Mike Rinder's Blog

Something Can Be Done About It

AOLA is Circling the Drain

By 177 Comments

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You may have noted my mention yesterday that all the “ideal” PAC execs were replaced in one fell swoop.

I guess being “ideal” doesn’t mean much after all. Of course it IS the brilliant COB strategy for clearing the planet, but any way you slice it, it’s a shit sandwich. The public are bled dry. It is the subject of endless filler material for events and magazines showing empty rooms of CGI “buildings.” But it is especially shitty if you are an executive in one of these “ideal” orgs.  You can imagine the make-wrong “You have a $20 million building and your stats are down? What sort of thanks is that to COB for his brilliance? You are suppressing scientology.”

The problem, at least from a staff perspective, is that the “ideal” org is now kryptonite for any reason for downstats. There is NO excuse — before it’s “well, we are not ideal, so we suck” but once they are ideal and things STILL suck, there is nowhere to hide. No reason, no matter how valid — the finance system prevents staff from being paid, disconnection and fair game has destroyed any goodwill in our community, the golden age of squirrel tech keeps people away in droves, the price of books are too high to sell etc etc — is acceptable in the face of operating in a marbled palace.

But the real point here is the actual state of AOLA.

The latest edition of Advance! magazine tells you everything you need to know.

First, they seem desperate to “revitalize” “OT phenomena.”  Like this will be a panacea for selling shit sandwiches. “Those sandwiches give you magical powers.”

A full 5 pages of the skinny mag are devoted to these stories that belong in Gary Larson’s Far Side cartoon. These things are just goofy.  I scanned a couple of pages to give you some idea. It seems forgetfulness or unawareness translate into OT abilities – forget where your car keys are and you can magically be “OT” when you find them (not so “OT” when you lost them, but you are not supposed to notice), and mundane events in life (a cloud moving) are turned into miracles in the hands of those who have practiced the art of bs writing at “Success Tables” for years.

Interestingly, they don’t seem to have too many of these goofy stories as the print is HUGE (like it’s for an audience of old people) and most of the pages are filled with cheesy sketches.

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But the real story of the demise of the ideal AOLA is found at the back of the magazine where they list the completions.

14 completions on OT I

10 on OT II

7 on OT III

5 on OT IV

3 on OT V

WOW!  People are NOT moving “up the Bridge to OT”, they are falling off the side and into the chasm. An attrition rate of 14 to 3 is pretty awesome.

And note the VOLUME. These stats are for at least 2 months. They produced THREE OT V’s?

That is the ultimate product of AOLA. (They no longer deliver the Class VIII course as you cannot get there as there is no Briefing Course).

Bottom line:  They should not put out this magazine. It is an embarrassment and a bad joke.

But like all things in scientology – they are compelled to do this because “policy” tells them to do so.  Amazing

 

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Comments

  1. Wow – these testimonials are really something. I haven’t really had an accurate understanding of how OT’s think as I’ve never been around any. To think that you can burn holes in clouds by staring at them angrily, or energetically transport your ATM card back into your wallet from behind a vault wall – that takes some real serious delusion.

    What’s really scary is how they must view their power to affect and control other people. I would hate to be a kid of an OT.

    Reply

  2. Execs at PAC were replaced, but not because they were all still there. Many had um……….. whatever.

    PAC is the new “hole”. Miscavige has become very cunning, even beautifully evil. Like a virus that meets it’s vaccine and shape shifts so the vaccine no longer creates a dent. He knows how to mock up a “Hole” so it is not identifiable. Shakedown and break and blow off staff so it all looks so, so, “usual”.

    Reply

  3. Where were those cloud burning OTs back when AOLA Opened in 1998? Truly the tech must have been weak back then! It was raining!? Back in the bronze age of tech?
    See here: http://tonyortega.org/2014/02/28/aolas-grand-re-opening-a-look-at-the-last-time-scientology-cut-the-ribbon-at-big-blue/

    OK, I admit I just needed to Google “AOLA” and the top hit was the Underground bunker with a great picture of Marty Rathbun cutting the ribbon in front of all these umbrella’d attendees!

    Actually this is _my_ “success story”: “So I needed to word clear an M/U on Rinder’s blog. I searched for the answer and BOOM, Google found it. I had cause over Google! – JB” 😛

    Reply

  5. Dave,

    Good to see that you have shitcanned another crop of your handpicked Execs. This puts you closer to being on target for your agenda to hunker PAC into ‘christian science reading room’ mode. You can keep the AOLA and CLO buildings, but the entire block between LRH Way and Catalina must go. You can use the remaining AOLA building for your Window Dressing business model (Pokemon Village of the West Coast).

    White Elephant private equity is salivating to take out the base by the jugular (along with your other neglected properties). The big league sales commission to flip the property to Kaiser will make your IAS commissions look like the small cap minor league that they are. Sorry, but LRH Way will be changed back to Berendo.

    By the way, those fake eyelashes that you ordered Erin to wear to your ‘Gone With the Wind’ rendezvous in Atlanta were a complete overkill. Has Lou been twinned up with Shelly?

