WEEKEND COURSES AND BREAKFAST RSVP
I want to talk to you about Scientology Media Productions!!
The first thing to realize is that this is the biggest Grand Opening in Scientology history. In fact, it is not just a Grand Opening, but a full WEEKEND showcase of our international dissemination strategy.
If you pull out International Scientology News Issue 66, you will see that Scientology Media Productions is our FINAL element in our Global Dissemination Strategy.
It started with the means to provide LRH materials in every language to all peoples of Earth — Bridge and New Era Publications!
Then was the means to provide print dissemination materials in likewise any format or language, in volume, at the press of a button — the Dissemination and Distribution Center!
And, of course, Scientology Media Productions is that final element, allowing us to reach, by ANY conceivable media channel, in any language, a full 90% of Earth’s population — a whole new order of magnitude!
EVERY LA Scientologist needs to be there! We want you to be there and we also want to make sure that you also DO NOT MISS A MINUTE of your enhancement!
SO we have a special schedule for you!
Starting at 7am we will have a special breakfast to launch this historic day for staff and public!
Course starts at 8am and continues to 11:30am
The course rooms close at 11:30am to give you enough time to park and take the shuttle to the event.
The course rooms will re-open for delivery at 7:00pm until 9:30pm.
See you Saturday!!! RSVP to Lupe FCS Fnd.
On Monday join us for lunch at 12:00 to 1:00pm in celebration of Memorial day.
Please RSVP with Tess Field Control Sec.
Thank you See you here at you Beautiful Pasadena Ideal Org.
Here is something I happened to come across published by Freedom magazine in response to the Tampa Bay Times Truth Rundown series in 2009.
Just compare the hype about this being the “international dissemination center for the entire scientology religion” and the “state-of-the-art”iness of it and the stupid numbers (including “international broadcast events”) to what they are now saying about SuMP (Today Golden Era is a footnote — “our film studio” and lket’s not forget “worker’s paradise.”
And here is the purple prose that appeared on the scientology.org website almost before the ribbon had been yanked.
The lying has become so blatant I think nobody even cares any longer. The photos they showed (which you can see at the Underground Bunker) do not come anywhere close to 10,000 people in attendance. They had an “exact number” for the ribbon yanking of the SP building — also a complete lie — but this is LESS than that.
But ask yourself for a minute — even if there WERE 10,000 people at the “largest scientology event in history” this is the same as the number of people who were present for the 1993 IAS event at the LA Sports Arena (and you can see the video of the people there and it is WAAAAAAY more than the same “more than 10,000” at the SuMP. So, in 23 years of unprecedented expansion, even by their OWN lies, they have the same number as the event in 1993.
But there is another comparison to a ribbon yanking event in Los Angeles that everyone seems to have forgotten. The 1997 grand opening of L. Ron Hubbard Way. Back in those days, the claims of 7000 in attendance were probably more accurate, even if somewhat inflated. Though I can only find one small crowd shot, it alone demonstrates there were more people present than at the SuMP extravaganza.
But why is this event “forgotten”? Because the man front and center for the church was Heber Jentzsch. Dave was merely a sideline character. This is take from Freedom magazine:
And by the way Dave, the “dignitaries” have certainly reduced in stature. Remember the good old days when Heber could get a representative from the Los Angeles Mayor’s Office, the California Governor’s Office, the President of the LA City Council and the Sheriff of LA County to show up?
Now, for the biggest even in scientology history you managed: the president of the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce, the President of the Los Angeles Conservancy (whatever that is?), “a” Los Angeles Police captain from the Northeast Division and the director of the Los Angeles City Film and TV Office. What a line-up.
And where was John Travolta and Kirstie Alley? Let alone Tom Cruise?
Yes Dave, scientology IS in the news. In a big way. Every day. You are the butt of numerous jokes. Your dad is everywhere. Louis Theroux has yet to hit the airwaves. There are more shows being worked on. But if media interest is such an important point, why were there NO MEDIA present at the opening? Given your fascination with the media, and reaching audiences on TV and radio and the internet — your stated purpose for this entire boondoggle — why didn’t you take this opportunity to open your doors to the media to satiate their desire to cover scientology?
Then just a short note about some of the crazy statistics fun that has become the Miscavige trademark.
Searching for the “meaning of life” every 5 seconds? That is less than the number of searches done for organic cat litter or one-eyed oriental lesbian hookers. And because a few people a day are searching for the meaning of life, what makes you think they are going to have any interest in your thoroughly discredited subject?
