The “Ideal Org” in Melbourne (where you can “have it all” — guitars, Mercedes’, kids etc) seems to be having some difficulty locating a few good men.
They are advertising on a site called “SeekVolunteer” to try to fill various staff positions. Some of them are quite amusing.
But certainly these “volunteers” are not going to be able to “have it all” like the ads promote…
You see the Largest Private Relief Force on earth is advertising for volunteers to come help “dispense indiscriminate help”? How strange is that? And offering “free” trips to Japan, Nepal, Taiwan etc. (they don’t tell them Japan and Taiwan have their own “ideal” orgs and they tell the people there they might send them to disasters in Melbourne!)
Years after going Ideal, Melbourne (like every other org on earth) is STILL not St Hill Size despite what “Ron said” that it only takes a few weeks.
They even have their own show on ScientologyTV now which will likely have absolutely no impact on anything.
As I was born in Melbourne, I felt it my duty to watch the infomercial. As an ad for the city of Melbourne, it was quite good. Though if you watch it you might be left with the impression the ONLY thing anyone in Melbourne is interested in is sport. You don’t get the idea that scientology has any relevance whatsoever. Even the building they occupy is tied to the land where an Australian Rules football team was founded. It’s like someone gave the scriptwriters a theme for the episode and they stuck to it beyond any sensible limits. They even feature my brother (who was integral to the fundraising) talking about the stairwell in the building. It is pretty bizarre. Don’t see anyone pressing their face to thew windows of the Melbourne org after watching this — not that anyone is likely to watch it.
That Melbourne video is hilarious – every shot of the org with a constant stream of people walking around in the background. Weird how I go past there every day and despite the full carpark I can go weeks without seeing a soul. It’s empty enough to make you wonder if they lease carparks to the tram drivers based across the street.
What is the point of the guitar? It is clearly unsuitable for smuggling toilet paper…
At the end of tonight’s show (12/11/18) it said “In Memoriam: Tiponi Grey.” She was a guest / former Scientologist on the show tonight. What happened to her? Did she pass away??
Every time I see one of these ‘You Can Have it All’ posters crap I want to gag – it is such a total and utter LIE. They are trying to imply that you can be on staff and have a life. There is NOTHING further from the truth. Once you’re in the scientology staff web you are theirs and only theirs to do their bidding. Anything else (like your own life) is considered ‘out ethics’, ‘counter-intention’, ‘other purpose’ and ‘first dynamic oriented’… Every sense of self identity is hammered out of anyone who works for scientology. These posters need huge warning signs! (Oh and ‘volunteering’ is one step away from staff and treated pretty much the same only now you’re giving up your life for free….)
“Every sense of self identity is hammered out of anyone who works for scientology.”
So true. They said the opposite, of course. To get you to sign on, they’d say that being on staff GAVE one a life, that before being on staff they HAD no life. And to a certain degree that was true, because many of them married or became coupled off based on the logistics of being on staff. Staff married or partnered with other staff or with those willing and/or able to support them financially so they could be on staff. So to that degree it was true.
But from the beginning, what I observed was that married or single, Class V org staff had no lives apart from complete subjection to whatever might be needed and wanted at the org at any given time. I shared living space with single staff members, several of them, and I saw first hand with each of them what their lives were. When I had them as roommates, I’d pay a lot more and they’d pay a small portion of the rent, or nothing. They were never home and would get calls from the org or their seniors sometimes as late as 1AM, ordering them into the org, or for – whatever.
To recruit you, they’d call it freedom and power on all dynamics.
What I observed was slavery.
Of course, back then, I never SAID what I really thought to anyone. Oh, nooooo!
But over the years, I saw what I saw with staff and what their lives were really like, and seeing that up close kept me from ever signing on.
Mike, I emailed you about this months ago – not sure you saw it but yeah they have been advertising on here for a while!
No experience necessary. Just a pulse.
Sorry Mike, I couldn’t resist.