    Reply

    • Hi threefeetback, A great post that gave me much laughter.I noticed the eyelashes also.I suppose doing them up helps her maintain that dedicated glare we all know and love.xo Ann.

      Reply

        • Hi Rick Mycroft, Love your posts.Potemkin Village super-detective in that those still in can’t get out freely and super-deflective because those on the outside are most definitely not going to be stopping by for a free personality assessment! I will have to visit Clearwater and walk the empty Florida empire of Scamology myself to feel how empty and hollow it must be.I would hate to be QM in these huge glittering deserted buildings.Who knows I could turn a corner and bump into a hologram of Ron and oh no David’s not far behind.Lol! Xxoo Ann.

          Reply

          • Hi Rick Mycroft, Whoops I forgot the most important part your super Defective because all the Bridge and tech went out with dm’s wash and Ron knew all about the defective bits and let it all continue.Just my opinion on that…xo Ann.

            Reply

  6. The OT success stories are really amusing: Here’s mine: I had a house and I listed it for sale and lo’ and behold, my realtor called me one afternoon and told me that I had an offer and it closed escrow 35 days later! OMG! There’s more! One afternoon, my dog got into a fence war with the neighbors dog (a daily source of entertainment for these two mutts) and hurt his paw. He limped around for the rest of the evening, but I petted him and gave him a treat after dinner and the next day he was fine. Again, Amazing!

    Reply

    • Ryan….Mind.Blown over your wins! LOL – awesome!! 🙂

      Here are some of my wog wins:

      I went to college and gradutated with honors – no clay or word clearing seventeen billion different ways.
      I saved my money, bought a house and have a retirement account.
      I work out and am in good shape.
      I read books and learn w/o a courseroom.
      I don’t go for scams and am not easily conned! Thank you LRH for your cult of Scientology. Without your “tech” Sir, I would have never had the experience of being in one of this Century’s biggest con / scams and criminal evil cults.

      Hip Hip Hooray!! 🙂

      Reply

    • What ? No miraculous parking spaces ?

      Sorry, you can’t be OT without a miraculous parking space story.

      Reply

  7. AOLA and the other Los Angeles Orgs have suffered statcrashes before and always for the same reasons: Namby-pamby execs who refuse to apply KSW; refuse to cancel reasonableness in their area; and refuse to kidnap members of the public and force them to become Scientologists and sign over their life savings.

    Look, it’s just not that hard to make new Scientologists when ecclesiastical kidnapping and torture are used. Most raw meat wogs don’t like being electrocuted, waterboarded, or having their heads put in a vice. So you do those things until they sign on the dotted line and fork over their money. Then you slap them around some more, make them sign a SO contract, and then lock them up in the RPF forever.

    Once you get them in the RPF and have the contract they signed agreeing to be RPF’d then it’s all fully legal and their families can’t do anything about it. We’re a religion and these people agreed to become Scientologists; agreed to sign over all their money on a nonrefundable basis to Scientology; and then agreed to be RPF’d.

    The new SO execs COB has put in Los Angeles are a tough breed of failed Narconon grads from Moscow who have backgrounds as mercenaries and narcotraffickers. They are very persuasive and know how to produce results no matter what.

    These new execs will not be taking no for an answer from raw meat wog publics. Los Angeles must be cleared. This takes a refusal to listen to wogs and their stupid reactive mind justifications for not wanting to be Scientologists. These wogs are already Scientologists and just don’t know it. The tough new “Moscow Management” will R Factor these wogs on this fact and boom LA’s stats in no time.

    Reply

    • Hi OTVIIIisGrrr8, Your post chills me to the bone because it is true.Very frightening.Thank you for your reply to messing your name up.Most sauve and debonair. xo Ann.

      Reply

  9. Jill Carmel should spend more time with her “friends” doing “fun” things, she’d probably have a better time and save money.
    I can just imagine the people at the church telling her that being “distracted” by friends is a bad thing… they’re not having any fun, so why should anyone else?

    Reply

  10. PROBLEMS WITH WEBSITE

    A few people have reported problems with the website over the last few days. It seems to be isolated, as many people have had no trouble.

    Our blog technical guru gave me a little write up, put into the simplest terms, about what to do if you have trouble seeing or accessing the site:

    When this blog does not seem to be displaying correctly, the first thing to try is to do a forced reload of the page. That is done with Control-R.

    If that doesn’t handle you probably need to empty your browser’s “cache.” The cache is where pages that you have previously visited are stored (your browsing history). Sometimes older problem pages hang up there.

    The purpose of the cache is to allow the browser to show previously visited pages faster by not having to fully reload them each time you go to them. This is normally a great thing as it speeds browsing.

    What to do when you need to empty you cache:

    Chrome: go to Settings, then to Advanced Settings, then Clear Browsing Data, then make sure Cached Images & Files is selected, then click Clear.

    Internet Explorer: go to Settings, then General, then delete Browsing History.

    Firefox: go to Options, Privacy, then clear your recent history.