And those average young adults “spending 10 hours a day on the internet” are NOT your public Dave. Not even close. Those people ARE internet savvy. They are on snapchat and instagram and your new studio isn’t going to do ANYTHING to reach those people and even if you did — they are already inured to your bs pitches. Frankly, these are the LEAST LIKELY people to ever fall for scientology. Stick to the young adults in rural Siberia and Venezuela who will join the Sea Org in order to get out of their country and the promise of rice and beans and a roof over their head. They are NOT on internet 10 hours a day, so you have a chance with them.
And you know the people watching TV are watching The Path and SNL takedowns and Going Clear and everything else out there that exposes the lies and abuses of scientology don’t you?
We all knew of course there would be statistics. Idiot statistics. And here we have miles of cable and gigs of storage space. He just cannot resist it.
Dave, if hardware (MEST to you) like miles of fiber optic cable or gigs of storage meant anything in the real world, RadioShack would still be going strong. They had tons of it.
And finally, the old trope that is trotted out by Miscavige at every ribbon yanking. A lie he has told over and over with a straight face — this building is a “gift to the community.” What he really means is that if we see an opportunity to make a video to gain some PR for ourselves, we might allow some limited use of the facilities as long as we control every aspect of it and you all wear yellow arm-bands issued by OSA.
“the average young adult spends 10 hours of every day on the Internet, … (blah… blah… blah…)
SMP will harness the power of every social media outlet imaginable to provide the answers”
Anonymous did that over 8 years ago. That didn’t work out so well for you. Hope you don’t mind those average young adults wearing Guy Fawkes masks when they show up at the orgs.
Dave, you ain’t going to win the internet. In fact, you’ve already lost – best to abandon ship.
Mike Wynski says
Well, this proves that there are hardly ANY people left in the cult. NOT counting staff, MAYBE 10,000 in the entire world. MAYBE 700 active outside the CoS (in North America), probably closer to 300.
It is a body recently laid on the slab at the morgue. Yes, there are some cells in a dead body that take longer to die than the body as a whole but, they will never reanimate the body
I’m thinking that with all the fanfare and bombast to the Sheeple about how SuMP is going to be “the thing” to finally clear the planet and blah blah blah – after the whoopdeedo dies down about this, and the orgs are still empty, I’d say that the Sheeple really will start to have serious questions about the Scientology brand. Because there isn’t anyone half alive in the USA who doesn’t believe in the power of mass media, and that what SuMP is purporting to be, Scientology’s mass media to the entire world.
one of the difficulties in this is the insularity of orgs.
If you’re in a Class V org, you only know THAT org unless you travel to other orgs.
We sit in metal folding chairs at events and watch Ideal Orgs open with great fanfare, but we don’t hear from them later. We don’t see the stat graphs. There are no vids of the empty course rooms.
I know IIII would wonder about them. As I’ve mentioned, I wasn’t onboard with the Ideal Org strat and knew it to be off policy and wrong headed. I’m quite sure I was not unique in this.
But again, under no circumstance do you get together with your friends over plates of double dipped carrots…. to muse aloud on how the other older Ideal Orgs are doing, why there are no stats or news of them, and you don’t chatter and quote the exact policy/tech violations of the strat.
If you ARE in an ideal org and the Field of Dreams hasn’t brought them in running, well you have all the old stand-by excuses. It’s the SPs, it’s the lack of field participation, it’s the next program that will fix things, and so on.
The greatest ability SCN imparts is the ability to rationalize inconsistencies about it.
There will always be shiney videos of Big Things Happening in other far away places…
or at least…for awhile…..
As Scios we always had The Next Big Thing coming to rescue us on the horizon. SuMP failure will be internalized, adjusted, rationalized and moved on from.
That’s my 2 cents worth this lovely AM.
Ann B Watson says
Hi secretfornow, I love reading your 2 cents the other day here. You make a very valid point about rationizing inconsistencies in Cos.By my third Sea Org week,I could start to see Ron’s do as I say not as I do policy coming out.Love U Always.
Morning Ann…:) Yes – I am becoming more and more cognizant of the constant stream we dealt with. Whack-a-Mole was a way of life.
I’m constantly experiencing waves of relief to be out.
The Los Angeles Conservancy seeks to save historically significant buildings. As long as Scientology also does this, I think they can count on the president of the Conservancy being present at their ribbon yankings.
Actually, they did highlight an example of the high tech production. Didn’t you see the Periscope edition? 🙂
The opening of SuMP is another nail in the Co$ coffin. Even if they were to broadcast stuff, late-night comedians would mine it for laughs— LOTS of laughs. I know WE will mine it for laughs, ridicule, and degradation. As if it could be degraded any further…….AAROOOOOOOOO!