Once a little dave-man camped by a dying morgue
Under the shade of a PR screen,
He drank as he watched and waited for his unearned gains
You’ll come a-Wanking Miscavige, with me
Wanking Miscavige, Wanking Miscavige
You’ll come a-Wanking Miscavige, with me
He drank as he watched and waited for his unearned gains
You’ll come a-Wanking Miscavige, with me
BTW as suspected Erica Lennie, as depicted above holding a guitar, is a UK Glasgow model and frustrated musician. I below she may also work in media production. But NOT apparently a Scientologist nor an Australian. More foto-fraud from COS Central. (Sorry Mike doesn’t allow posting pics as Tony Ortega does.)
No wonder Erica is smiling – at least she probably got paid for the impersonation. Scientology once again as transparent as obsidian.
Aka you googled “Erica Lennie” and the first thing that popped up was a random Glaswegian’s bio. A simple image search clearly shows you are mistaken. This isn’t helpful.
Not true. I HAD done a “simple image search” and it clearly shows I was spot on. Multiple pictures of her look like the same person. How do you think I knew? What are the odds otherwise?
And of course $cientology is notorious for using paid models in their SO “ideal-looking” staff shots PR so therein lies the relevance. So not a surprise.
The distinctive guitar headstock is more a giveaway than the girl, imho.
Her video has all of 10 views. Probably all by readers of this blog!
I did a search quick search which turns up that she’s got family in, including either her grandmother or someone else named after the grandmother, and seems to have a Facebook account with video of her playing the guitar. A couple of people seem to have jumped the gun with their assumptions.
Try googling “Erica Lennie Scientology” and see what you make of the results.
It’s beyond hilarious the naive smiling girl (no doubt a hired non-$cientologist model) with the guitar in hand – CUT TO: the hammer-down reality and the crestfallen tired SO face who gets NONE OF THE ABOVE and working nonstop, having no time for fun, guitar playing or anything else.
$cientology & LRH are their own worst enemy. Their thinly veiled cult PR tactics as looking like anything remotely human is specious and beyond any type of credibility.
As a guitarist, she is not holding the guitar the way anyone who plays would hold it. I suspect the person is just posing with one for the shot.
“You CAN have it all – make sure you buy a guitar before you join staff, though. You won’t have the money to buy one after, and it might be useful for busking to make ends meet.”
Social Media Management, Marketing/Graphic Design….why aren’t they using World Wide PR?
Merry Christmas to all!
I cobbled this together about nine years ago so it’s not new but every year, the timing is right!
Twas the Night Before Christmas
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the Org
Not a PC was red-tagged, not even on the scheduling board.
The repackaged Basics were lined up with care
In the hopes that some public would soon be there.
The staff were all bunked up, hardly room in their beds
For the visions of freedom that danced in their heads.
And I with my meter, my sole source of means
Had just finished up with a plateful of beans.
When out in the parking lot, there arose such a ruckus
My first thought was, “Ah-oh, who’s here to fuck us?”
Away to the scene, I ran real damn fast
Knowing if something was wrong, it would be my ass.
The smog and the fog gave little to see
But then in the lot, an old car came rolling at me.
The closer I looked, I thought I could discern
It was pulled by eight RPFers with lessons to learn.
The driver was short, could hardly see over the wheel
His windpipes so small, his screams were more squeal.
I knew in a moment it must be the Cob
Shaking his fists, he’d come here to rob.
He leaned out the window, throwing curses my way
As he yelled at the staff who were pulling his sleigh.
“Now Marty! Now Heber! Now Yager and Rinder!
On Mitoff! On Tommy! On Headley and Claire!
To the top of the graphs held up by thin air!
For the New Year’s event our statistics are there!”
With a grunt and a pull despite being sore
They got the car over to the bookstore door
The back seat was full, overloading the wreck
Bright new releases, the latest lost Tech.
And then with a creak, a moan and groan
The staff braced itself and started looking forlorn
He opened the door and slipped out real quick
Surprised he didn’t fall, his shoe soles so thick
Dressed in all navy he looked like a sight
His brass was all polished and looked ready to fight.