    (Safari is similar, but no longer have a mac to check)

    Reply

    • Hi Mike, I love you but your little cousin is lost in the tech jargon woods. I do not have chrome just Apple stuff and they are tight with their security. My sit is the cannot open safari & the cut & paste antics that do not respond to conventional means.All I am trying to do is access your blog because it gives me peace and security.And because you and Christie are the bomb! Love y’all Ann.

      Reply

    • Here’s the how to clear Safari’s website data
      I wasn’t bit by the bug, but I do know my Macs.

      Top menu bar: Safari -> Preferences…
      Click the Privacy tab
      Wait for the “Details…” button to appear (it takes a minute)
      Search for “mikerindersblog.org”
      Click on it to select it, click the Remove Button
      That’ll remove the cache and cookies for this site.
      Quit and relaunch Safari for good measure

      Hopefully that’d do it… YMMV (your mileage may vary 🙂

      Reply

    • Last week or so, I was copying something from a post and the size of the print reduced to very small. I thought it would rectify itself when the computer was rebooted. It hasn’t!

      Anyone know how I can get the font back to its normal size. HELP!

      Reply

      • The entire font on Mike’s blog, that is. The promo, not that I do more than skim it, is so small, I can no longer even skim it.

        HELP!

        Reply

        • Dawn I’m no technical wizard by any means, but I do view this site using several different devices, and will try to give hopefully helpful advice… on one device I use Chrome and need to enlarge the font to read the page, I do this by going to the upper right corner where there are 3 horizontal bars, when I click once on the 3 bars a menu shows, about in the middle of the menu choices, about 7 down from the top I see something that says “zoom” and then 100%… if I change this to higher, like 150% or 200%, it changes the font size for the whole page to much bigger. I’m thinking most browsers have a version of zoom, or size, or percentage… a different browser on another device I use has plus and minus symbols, and you can click these for larger or smaller fonts size in the page… does that help at all? It’s very basic advice, maybe you were looking for something more complex or detailed, if so, sorry… again, I’m not a techie… i’m just an average girl living in this world, not intending to bother or upset anyone. 🙂

          Reply

  11. I had the most “OT” win when I completed the “Scientologist who is PTS to the Church of Scientology” Rundown. My “win” was : I could suddenly have good relations with my mother who loved me, where before leaving Scientology, I was prevented from having a normal relationship with my mother who loved me. 🙂 IT”S MAGIC ! And it literally cost me NOTHING. AND I got my money back from the church that I thought was full of Scientologists who actually turned out to be PTS robots and crooks and liars who lie lie lie lie.

    Reply

  13. Business as usual I see in the Cof$. What a horrid organisation it is.
    Any child or person has those “OT abilities” as a natural ability to dream a little and co-ordinate it with actuality. The Cof$ has created a business model based on it along with suppression of the very worse kind – they actually focus on making you do yourself in while crippling you financially, just horrible!
    It’s a Godsend their numbers are minimal, better if it was none at all though.

    Reply

    • MUCH better if they were disbanded. You know what continent has many problems? Africa. Maybe they should move all of the Model Idle Morgues to every country in that continent. I mean, I’m sure they citizens would welcome them. Now that would be doing something useful…

      Reply

  14. Everyone’s going spaz over the ATM Machine Incident (and well they should), but I can’t get past something else: some woman gave a Touch Assist to a cat. A freakin’ cat. This is a cat. You feed it, you house it, you give it affection, and it proceeds to not give two fucks about you. If you’re lucky, it might give you a dead mouse as a gift someday, but otherwise, it’s John Oliver’s Janice From Accounting.

    A cat is a complete and utter waste of money, time, and emotion. Let the fucker die.

    By the way, something else could explain the cat’s injuries : he was on the wrong end of a failed mating attempt. The female Felis Domesticus experiences a lot of pain during mating, and she doesn’t want to experience it unless the hormones are overwhelming her. So when she says no, she means it, and she spares nothing if a male insists on sticking his business where she doesn’t want it to belong. tl;dr: she can get very, very violent. To me, this is a better explanation than a car.

    Reply

    • My cat takes a very keen interest in my doings … every morning, at feeding time. I have to admit that she never remarks on the miracle of the clean litter box. Hmm.

      Reply

    • Sammy my cat is offended by your post. She’s a CL12 of the feline kind and knows how to put ethics in. She’d issued you an ethics chit but has a problem holding the pen. She did hiss and the screen though!

      Fur that purrs is good for the soul.

      Reply

      • Hi IYawnalot, Mucho meow for your post.As a Leo I have always adored cats. My 17 year old inside Siamese Jade drinks only ice water knows words and phrases of mine and howls-yowls with the best of them!A furry companion is so good for the soul,well said.I really missed having kitties and doggies in the Sea Org too.xo Ann.

        Reply

      • It isn’t fair being on the other side of the planet sometimes trying to co-ordinate with this blog. My typos are generated pre 6am which seems perfect English to me at that time but no-one is very compendious at that ridiculous hour per my reckoning, coffee or not. Please bear with me, Sammy doesn’t mind though.