*settles in. *munches popcorn.
I don’t care about this stupid event.
I just came here to crow and chortle and delight on the fact that…..
“I’m OUT I’m OUT I’m OUT!”
and I didn’t have to go to any stupid event and pretend to be happy and clap and try not to fall asleep and slip around to avoid the regging and whatever new crap was being flogged.
Do you know,…I was at GAT II and saw the new meter, thought it looked like shyte, and actually had the balls to tell the sales person that I thought it was ugly and I wouldn’t buy one, that I “loved my meter, the one that’d taken me thru OT III”. … and figured it’d be a hard sell to get people to buy that sh*tty looking thing. No one was going to buy that. And they all look the same? And you can’t pick a color? They’re ALL silver grey? Gooood luck!”
NOT knowing that we’d walk into the course room in 48 hours only to find that the ten grand in meters we owned (one to use, one for back-up) was fully lost, that only the new ones would work with the new simulators and play-back recorders. That we’d be FORCED to buy a new one ON THE SPOT – (five freakin grand) …… NO training without it.
*( you wouldn’t believe the pressure with GAT II – any indication of “WTF! “was met with a laser-like vicious and piercing questioning about ones’ allegiance to Standard Tech, LRH, COB and RTC.)
So today I’ll just rejoice that I didn’t go to the stupid new event, bought nothing but a a bottle of wine, and don’t give a tin-sh*t about any of it
I’m so bloody happy.
aaaand…when I got a call about going to the even the other night, I just laughed at the fella. Full on laughed. I could get away with it, bein sooooo far away. (yeah, I’ll hop a last-minute plane on YOUR recommendation)
to H*ll with them.
Great post, Secretfornow. I’m tracking with you. Am I ever!
Ann B Watson says
Hi secretfornow,A tremendous rock splitting post! Tonight I will toast you with my glass of zin.You are OUT and if I had been forced to look at the atrociously designed e-meter,there would be e-meter parts on the floor if I was told to pay cash or whatever the regges pull out of you,to buy a new piece of s###! Insane!!XO
When I reached the point of just DONE, I threw everything away. I took my trusty old meter outside and just put it in the garbage bin. It had meant so much and had so many stories and figured so brightly in my life, and with NOT ONE thought of hesitation I threw it in the bin.
I wasn’t about to try to sell it or give it away. Nothing I had was going to end up in anyone’s hands for any reason.
Yep, the single biggest release one attains in $cientology is the one when you fully exteriorize from the organization.
…aaaaaand the “tech”.
someday …..we’re gonna sit down.
Gus Cox says
Yes, it sounds like you are having a great day too! I’m making some hot dogs and having a nice cold beer (although I had to get a fresh one when I read, “That is less than the number of searches done for organic cat litter or one-eyed oriental lesbian hookers,” because a sprayed half of it on my keyboard laughing!).
I don’t give a tin shit about any of it either! Cheers, life is good!
one of the biggest gifts of Out … is the long lost return of the lack of urgency.
no longer is there a the Sword of Damocles hanging over me, my every action or inaction, thought or lack of awareness imperiling my eternity.
It’s just Barbeques and kittens from here on out.
Tin Shit. New. Favorite. Term. Cheers to you on your escape to reality. Be kind to yourself as the changes come in swift succession. They’re not all quite Barbeques and kittens, but yeah, mostly barbecues and kittens.
you are right.
I could get mired down in the wasted years, money, children I didn’t have, life I didn’t lead. On being duped, stupid, gullible, low hanging fruit, on the harm I did by bringing others in, on the loss of the hope of eternity and flying and all the magic stuff.
But since my exit was precipitated by a long drawn out handling that brought me to the brink of full insanity, loss and despair….
I don’t look. I don’t think. I don’t doubt. I don’t look back. I just shed shed shed shed.
There is nothing wrong with me. I am a perfect normal air-breather no different or better than anyone else. I’m just me and happy. I’m going to keep being this way because I want to.
I’m doing whatever I want whenever I want.
and thank you again for your support.
If I didn’t have to be UTR I’d found a support group and go to great lengths for many years to help others out and coming out. You guys are a god-send.
Ann B Watson says
Hi secretfornow, You are a godsend to me.I could not have kids either.
.Emergency hysterectomy nearly got me in 91. Five transfusions.