Handmade Egyptian shirts he wore
Not the kind most anyone could buy at the store.
His eyes were glazed with power and lust
He could break a man’s soul, his rank he could bust.
His troll little mouth was pursed and tight
The blood on his hands was hid by the night.
With the snap of his fingers, the world he could move
Short men want power, he had something to prove
A command over others, a girlfriend named Lou
His motto was money but debt for you.
He wasn’t real big, really more like an elf
I laughed when I saw him in spite of myself.
He muttered about staff’s lack of respect
But with empty orgs, what could he expect?
Then he spoke not a word but walked inside
Straight to cashbox to where the public did tithe.
He tilted the box and opened his bag
But there was no money, the staff were in rags
He cursed aloud then shouted out a plan
“A call to arms, shoulder to shoulder and man to man!”
Into the car, through the air he dove
Cracking the whip over those he drove.
As it started to roll, I heard the staff moan
Hardly a man standing, they were very down tone.
But I heard him exclaim as they rolled out of sight
“Unprecedented expansion is ours tonight!”
Humbly tendered as a Christmas gift to all Scientology staff: past, present and future.
Applause! Brilliant ?
Bravo and well done!
Volunteer Teaching “Aid”…….I thought the correct word was AIDE….
Read the words on the Disaster Response Volunteers…..”Recent events have SEND such teams into…blah blah blah …
Home Work Volunteers….GOD HELP the children these volunteers, who are under educated themselves, are going to help children with their homework.
And about as welcome as AIDS.
“As welcome as AIDS”. Well, this may sound a little wierd to many but I owe my life to AIDS. Had I not been found to have terminal AIDS and been booted off of the Freewinds, I would surely be dead by now; probably a suicide.
Of course, It would have been better if ship’s personnel (Heil Napier and his fuehrer Miscaviage) had not continuously taken overt actions to ensure that I would be dead before I received anything resembling medical treatment. Or that they held my wife prisoner for 6 months so that she would not interfere with Napiers declaration to her that I would be dead soon. Even with those shortcomings, I was all but dead when I finally received medical care against their direcrions (They told my wife to put me in a hospice to die.
I thought that the planet was supposed to be cleared by the year 2000? Hell, they can’t even kill one SP in 16 years (though I know they have killed plenty of good people.
Even if they were to start 1000 ‘volunteers’ on staff, Scientology and its environment is so toxic that 99% will always leave. It’s built in to its ‘scripture’.
This scripture is one foul mixture.
Soon – $ciendollatry will have to pay actors to come into the Ideal Orgs and “act” to be staff – serving as volunteers. You know what that means – yep, they will need more money.
To: BPI – Scientologists in good standing (all 320 of you)
From: COB
RE: Donations
We are opening Ideal Orgs around the Globe and will soon be clearing the planet.
We need you to put on the Big Boots in the SKY. You are Big Beans!
Reach deep in your pockets, your family pockets, your friends pockets and your neighbors pockets and give all so we can make Ron’s dream of clearing the planet a reality.
You must donate now, now, now! It is an order for you to beg, borrow and steal money so that we can have the funds to hire and pay actors and actresses to act like volunteers at the various Ideal Orgs. No Scientologist can apply. You do it for free.
See your local Registrar to donate and local Ethics Officer if you won’t donate.
ML
COB
Scientology – Keeping the Show on the Road one LIE at a time.
To: Stat
From: David Miscavige COB RTC
Re: above comment.
“Keeping the show on the road one LIE at a time.”
Lie?
LIE?
How many times do I have to tell you people?
WE DO NOT LIE!
WE EXAGGERATE THE TRUTH SLIGHTLY!
THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!
ML
Dave.
They are trying to recruit for every ‘job’ in the $cieno world. Including Central Files. What happened, did all the sea borg run away? What happened to the original staff?
The ones that still had legs ran away. Those that did not stayed and died.
Sorry for being so downtone; that is just my experience in the matter.
I wonder if this is more as a recruiting pitch to replenish their constantly dwindling membership numbers, or a critical need to get more staff members to keep the small amount of public/whales happy. Probably a bit of both. Either way, it reeks of desperation.