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    • Espi….you think a cat story is bad? What about the famous ‘I cured my goldfish with my OT powers’ story?
      Since I actually read that success story, I can sign off as follows:
      This is true,
      Chee

      Reply

    • ok, I don’t know if you were deliberately trying to bait the cat lovers in the room, but really? while I doubt that any touch assist helped that cat, it is likely that the cat was hit by a car (glancing blow and thrown) and was bruised and sore. Male cats will not attempt to mate with females that are not in heat, plus, it states in the story that the cat is a him. in any case, it’s more likely that the cat spent the night under the bed purring (the particular sound waves of which have been proven to decrease healing time of broken bones and injuries.)
      and before you pass me off as a nutty cat lady, i’m also a licensed veterinary technician with 20 years experience in practice with cats. I have seen cats shrug off incredible injuries.

      Reply

    • I hate people who don’t like cats. Espiando you’re an asshole. I really think you should go fuck yourself.
      Better hope I don’t ever run into you.

      Reply

        • Cats are such beautiful, wonderous animals. Cats are functional – they can keep your home free of mice, spiders, and other bugs. Cats are also helpful in terms of emotional support, just petting your cat can calm your nerves and make you feel more serene and peaceful, it can even lower your high blood pressure, this has been documented in medical studies.

          Cats have been known to show signs of impending earthquakes and some have awakened their owners from a house fire enabling them to escape. They are fun to watch, kittens are so cute when they play. The world would be a harsher, colder place without cats.

          Espiando, I’m guessing you did not have a pet cat in your life while growing up, otherwise you would have love for cats. The only people I know who don’t like cats are those who never experienced the joy of cat companionship as a child, so to them, the cat is mysterious, somewhat unsettling… it’s the fear of the unknown, something foreign and strange to you. Once you know a cat personally, you will love a cat.

          Reply

          • No, I just don’t have any use for pets in general. Do you know Jean Genet’s line about masturbation, that it’s the perfect form of love because the amount of affection given equals the amount of affection received? Same thing applies to pets, in my opinion. If I’m investing time, money, and emotional attachment into something, I’d like something resembling equal reciprocation.

            Reply

            • Hi Espiando, I was reading your post about pets and I thought what if you built a robotic one that could reciprocate and guard your space as well.I am not joking,if you made me a cat I would consider purchasing one fron you.xo Ann.

              Reply

          • T.J. I was just responding to the criminally insane person who was threatening to kill someone over their opinion. NOT responding about cats. 😉

            Reply

            • Mike Wynski, I was just making some general observations about cats after reading all the cat-related comments (I love cats, and pets in general) – I wasn’t intending to respond particularly to your remarks, it looks like I put my post in the wrong place, which seems to be something I tend to do – sorry! no harm intended. 🙂

              I should give my standard disclaimer: * I’m just an average girl living in this world, not meaning any harm or upset to anyone. Wishing you well…

              Reply

              • T.J. I didn’t take it as anything bad, no worries. I just was clarifying my remark. I like cats but mostly outdoor cats. Although kittens are a total blast to play with. Kitten + laser pointer = loads of fun. 🙂

  15. we could do a mag with ex-scns telling the wins we have after being declared. like i got my cleaning lady to come at the exact day and time i wanted her! or my son’s dog brks when he hars me on the hone with me. and my children call me almost every day and come see me a lot! not my kids who are still in the cult.

    Reply

    • Exccia you MUST join me, OSD, Espi (even if he does dislike cats), Ann B and a host of others in publishing our new magazine Retreat! Full of bitter, defrocked apostates sharing their no-cost wins, – like waking up and seeing the beautiful face of the woman I have loved for the past 28 years – stories of our children and their children thriving, miscellaneous pet stories and vacation pics. It will be lovely.

      Reply

      • Hi Scott Henderson, What a super idea! Thank you.We could do damage with the new mag and I love the no- cost win comment.Perfect! So many talented spirits on this blog could do a bang up beyond OT job.As you sensitively posted waking up and seeing life outside the bubble is lovely, precious and dusted with true starlight far beyond what cos has become.Love,Ann.

        Reply

    • Well, there are, in fact, fresh meat bodies in abundance. However, you’ll have to go to Europe and round ’em up. Mexico and Puerto Rico too. I mean, how long are you really going to stay on staff without getting paid?

      Reply

  17. Decided to see how things were down at Flag this past week. Drove by one early evening, and beautiful lights on the outside, but virtually none one could see inside. Drove down all those store fronts, all brightly lite, didn’t see more than one person in any of them. Oh, saw one what appeared to be a seaorg security wandering around.

    Did a walk around yesterday late afternoon. Not a soul in sight except at the one entrance, where a small group of maybe 10 seaorg members were waiting for the Flag bus. Everything including sidewalks were impeccably spotless, but just devoid of life. All one had to do was walk to Court Street, and aside from street traffic, people were bustling all over the place. Two totally different realities.

    I’ve been at the Vatican and around the temple in Salt Lake City. Lot’s of people, activity, hustle and bustle. What a dead ‘religion’. What a facade.

    Oh, saw one car, an Echo perhaps, all graphic wrapped up pushing Dianetics. The girl driving it had a very vacant look in her eyes.