So I love doggies,kitties,roses and ALL of YOU.XO
Exactly how I feel, Secretfornow. No more stupid events, as you say, no more ducking regges, surveyors to whom I have to talk in superlatives, avoiding the tasteless eats (same old, same old everytime, no variety), and cold coffee of a brand I refuse to keep at home! No more late starts, three and a half hours on uncomfortable chairs, freezing my butt off because it’s winter, getting home late on dark, miserable roads – and by lunchtime the next day, I can’t remember what it was all about!
You speak for all of us, I’m sure.
THIS event will start On Time.
nooo..we mean it.
This time for sure!
(I wish I could insert a gif here, if I could it’d be Lucy holding the football for Charlie Brown)
A post like this saves my day (and my week and my month). Thank you and wellcome in the free world!
that’s amazing. and wonderful. 🙂 🙂 Thank you.
David Miscavige has become nothing more than a collector. some people collect Star Wars figurines, some cars, he collects empty buildings. if nothing is ever produced out of SUMP, all the better… as any collector knows, its value immediately decreases when you open the packaging.
Stupid question: What are they going to show/play/broadcast? The PDC tapes? There is only a handful of LRH tapes that I think could maybe work for raw public consumption. Are they going to conduct interviews with JT and Kirstie and TC.
I just don’t see what they are going to put on the air. What am I missing?
cheeezy chhhheeeezy cheeezy videos. Oh lawd can’t’cha feel the cheese coming our way?
Chee Chalker says
I understand why Travolta avoided the $hitStorm that was the SuMP (pump) opening (no love lost between JT and COB…I’m sure JT is aware of what COB says about him (JT) behind Travolta’s back.)
And I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that TC was at the event, but hid inside to avoid being photographed at a scientology event.
What I am really surprised about is no Krusty, no Elfmans, no Mastersons (actual Mastersons and also Reaiches who use the Masterson name tonget ahead in Hollywood) and no Prepon.
They (as far as we know) as still in the cult, I mean, still believe COB has the heart of a lion (albiet a cowardly one). Where were they?
And why wasn’t Kate Cebrano there as she was almost 20 years ago?
Where was the new Kate, i.e. Stacey Francis?
Sure, the scientology Solid Gold dancers looked great, but was that it?
Where were all the artists? Wasn’t this built to help promote their talent?
So many questions, but since I have been blocked by Scientology and many of their ‘celebrity’ members on Twitter, I cannot reach out to ask them.
I posted this over at the Underground Bunker, but I wanted to make sure that the OSAbots who read this blog are aware that Jim Meskimen’s mother is PTS….she went to a psychiatrist and was helped by it.
I just hope Jim disconnects from his lovely octogenarian mother because of the danger she poses. Or, perhaps if Jim is extensively sec checked or if he moves up in status ($$) all can be forgiven.
Does poor Marion Ross not know about Farsec??
Can’t wait for the new shows to appear: Keeping Up with the Cash Grab, Game of Shills, Teletologists, Falling Stats, Super Oatieeight, Regges and Beyond (in space no-one can hear the cash registers), The Demento and Poww No Show Hour, The Weekly Org Telethon, I Love Demento Reality Show hosted by Sherman, just to name a few.
“Real Cultwives of Beverly Hills”? “Keeping Up With The Cardones”? “Severe Reality Adjustment: the David Miscavige Show”?
Ann B Watson says
Hi Kronomex, Laughed so much with your post.Great! I have one more show title.Revolting in the Stars with your lead crack unit of slaves right here at SUMP.Looking Bad for bid ratings! XO
Ann B Watson says
Hi Kronomex, Edit Ann looking bad for big ratings.xo
My favorite quote from the Scientology website, ever:
“Yes, Scientology is in the news—that’s certainly proof that the religion is so interesting. But now Scientology Media Productions IS the media.”
“…that’s certainly proof that the religion is so interesting…”
What an insincere pile of bullshit; have you ever heard a line of print ever sound like more of a desperate, inward plea towards its constituency?
I hope whoever wrote this gets fired because it’s just laughably bad and almost purposefully vague.
All I’m saying is that if I had wrote that on a middle school essay, the teacher would’ve failed my paper and my poor pensmanship. Yet this is the work of the best writer/editor in the whole of the “fastest growing religion on Earth”?
Also, I love how they aren’t even trying to sell you on Scientology anymore, just how interesting it is.
You know what’s interesting, David, the countless tales of your disconnection policy in action and the fact your organization is still tax-exempt.
…….right up until the end…there will be that last lasaaaaast person, squealing out the crack in the door as it’s closed for non-payment of bloated utilities….
”we’re going to clear the planet! we’re the hope of mankind!”