I can hear miscavige now, “I made sure the damn thing was built. Do I have to do everything! Do you jobs and get this thing staffed; you lazy MFCSers.”
COB is so under appreciated. So sad really. I can feel the grief coming on. That was fast, it’s gone! Another win from no longer being in the COD (cult of Dave).
If they re-post the missing video “Melbourne Day Rap Battle Team,” I might come and volunteer.
Quick takeaways for me. . . First, they are asking for volunteer for what are, in any other REAL organization, paid positions. At least that is more honest than telling church members they can ‘have it all’ by being on staff. Second, they ‘do not discriminate on age, CREED, age, sex.’ Really? They are not going to try to pull you into Scientology? They’re going to allow a bunch of measly wogs around their precious thetans?
Sea Org members get about $50 a week but none of the positions listed offer any wage or compensation. Course there’s no billion year contract either. But still; how out exchange can the cult get. No compensation for services that, in some cases will be required for 6 months. Cuckoo! Oh wait; it’s scamtology isn’t it.
I can tell from the photo that this woman doesn’t have any idea how to play guitar. Then again, maybe she’s just started the Artists Course.
I was going to point that out. You beat me to it. Kind of reminds me of when we were young and my 7 year old next door neighbor offered to give my 6 year old little sister guitar lessons. We were ROTFL when she came home and showed us the H chord she had learned.
You would think that someone would at least have her chord the guitar correctly if they were having her pose with it. Of course she wouldn’t want to mess up the only manicure she will ever get while on staff.
I noticed the perfect nails too! Lol. No scrubbing the loo for her!
My thoughts entirely !! 🙂
Artists Course! I can’t believe I ever fell for this load of crap – as if any true artist in their right mind would embrace Hubbard’s dicta. An artist is an artist because they go their own way.
The girl playing the guitar is not even a $cientologist which will not surprise you. She is a native of Glasgow, UK and a model. So obviously not Australian nor lives in Melbourne. More of the Scion foto-fraud brigade at work.
These adds show a dire need for staff. Even Course Admin is offered as volunteered activity.
The disgraceful ribbon yanking ends, the sociopath leader leaves and the staff is now faced with the problem to expand the Org.
Months go by and people don’t reach, in fact they run away from this ‘religion’. Staff has no new recruits, they don’t get paid anyway and whoever still has a bit of awareness runs away from the Cult.
Solution: offer this Volunteer activities which, if you read them, cover various Org Departments based on the Org Board.
I’m sorry for the young kids that joined staff believing they were helping others…
I was thinking they probably didn’t need all that staff, can’t imagine the courseroom is booming. My guess is a skeleton staff is perfectly fine for any org right now, it would just look wrong.
Skeleton staff for another Ideal Morgue where every day is Halloween. It’s only fitting to have Dave dressed up as a jack-o’-lantern. And just like a real pumpkin cut off from the soil, it soon rots.
You bring up a good point: they should free up all the current staff as surplus to requirements. I propose that we set up a “I-donate-my-body-to-Scientology” program to replace them. I can picture the use of my skeleton in Sea Org dress blues at the reception desk implying a precautionary tale to be told!
“Class room assistant” . You might want to be able to spell the position you are hiring for! I’m sorry, but that’s just super annoying!! Classroom. One word. ☺
?
Maybe it really is a “Class Room” for any rich person or celebrity that might drop in, filled with Ikea furniture and chandeliers made from empty expensive scotch bottles that Drunken Monster throws away.
When I was assigned to rhe Ship Project before the ship was purchased i was assigned as an ” Engine Room Helper.”. When the ship was purchased I became the Repair Chief Freewinds responsible for all mechanical repairs on the ship. This was “trained or not, hated or not”. That was OK. So maybe they plan to make this Course Admin they are recruiting the ED.
Scientology sinking to ever lower depths from the land down under.
Classroom assistant, social media manager, graphic designer — oh, sure, this wealthy organization needs you to volunteer to do this work for free!!