    Reply

    • Hey, I was around Flag a few weeks ago too; very empty except for a dozen or so SO mementos outside.
      I remember seeing them being pretty much the only poor souls aboard those Flag buses that shuttles people around. How out-PR.

      Reply

  18. What’s “Original OTI” and “New OTI”? Never heard of that. These dismal stats of course indicate that the lower Class V orgs – especially all the “Ideal Orgs” are not pushing people up to the AOs. ircling the drain indeed.

    Reply

    • Original 1 & 2 were just two more made up things to do while holding soup cans (you can find them online). They (like all “OT levels” ) did nothing to make one more able so eventually El Con changed them to make it seem like he was “improving the bridge” to nowhere.

      Reply

  22. Mike, I have not been able to gain access to your page for three days.
    I tried your direct IP address and still couldn’t access.
    Had a friend try from another address, but in my same town, and no joy.

    Obviously, your page is back up for me, but still down at the other location.
    Maybe your provider knows something?
    Or maybe it isn’t that widespread.
    It seems to be regional somehow.

    Anyway, at least if your stats drop, you’ll know why and won’t have to eat rice and beans over it, lol.

    Reply

    • Hi Victoria Pandora, You are not alone.Since coming on this blog, I have had quite some adventures with cut and paste blocking of the blog,to what you just experienced.I have learned that my ignore button works well when trying to figure out why those who engage in this stuff do not have something better to do,with their time.Just proves what I always knew.Mike Rinder is a most potent force for change to the cult and we are stripping bit by bit the veneer of arrogance and hubris that cos is riddled with now from the top on down.
      The wheels are indeed coming off.Love,Ann

      Reply

    • We had the same problem yesterday – couldn’t access the blog at all. It finally seemed to come right in the wee hours this morning. Thought it was a local issue (South Africa) but now I’m not so sure…..

      Reply

    • Another indication of the unconscious mindset of the members of the Church of Scientology. It is a good thing in the church to eat artery clogging, cholesterol forming, energy zapping stroke inducing meats and animal fats, but it is an insult to eat a high fiber, high protein, low fat, high carbohydrate heart attack fighting meal like rice and beans. Is the church getting stupider or am I getting smarter? Any person that wants better health would know rice and beans is a health conscious meal, not an insult like the Church of Scientology teaches. Do you want to know why Victoria? Because most of the people in the Church of Scientology are F*****G A******S. 🙂

      Reply

      • Hi Lawrence, I liked your post.Gosh did you say Rice mixed in with beans.What I would have given for abit of rice mixed in with my months and months of cold beans and dogs.At least the beans gave me some protein like the organic PB we had at midnight rations.I learned to hide the doggies and not eat them.
        I seem to recall some bulletins on what to eat at breakfast or some such from Ron,The thing was he may have been into great scrambled eggs,but as a lowly new Sea Org recruit I got lukewarm coffee from the vending machine @ Asho morning noon and night.Only when we moved from The Bodihi Tree space where Asho D & Fdn ate and moved to a Cuban much bigger space and I and other expediters had to scrape grease off the walls there for weeks,did I get some real eggs once or twice.Not the wonderful powdered numbers the Excalibur used.Always,Ann.

        Reply

        • Ann, the whole point is, the church punishes downstat members with a healthy diet and rewards upstat members with an unhealthy one. Is there some kind of hidden logic or verifiable science to their choices? Will things ever work out for them anyway if their auditing and training leads them to unhealthy habits anyway? There is much that can be discussed about the Church of Scientology and my contributions to this blog are only the tip of an iceberg.

          Reply

          • Hi Lawrence, I see your point but I do not think you see mine.I was not comparing diets on the Sea Org as it did not matter to me who was upstat or downstat.When you are fighting for your physical life,that point is moot.My experience of course is mine alone. I put out there what happened to me and believe me I would not wish it on anyone.Always,Ann.

            Reply

              • My web site is going back up after 5 years off line. In my spare time. Some of it is already back up on line, this time WordPress instead of my other host. The link to it is available by clicking on my name the link become available. It takes as long as it takes to get done, but it does not look like the church is getting anywhere these days. Is there even such a thing as a Saint Hill anymore? 🙂

        • When I hear conversations about what the SO eat, or rather what they DON’T get to eat. I think of Hubbard amassing his millions in suitcases and in vaults in Switzerland or whereever, while the people who slogged so that he could make his millions eat rice and beans.

          Reply

        • Hi OSD, Walter seconds your post.Shock he never goes to Mike’s site.As a never in the lingo can give him a headache.Actually with my cancers I second your post too, but approaching 65 a robust zin with whole grain crackers and a good sharp cheese of any type = heaven.Wait something chocolate for a sweet! Wait Kona coffe the next am.xxoo Ann B.

          Reply

  23. It is amazing how bad these posted numbers are, and Scientology is obsessed with numbers. I see a number of second gens on the lists. AOLA, the new hotel on Fountain, and even the whole complex (PAC Base) looks entirely different now. It’s been completely modernized and is very nice. The grounds are lovely too. It’s just so strange; so much was done to make things comfortable and look good, but much too late. The Sea Org staff must be hearing it every day as though it’s their fault. I hope more will leave for a normal life soon, including the canned execs.