A media center touted by Miscavige for its media production capabilities and the very first production done by the new facility is…a live reading of Battlefield Earth. Not a video or a movie to highlight the video production, or a song or podcast to highlight the radio production. Heck, Daveyboy couldn’t even tell the flock that he had secured licenses to broadcast on radio or television. Nope, the first production was a live reading of Battlefield Earth featuring Z-lister Jim Meskimen. How 21st century. I’ll wait for the cassette tape so I can pop it into my walkman.
And sorry, no John Travolta for this version of Battlefield Earth (thank all that is good Forrest Whitaker latched onto Rogue One to get that BE stench off his career) Not even Nancy Cartwright, the self-proclaimed Valley Princess Warrior Governor something-something showed up for this. What’s up with that? How about the Elfmans? Erika Christensen? The Smiths? Tom Cruise? No, no, no, and…no.
The most high-tech thing in Scientology is their use of wide-angle lenses and photoshop to make their crowds look bigger. 10,000 my ass.
A live reading of Battlefield Earth by Jim Meskiman…you can’t be serious.
Bob Eckert says
They also had Emily Watson reading. That’s the daughter of Phil and Willie Jones, who have been embarassing CoS mightily with their Call Me billboard, replicated on signs, flyers, and cars at the SMP protests. It came across like a proof-of-life from a hostage-taker.
tony b says
Edge: With all the demands of our new building going on you may have to wait a while for your personal leather bound cassette recording of Batty Earth to be shipped. But send in your order and prepay it so that you have priority service immediately the cassette production line has been set up. Meanwhile – good news! – the 8 track line is in full swing and almost ready to send expedited tapes to those who have fully paid the express delivery charges. You should receive a poster to that effect to which we will add the time and date as they are firmed up and when my extended visit to Gold Base for retraining is complete. .
2 i/c Globular Disemination
Anonymous lurker says
FYI: The Los Angeles Conservancy is a legit, non-governmental group dedicated to preserving historic buildings and built environments in LA. The studio The CoS bought has a long history (it may go back as far as the silent days) and if the CoS has restored or preserved original parts of the complex with some architectural sensitivity, the conservancy would want to praise that act of preservation. (Other important early film studios were in the same neighborhood–including Disney and DW Griffith—and were torn down in favor of supermarkets and parking lots.) I’m sure that’s why the Conservancy woman was there, not to endorse Scientology except as they treated the buildings.
good to know. Thanks.
Buber Zionist (@buberzionist) says
Why no Tom Cruise?
Michael Doyle says
Organic kitty litter and a eyed lesbian hooker… CLASSIC !
Murray Luther says
All of the dissemination resources in the world won’t change the fact that COS products and services are things that are very little in demand. Media is not senior to marketing. And for whatever PR they will try to exploit, that ship has long sailed. And all of the dissemination resources in the world won’t change the fact that COS PR is has lost credibility beyond repair. As the public continues to “wise up,” the COS is left with nothing but their comical and inimitable brand of propaganda. Even Joseph Goebbels’ Ministry of Enlightenment and Propaganda owned and controlled their national media. All the COS will have is some streaming online PR puffery to continue placating their deluded loyalists. Except now there will be more of it.
Scott Henderson says
Has anyone watched the Animal Planet docufiction Mermaids:The Body Found? An inane attempt to mislead viewers – and generate ratings – by presenting as “fact” that mermaids not only exist but the US Government has hidden this from the public eye, using actors masquerading as former NOAA employees and shadowy governments agents. It is not until the closing credits that a small disclaimer reveals that this is a work of fiction. Laughable indeed, however enough of the public was deceived that NOAA had to issue an official rebuttal.
Just a gut feeling but I seriously doubt it won’t be long before Davey and his ilk produce something in a similar vein and for a similar purpose – to mislead the gullible.
Where’s my popcorn?
Leslie Bates says
So how many Sea Org members who had to dress as civilians got to escape?
I’m a third through chapter 6, a junior prom with some Mossad and IDF action.
As ordered by the Primary the Star Command began a search of the records for the Awakened Being who put down the hijacking of Flight 23.
It began at the Eternal Truth Center on Lake Street in Minneapolis.
No one fitting the description of the teenage boy had ever reached the status of Awakened Being at the Minneapolis Center.
The search moved on to the Chicago Center.
The records of other centers in the Midwest were searched.
The search now spread to centers in the rest of the United States and Canada. With it came the fear of punishment for failure. The Primary could not understand how a record of an awakening was lost.
The search now moved to the United Kingdom along with the rest of the English speaking world. And in final desperation Asia, Africa, and Latin America were also searched.
For the Church of Eternal Truth it was impossible for anyone to awaken without their training. Those who failed to find the boy were subject to punishment. The most common punishment was the loss of rank in the Star Command along with their position on The Way of Being. The personnel subject to punishment were required to do compensation projects and to repeat training procedures.
Robert Lee Herald, standing under the clear night sky outside his office at the Primary Base in California, stared out into the desert.
Somewhere in the world was an Awakened Being who was not under his command.
Gary "Jackson" Morehead says
I’m just say’n…. Freedom Mag states Gold Base has living facilities for 900 plus staff in 2009….
Testimonial Videos of 2016 produced by CSI against it’s own leaders Father over and over state there are 475 staff on the Gold Base.
Where did half of the staff go Dave??
Human Trafficking, or do you not count those in the hole as having access to living accommodations??
I’m just say’n…..
You are a turd dressed in a nice suit.
Jesus the amount of lies this “ecclesiastical” leader puts forth….
Such luxurious bedrooms and bedding for the staff. What another whopping lie! That’ll be the day.
Jose Chung says
24 hours of David Mscavige sitting on a Lazy Boy chair talking non stop
about Pyramids for weeks on end. stopping only to scream for money.
Rev.Gene Scott it was funny and made money, David Miscavige I don’t think so.
.Gold Base failed because D.M. also built a torture chamber for SO exec’s in the same place
this is no Band Aid fix and on Sunset Blvd.???????
I’m going back to watching 24 hour Bull fights on Sat TV.
Old Surfer Dude says
10,000 Scientologists at the SuMP event? Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle! I learned something new today! I had no idea that fully half of all Scientologists on Teegeeack live in and around the the greater L.A. area! No wonder all the Idle Morgues outside of Southern California, don’t have very many students! Apparently, they’re all here! Imagine that! Half of ALL Scientologists in the world are right in our backyard! Who would of thunk it…
Jose Chung says
there were 1,000 chairs and nobody got caught Lap dancing.
Pasadena Org made it an ALL Hands emergency plus screen actors guild extras
and SO staff in civilian cloths and Attendance police , maybe most chairs had a body in it.
Doug Sprinkle says
OSD are you going to make a surfing video for SUMP? It would be a good way to introduce Wog surfers to LRH surfing tech.
Old Surfer Dude says
LRH’s Surfing Tech was found by the dwarf in some locked storage locker. However, you have to be taller than 5’2″ to participate in the rundown.
The problem with this ribbon cutting as opposed to an Ideal Org ribbon cutting is that while the org is allowed to fade from our memory the next day and forever, Scientology Media Productions has us awaiting and awaiting for something…ANYTHING! Let us see if it delivers a few feeble little offerings at least but this is a backfire. It merely spotlights the truth that scientology is all washed up, it’s a has-been. It won’t play, it’s box-office poison in tinsel town. Is it any wonder the celebrities didn’t show?
“…27 miles of fiber optic cable…super computers with a combined capacity of 3.2 million gigabtypes of information…”
hehehe…they opened an Amazon Web Services account.
I Yawnalot says
This is going to be interesting. Isn’t broadcasting a heavily controlled industry/activity? It sure is here in Aus. Won’t every statistic, content rating, wavelength & power usage, range etc be monitored in real time by authorities and watchdogs of some sort. Seems to me Davy is setting himself up to be even more caught out by his lies. Now he’s going to broadcast them extensively. We all know he’ll micro-manage every broadcast within an inch of its life. He believes in his own mastery of dribble anyway the nut case that he is, but I reckon, like all things Scientology it will turn around and bite them.
This SuMP might just turn out to be a good thing. At the very least every Scientologist is now set up for another monumental WTF loss when the masses don’t flood into the orgs. Time is not a friendly thing for Scientologists – nothing happens in it for them except unfulfilled expectations.
Broadcasting is regulated here in the US, but it’s not heavily controlled or monitored by the government. The FCC isn’t really in the job of regulating per se when it comes to programming. Broadcast licenses, yes, but that’s about as far as they go, and that’s only for the use of the broadcast spectrum. We take the First Amendment pretty seriously here. That why we didn’t attempt to censor the entire Internet like you guys did a few years ago, or try to implement a ban on “small breasts” out of some misguided attempt to combat pedophilia.
Why, yes, we are better at some things than Ausfailia.