    Reply

  24. Most likely an Int. Mission was sent to PAC to remove these execs by telling them they are going to be cramed and corrected at Flog. When they arrived at Flog they were taken to the parking garage at the Fort Harrison and were put directly in the RPF. No recourse, no remorse and no compassion. Just,” the RPF is what we make it, The RPF is where we’ll make it.” In really the Sea Org has turned into an Organization where you will never make it.

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  26. How long ago was the Briefing Course cancelled?
    Was there an issue or event that gave reasons? Is there a link?
    Seems that in the Scientology world you couldn’t commit a more suppressive act.

    Reply

  27. ATM card story is an example of the
    Chris Angels Magicians Kit which is a
    whole lot less than what AOLA charges.

    This person would have been better off
    without the card on the Freewinds.

    Reply

  28. OT guy needs to keep in ‘present time’ and always know the location of his ATM card. No, he did not magically take his ‘seized’ card out of the machine, it was spat out and he put it back in his wallet. OT guy just doesn’t remember that.

    Hell, maybe this guy is ready for Penn and Teller’s ‘Fool Us’ show. If $cientology can fool Mr. OT into believing he can magically transport his ATM card, how hard can real card tricks be?

    The Exec Strata of $cienoville are supposed to be the best of the best. By lopping off their heads at every downturn, DM has become the ISIS of management. Now the former management has to re-re-re-do some ‘course’ or ‘management training’ to stay in the bad graces of DM. Yes, DM turned a firing into a money making opportunity. All hail the COB!!

    Reply

    • Oh zemoo. Can’t you tell the “bank” guys were psychs? And the “bank” was a front to infiltrate and destroy scientology?

      Now of course their suspicious behavior makes sense. But they’ve been taught a serious lesson, just by having an OT walk in and demolish their toy operation in less than 2 minutes.

      Naturally he couldn’t write up his win like that, so he had to put it in code so the psychs won’t know their cover is blown. But an SP like you wouldn’t get that ….

      Reply

  29. I thought Jill Carmel’s six “how I did it” tips were really sad and dark. If she is anything like me, someday she is going to have a very different view of these six actions.

    Reply

    • Me too. Her choice to basically disconnect from her “friends” (scare quotes, hers) so she could do that dreck instead of have fun is really sad.

      Reply

    • My god, I guess I should add, that at no time was I unable to pay a vet bill:/
      “I couldn’t afford proper vet treatment for my cat, but he survived somehow anyway” is now a “win”.

      Reply

      • Exactly what I was thinking too… poor kitty. Veterinarian: Your cat’s been hit by a car, he’s in pain. OT: Yah, I don’t want to spend any money on him, I’ll just take him home and toss him under the bed.

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  32. Mike, what were the execs busted for? And why all of them? Also, the OT Phenomena was much better back in the mid 70s. I actually contacted every org I could to get back copies. Of course, it was all bullshit, but, they were fun to read! It seemed that those posting in the OT Phenomena section were trying to outdo the rest of the people posting there. Ahhhh, yes. Back when I consumed much Kool-Aide…

    Reply

    • Now just wait a darn minute … these “execs” ARE trained in LRH “Admin tech”, right? At Flag, right? (where they and the supes have attested to them being able to apply what they have learned) Then why didn’t they just apply the steps of the formulas of the Conditions for the states of existence so that they could move into the higher condition? Very puzzling indeed! Why didn’t they have any OT wins on their posts?

      Reply

  33. Ah the Superpowers of Scientology (SOS) – worth every penny!

    What — with Tom Cruise being the only person who can help save lives at the site of a traffic accident; Moxon and his lovely wife, from their bedroom, being able to reverse the guns of some far distant planet trained on Washington DC backwards to blow up the planet; David Miscavige miraculously turning the waters of Gilman Hotsprings into the best single malt Scotch; people being able to find their ATM card they lost a whole 5 minutes before; and a sunbather being able to wish away an angry (maybe it resembled COB’s angry face?) dark cloud blocking the sun — where do I sign up?

    The goal of scientology now seems to be to replace the reactive mind by the delusional mind — for a fee.

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  34. (not so “OT” when you lost them, but you are not supposed to notice) .. thoughjt often, why they lost the key in the first place .. why the success story about as an OT .. the process is to go back to the last time where you had him .. if you can do,that, you know where he is now .. works always ..

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  35. They now have Ad Course Preps & OT Preps?

    Anyway, selling the shit sandiches (OT levels) has ALWAYS been a limited time game. After a VERY few years everyone in Scn with an IQ > 80 figured out that there was nothing to these but B.S. So, what is left since the Bridge is a complete lie?

    Reply

    • What he didn’t realize is that he put the wrong card in the ATM machine, probably a charge card, and because it wasn’t his debit card, the machine didn’t recognize it and so confiscated it. That is why his ATM card was in his wallet — because it never left his wallet. And he cries, “It’s a miracle!” when in reality he was the dufus who put the wrong card in the ATM machine in the first place. Scientology — where you take your mistake and turn it into an OT phenomena, thus making yourself right when you were really wrong. Doublespeak abounds: Wrong is Right.

      Reply

        • Lol! (We didn’t laugh like this when we were in, hey? We took ourselves and everything so seriously. It was gloom and doom and laughing was the glee of insanity, I was told. Or you were “line charging”, a release of insanity? Etc. One didn’t just laugh and get hysterical without some darn label to spoil it.

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    • LOL. The ATM one is a doozy. First the machine eats the card, then the machine is opened and nothing is inside. The teller notices the card “inside” the guys wallet on top of the counter (hmm) and points it out to the guy. Later, the bank admits that the card was indeed retained and returned. WTF, maybe the guy suffers from short-term memory loss. He probably got riled up from reading the message, pulled the card out, put it in his wallet, forgot he did so, and thought it was inside the machine. Poor teller, with a flaky customer. If this story actually exists.

      Reply

      • I hope he can “OT” away the onset of Alzheimer’s. When you walk to another room and forget why you went in there, that’s getting old. When you forget that you just put your ATM card back in your wallet two seconds ago and start hallucinating that the card flew back to you through a vault wall, that’s some really bad news.

        Reply

  37. And most of us wrote those kind of success stories.

    One good thing about those completions, I don’t know any of those people listed.

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  38. Can OTs work magic enough to put money into their accounts? Someone got an ATM card back that the machine “ate.” What about balances similarly “eaten”?

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  39. Some time ago I read through the rules for James Randi’s million dollar challenge. There was a list of supposed psychic phenomena which were so pathetic that Randi asked people not to bother submitting for the prize, on the grounds that a) they were meaningless and b) vast numbers of people had deluded themselves into thinking they could perform them. High on the list was ‘the ability to move clouds at will’.

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  40. Well there is the answer to Global Warming….too many OT’s are burning clouds away.
    This comment was made in jest of the above OT “win”. It was not intended to invoke comments
    as to the validity of Global Warming one way or the other.

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  41. I’m just sitting her laughing. These stories are just so simple (meant in the intelligence sense) that I’d be embarrassed to say anything like it. Wognited, I misread one part of your post as “died (dyed) in the woof!” Seems appropriate. ROFL

    Mike, more than the insanity, here you’ve pointed out the inanity! VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVWD!!!

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  42. Mike has better Oat Tea powers than any of these Culties. Mike walks into the Clearwater Starbucks and says with a smile, “Hi guys”. Guys: “Oh shit!” “Oh no!” “OH PHUCK!” “I gotta go!” “I REALLY gotta go– to the bathroom!” STAMPEDE OUT THE DOOR. Starbucks guy: “Wow, how did you do that?” Mike: “My Oat Tea powers”. Starbucks guy: “Where can I get some of that that Oat Tea? Those assholes are scaring away all of my customers!” Mike: “It’s a long story…..”

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  43. Mike! Did I miss something? What happened to the Briefing Course (a year and a half spent at Flag training on Class VI was all in my mind?)

    On another note, maybe COB will do another amnesty and clean out the RPF and put them back on posts like he did in 1991.

    Reply

  45. Have all the execs at PAC been replaced like this before?

    I assume they were replaced because of the stats being so low, but was there an official reason given?

    Any ideas on how long it will take before the new group gets replaced?

    Or, maybe PAC base will consolidate somehow. Possibly even to Clearwater?

    Reply

  46. When AOLA moved into their current building 4 decades ago, they filled it. They have never needed a bigger building. Looking at their pathetic statistics they might want to have ASHO move in and share the utility bill.

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  47. Holy shit, that ATM card story is beyond nuts. Let me see if I can get this straight: According to the blithering idiot who is reporting this event, the machine really did take his card (he didn’t hallucinate that) and then his OT powers magically zapped his card back into his wallet without him even being aware of doing it. So, it seems his powers are totally outside his control and awareness.

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    • So true. I would have been embarrassed by the fact that I had forgotten and put it back in my wallet and would never have called again to see what happened. The fact that he followed up on what happened that day is beyond comprehension.

      “Joe, it’s that idiot who put his debit card back in his wallet and then told us the machine ate it, what should I say to him?”

      “Well Sally, he’s a good bank customer, always makes large deposits (though he seems to withdraw all his money on an even more regular basis), let’s just tell him it really happened that the machine ate his card and send him on his way. I hope that mental institution treats him well.”

      I have had the machine eat my card once. I pulled out of the drivethrough and walked into the bank. My hair wasn’t standing on end nor was in any way distraught. They retrieved my card without having to “calm” me.

      Reply

      • You stayed calm, and then they retrieved your card? See, you have OT powers too! I bet you didn’t even notice. As for me, I rode my bike to work today, right through Manhattan, and I lived to tell about it. OT!!!

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    • “Blithering idiot” ?

      This guy was on the verge of uncovering the link between Big Banking and Big Pharma and the Psychs. No wonder the bank people couldn’t give him a straight story. They must have been sweating bullets when an OT walked into their scummy little establishment.

      It’s only his shatter and confront that enabled him to walk out of there alive.

      Now it’s established we can no longer trust Big Banking, it’s time for the CoS to salvage humanity with a new entity: the Bank of Scientology.