I Yawnalot says
Thanks for that. And yes, Australia has lost itself in bureaucratic nonsense and it’s only going to get worse with ‘create more officialism’ being the number one game in Government. But we make up for some failings in other more meaningful ways, like a medical system that kinda of works for everyone at little to no cost (bare bones stuff mostly) but if you really need it for something that ails you, it’s there. The beer is still good and the beaches clean for the most part (particularly away from Sydney Harbor) with pretty regular good surf. Where I live the fishing is great and I eat the oysters straight from the rocks & catch mud crabs and prawns (shrimp) in summer – no pollution and very few people – wouldn’t live anywhere else, even if I could afford to.
Elegant Mess says
*snort* “3.2 million gigabytes of information.” That’s about 3,200 Terabytes. So what? You got a bunch of external hard drives. Whoopee.
Also, as a resident of the Silverlake community, I’m still waiting to see what “gifts” the church intends to bestow upon us. So far, it’s been a traffic jam on Sunset and a 1/2 mile pedestrian detour around that event, yesterday. Can’t wait to see what they’ll do next.
And he claims that all that storage capacity has something to do with “super computers.” What a crock. There is no reason that a video production facility would have need of an actual supercomputer, nor would Miscavige have on staff the expertise to operate one. Is Scientology now doing climate modeling or oil exploration?
Mike Wynski says
I have 1TB of storage on my key chain (I carry around my music). Only cost me a few dollars. The CoS has always been behind the tech curve. I remember around ’88 an exec from INCOMM contacted me to find out what a RDBMS was! This was almost a decade after commercial versions hit the market.
Let’s hope that true believers in $cientology start looking for the “scientology channel” on TV, cable, or radio. When they don’t find it, they will know it was a scam. Another footbullet for David Miscavige!
Old Surfer Dude says
Yeah, but, will they have cartoons? As long as they have cartoons I’ll tune in…
Regraded Being every week would be appropriate cartoon broadcast material for them
OSD…They ARE a cartoon
Old Surfer Dude says
Wow! I’m living in a cartoon put on by the dwarf. Similar to what i experienced while attending SDSU…..
What’s immensely sad and pathetic is even if they know deep down it’s a scam – like all the rest of it – they’ll quickly bury those thoughts and make excuses and justifications for why SMP is delivering absolutely nothing and having zero impact on the world.
Just think. All his loyal minions will be able to tune in to radio and TV 24/7 to hear paid actors sing COB”s praises. I wonder if the plan is to insist that each and every $cientologist has a special television installed in every room of their home so that big brother Dave can turn it on from central HQ. That way every loyal minion can be updated on a regular basis when more money is needed for whatever. COB himself will wake them every morning at 7am with the usual invectives. How joyful would that be?
No other stations than official stations will, of course, be permitted.
And don’t forget, it’s a two-way TV, and not-so-big brother will be watching YOU 24/7.
When sci-fi 1984 meets reality in 2016.
“one-eyed oriental lesbian hookers”
***not that there’s anything wrong with that…
Old Surfer Dude says
HEY!!! You leave my sister out of this!!!
April Holiday says
I nearly choked on my Coca Cola when I read that. Good one Mike.
Natural Philosopher says
Garbage in, garbage out, the garbage flows along fibre optic cables for greater distances and speeds than before. Maybe the 27 miles of fible cable travels round and around with only one outlet filtered by OSA. Who are they kidding! Not one radio program, web broadcast or TV program output after the grand opening???? What’s the product Dave? PR? Local Goodwill? Or a property asset you can sell to the highest bidder when your ponzi scam is finally exposed?
At the end of the day, this all makes no difference. Scientology is shrinking. Old Scientologists are dying. It’s becoming basically impossible to convince westerners to join. David Miscavige is an idiot – not just a shitty person but a terrible “leader,” as proved by his “stats” – and his monotonous delivery is not going to be enough to pull the wool over people’s eyes forever. He knows it, I think, His abysmal speech at Atlanta just screamed of desperation. No doubt his food-salad-waffle-fest of a speech in Hollywood was worse.
And where were the stars? NOWHERE!
Miscavige can’t even convince Hollywood actors to turn up, because an affiliation with the Church of Scientology has proven to be poison. So what, he starts up this bullshit t media TV station. For what? To disseminate? Wake up you fools! You don’t need a TV station. You don’t even need super expensive cameras. You don’t need to spend millions on equipment.
What do you need? CONTENT that people BELIEVE IN. And guess what, Scientology AIN’T IT.
And here is the problem. Scientology is bullshit heavy and content-free.
You know who has a FAR better chance of “clearing the planet?” PewdiePie. He’s a Scandinavian who videos himself playing video games (look him up). He has 44,665,805 subscribers on Youtube. With nothing more than a laptop and a webcam. 44,665,805. That is 1500 times the number of followers Scientology has (if we generously give them 30000 followers).
Scientology is dead. And no one is going to bring it back from the (m)org..
David Miscavige has to continue to flog this dead horse because that’s all he knows how to do. Even if he does his job with such blinding incompetence. Yet eventually Miscavige will die. And so will Scientology.
SuMP will do nothing to change that inevitability.
Well, the Toxic Dwarf is right in one respect: the SuMP is a gift to the community. The community of late-night shows, stand-up comics, critics of all stripes, and probably Rifftrax, that is. Because every single little wet fart that comes out of that place will be viewed, analyzed, and ripped to shreds within minutes of being broadcast by whatever medium they choose. Yes, they have control of their own media (and always have since Gold was built). They have no control whatsoever over what happens after it’s broadcast. Any and all DMCAs will be laughed at, citing Fair Use. They dare not use the SuMP for the purpose it was opened for. Of course, they dare not admit that the market for one-eyed oriental lesbian hookers, as Mike stated, is greater than their membership of less than twenty thousand and shrinking.
Too bad John Oliver is on a repeat this week. I’d love to hear what he’d say about this.
Old Surfer Dude says
Soon, Espi. Very soon. John Oliver will return with his guns drawn…
I adore John Oliver. He’s hysterically funny! I really wish he’d do longer segments on $cientology, though. I’ve only ever seen him make a few comments here and there.
A brand-new state of the art media facility and they couldn’t arrange a video link-up to Cruise so he could take part in the celebrations? They aren’t even trying any more.
“..religious programming of all faiths..”
Yeah right Dave. ROFL! I’m guessing your boring ass speech didn’t mention the pesky little fact that you have no broadcast license. Ah well, at least you got your applause fix.
Old Surfer Dude says
What??? No broadcasting license??? Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! Stupid dwarf…
I honestly think he may be cracking up. More so than before that is.
Old Surfer Dude says
Hmmmmmm….That would make him cracking up squared…
Jesus, if David Miscavige reads this blog everyday, he must get a major ass headache.
He already has scotch to provide that. 😛
ed kette says
That was prodigious, humongous, regal, imperial, baronial, Homeric ad infinitum…
Your dedicated leadership has shown all of us what the very best annointed one can achieve!
But, why you forgot the remainder 10% of Earth’s population?
That is not fair!
Long live the inmate!
Too much logic here, does not compute…. aaauuuwtsch!
Ann B Watson says
Hi Mike, I have archived this.One of your Best Ever.Thank you.❤️
Agreed, Ann. Both Mike and Tony decimated the SUMP (defined in my dictionary as a “cesspool”) opening in a major way. No media allowed. (I wonder if any of them asked?) No scio biggies in sight, not even any of the minor whales. No Travolta, Cruise, not even Nancy from over the hill. What a funerial opening Dave achieved.
If the ‘Media Center’ has any ‘media’, why hasn’t any of it been seen by anyone? I know that OTes have control over matter, energy, space and time, so why not electromagnetic waves (or particles if you prefer)? If real physicists can detect neutrinos and gravity waves, why no transmissions from the SuMP?
When someone opens a bridge, they cut a ribbon and the leaders or honored guests drive across in the first car. Where is the first DJ with a $cieno song? Or the first music video?
I must be missing something. Something like gang reging or being stuffed in locker by the ‘cram officer’. On second thought, I would like to miss those things.
They have a song called “Wake Up The World”, which debuted at the circus. However, it’s not online, and they didn’t bother to credit the singers, or even make up a name for the group. (I saw a pic of the performers and someone who looked like a cheerleader in front, on the Co$ site event slide show.)
I did find some songs with that title, but they were about Christianity.
This grand opening is quite pathetic! It was supposed to end suppression and clear the world. So far, one big raspberry.
The fact that none of the silly celebrities were there is insane! Kirstie was tweeting how bored she was the night before and her tweet said she was in Clearwater. Wow. Not even their extreme D-listers showed?!? I’m really surprised actually! With all the hype and hope they’re pinning in this, I would have thought the Jive Aces and Stacy Francis would have put in an appearance! Even Jim Meskimen! Wow and wow!
Well, back to J&D as per usual. Move along. Nothing to see here at SMP! No drowning out here.
Great questions on top of a great review of the event. It really is super lame that they didn’t have something to show off to a crowd of such impressive mass. They couldn’t even manage to simulcast or live stream the opening? No big reveal of a Scio-TV channel? As those TV/internet-addicted kids say, FAIL!!!