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  48. Hi Mike, Thank you for another thought provoking post. The stats from AOLA on OT level completions were stunningly bad. I had to read them over more than once to let it sink in.And I can’t even start on the OT Sucess Stories,whoops I mean OT pie in the sky as in who can craft the biggest whopper into praise for cob and his magical OT leadership! Laughter!
    Seriously AOLA circling the drain,never thought I would see that in my life,but at this point,it feels so wonderful that the wheels are slowly coming off the cult.xo,Ann.

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  49. Like always before. The best tricks ever done on that sort of appearances were Under LRH, when after having created “natural or dn clears”, the “clears” stats were gone to the top… then, hoping to make more money, LRH fabricated the “susnshine RD” ineptitude, so as to slow down people who were waiting to get on OTIII, thern he invented new other ineptitudes, like the Drug RD for OTs, then the newly rehearsed “OT levels”, particularly the New Eara Dn for OTs!
    All this to get more money, while increasing the average auditing hour prices up to ten between 1977 and 1982, calling that getting up like the inflation scale.
    Many many staffs even Class XIIs were offloaded by LRH orders then!
    DM does exactly the same sort of calculations.

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  50. I received this Advance in the mail also and I had the same impression! “Why is this Mag put out?! The Completion stat is awful!” But someone somewhere did get a stat for mailing this piece of mail to me (even though I am an SP). So there is that plus.

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  52. ‘Beating the Odds’ story:
    “No! I have to have my card! I am going on the ship next week…..where I will be regged within an inch of my life! I need my card because I’ve already paid for the Freewinds, but I’ll need to take out cash on the ship in order to pay for the fuel!”
    So, this ship is supposed to be where the highest levels of Scientology spirituality are delivered, yet they have an ATM on board?
    P.M. sounded a bit panicked….. How could he gonon a spiritual journey without his ATM card!

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  53. OMG – talk about the universe trying to help the poor soul whose ATM card was taken by the machine…LOL
    but the “died in the wool” Scientologist will claim the Psychs are fucking with the machines…in order to supress the most ethical group on the planet – (cough cough)

    Oh – Scientology has reached the EP of Scientology Suppressing Scientology. It is what happens to evil after a while – it self destructs.

    Really – we don’t have to do much of anything at this point – but we will…cuz it is fun to watch this group disintegrate into nothing!

    Suppress Scientology Daily is my mantra!

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  54. DEFECATING AT TAMPA ORG
    I was at Tampa Org and suddenly felt the urge to go #2. I went to the men’s room that was beautifully adorned in marble floors and touchless faucets.

    I sat down on the toilet and suddenly realized there was no toilet paper! Oh the horror! I felt enturbulated and felt myself going down tone. I thought about doing a theta wipe, but wasn’t quite sure if the MEST would become a MESS. Since I’ve only doing the running program twice, I wasn’t quite sure if I could be OT enough to confront this. So I thought “what am I going to do?”

    Suddenly, I realized I had a cell phone in my pocket. So I called my wife and in true OT style, she answered the phone!! I told her I had to get in comm with her about this issue. She grabbed a roll of toilet paper from the house and drove over to the Org.

    She spit in the face of the MEST universe and walked right into the men’s bathroom! (Note: I heard even Bruce Springsteen may come play here now!) She instantly cognited the EP and handed me the roll of toilet paper under the door.

    #beingOThasitsadvantages

    Reply

    • That’s very OH TEE Tommy J! The problem here is that you failed in your Oh Tee Wipe. That of course is grounds for a sec check of magnanimous proportions and the KRs will be pouring in to the RTC website from all of us out here on the fringes.

      There of course is a new unwritten brown on white policy for this and Dave has been known to accomplish the same feat with ease as he simply yells for help and any number of wipelings show up to handle the scene. This is the new GAG TOO standard and you will need to comply or face your ‘I’m not auditing you’ wipeling.

      And of course they’re ‘not auditing you’! They haven’t been auditing anyone for years!

      Yo Dave,
      Can we expect the new Brown on White Vols to be announced for the Maidan Voyage?

      Reply

    • (tears falling down my face, sniff, sniff) That’s the most remarkable Success Story I’ve ever read! The humanity of it just choked me up. I’m just so happy that in the ‘end’ everything came out great. I wish I had a success story like that.

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  55. Beating the Odds: So the machine takes your ATM card. Instead of remaining calm, the bank employee has to calm you down. That does NOT seem OT at all. And then, magically, your card is back in your wallet, and you don’t even realize you “used your OT power” to get it there. Again, does NOT seem OT to me.

    I honestly can’t believe they even published this tale. At least the cat healer was consciously trying to use their power.

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  56. Wow, color me impressed! Why just this morning my lovely wife visibly demonstrated her heretofore undocumented Wife XI™ powers by making the last cup of coffee disappear whilst my back was turned. Visibly shaken by this stunning display superhuman ability I dropped my Pop Tart only to Mr. Waggy Wag display HIS Canine XVI™ powers by scarfing it up before I had a chance to pull out the broom.

    I should start a magazine…

    Reply

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