Mike Rinder's Blog

Something Can Be Done About It

Thursday Funnies

By 67 Comments

 

“Christmas” seminars…

On how to make money.

Only $50…

 

I doubt Kermit would appreciate this

But it is so typical of scientology who threaten and sue people for using their trademarks at the drop of a hat

 

“Certified” Happiness Education Specialist

Translation: Learn how to make a commission pushing WTH booklets

 

The largest private relief force on earth

Swings into action again. All 2 or 3 of them…

And they have to ask to get 2 or 3?

 

The largest in a decade…

May have to swing by and take some shots. Sure it will be bursting at the seams.

And only $100 to attend!

 

Pat the Parody is back

For a potluck, where you can hear LRH “as you have never heard him before”?

 

New Year’s Eve is now on 30 December

In Los Angeles it is on 14 December.

Why not 31 December? It’s not like the 3oth is a weekend.

I guess they lose too many people who are attending “wog” get togethers…

 

Christmas Party?

That’s about Jesus you know. “The guy on the cross” who is part of the R6 bank.

 

And another one…

Though this is a “bash”

 

It was very exciting

Though no affluences have been attained….

 

Such hypocrisy

Some of the most dishonest people you could ever meet are scientologists who think they must defend scientology at all costs…

 

It’s magic how fast your money disappears

I might have to sneak into one of these “Magic Seminars” one day to find out what it is they pitch?

 

Wonder how scientologists square this?

Hubbard was VERY unhealthy in the end.

 

And here is the pitch that goes with that quote

 

Promise the world…

Even for scientology this is pretty over the top.

Get that raise.

Get that exact position you want.

Remember when this “ideal” org was going to make a “huge impact” by getting scientology “into the tech sector”?

Years down the line and nothing but crickets.

 

We offer you tea or coffee – NOT both

 

It’s an extravaganza

Wonder if this has anything to do with scientology?

Or just a new angle to try to get people in. They used to offer music…

 

A new reason to give us money

We are fighting for kids.

How about fighting for the kids who have been abused in scientology?

 

An evening to remember

You give us $75 to attend a fundraiser

 

Aarggghhh

This is certainly something scientologists do NOT know about

 

Funny how they promote these things internally…

They are ALL scientology.

To the people they reach out to in society with them, they have nothing to do with scientology.

 

Hey, I was in the biggest Mall in Tampa Bay…

I didnt have a costume on so I can’t really brag about it.

But I did think about exposing the abuses of scientology while I was walking around and handed out some Aftermath cards. So I am probably on my way to “ideal.”

 

Flag is getting public to brief their public

No SO member available? No SO member good enough?

And they give attendees a free dinner if they will show up to get a pitch from an FSM?

The Commodore is rolling in his grave.

 

Human Rights

Going to talk about children in the Sea Org?

 

This one is just weird…

Maybe I don’t know what ING is so everything else has gone blank?

 

Hubbard is spinning at mad revolutions now…

The Freewinds is sending a Sea Org member to the home of an ex-SO member to deliver a briefing and show a video of “Captain Out 2D”

 

Making Dating Easier

Is this using magic?

 

Come for the music

Stay for the regging…

 

Get ’em while they’re young

 

No discount Black Friday event

This is scientology. Extract full dollar by any means.

 

Comments

  1. Coffee or Tea – What is the single source of “all” unwanted feelings and emotions. Seems to me this is a good chance to scapegoat someone or something. (I don’t know why but I decided that’s a picture of Judy so it’s all her fault).

    Making Dating Easier – How to handle emotions in relationships. Since “all” unwanted emotions (even the ones in relationships) are Judy’s fault, I’d suggest not dating her or letting your GF hang out with her.

    Come For the Music – Grammy Award winning . . . Harriett Schock. I went to her website and she says she is Grammy nominated. Good ‘ol $ci.., never let the truth (or someone else’s copyright) get in the way of your sales pitch.

    Reply

    • They had some other “Grammy nominated” dude that actually nominated himself for a Grammy, or some nonsense, even though he had to standing to do so.

      Reply

  2. “The Beingness Of An FSM.”

    Well let’s start with the physical appearance, shall we?

    Oh, wait…now where is that vulture photo I had a minute ago?

    Reply

  3. Does Kermit the Frog KNOW his likeness is being HAWKED by COS?

    It’s not easy being green…not easy having your imagine hawked to draw in bucks for COS…..but then again GREEN IS THE COLOR OF MONEY…COS’ FAVORITE THING…

    .Hello Henson productions…ummm…I think you should know….

    Reply

  4. You don’t need a seminar, as I’ll be happy to tell you how to make money. First, get people to give you money. Second, now you have money.

    Simple.

    Reply

  5. Where is Applied Scholastics these days?? Outside of $cientology, no one seems to be pushing their ‘look it up in a dictionary’ meme these days. I do they’re so underground that all the dirt has been shoveled over the coffin.

    Reply

  6. …just announced a new event & we wanted to make sure ‘you were the first to know’.

    Mother of God!!! If I hear that line one more time, I’m going to ballistic!!!

    Reply

        • I understand. I’ve been Jonesing for GWTW my whole life.

          Fiddledeedee! God’s Nightgown! Oh, I’ll think about all of this tomorrow, when I can stand it!

          Reply

          • And I’ll eat a dried up turnip from an empty field and throw it up because I”m so broke from giving all my money to the church that I have no food.

            Reply

            • Got it, Cindy. Well, take a tip from Scarlett: lift yourself up, stand straight and tall, raise your fist towards the sky and let your voice ring out loud and clear in YOUR version of, “As God is my witness – as God is my witness – I will never be hungry again!” Talk about “persistence on a given course”…Scarlett’s an inspiration.

              Reply

              • In other words, don’t let the bastards get you down. No matter what and no matter who they are. Because that’s what they’re trying to do. Channel Scarlett O’Hara and don’t let them. Spit in their eye; flourish and prosper.

  7. The Foods of the world. Gee, they must have forgotten Israel. (they are part of the world aren’t they?) I sure hope they have a kosher menu. Wonder if they will have Matzoh Ball Soup, Israeli Rice & Lentil Stew, Bagels and Lox.

    Is this push with cute children relatively new? Are they pushing it more now that the child abuse has really come to light thanks to Leah and Mike and a lot of very brave victims?

    Islamic Networks Group (ING)
    Like the concept.
    Too bad scientology and some of those they associate with doesn’t practice it.
    Love the quote from Helen Keller

    Reply

    • When I saw the images on the flier for “Food Tasting Extravaganza” I could feel my arteries clogging and hardening and gut churning within seconds. Urg!

      As for the rest of the claptrap and just plain crap:
      S
      I
      G
      H
      .

      Reply

  8. The picture under “Such hypocrisy”…
    I misread “an inspiring video about human virtues” as
    “and inspiring video about human _viruses_”

    Pretty much sums up LRH’s mind-trap of Scientology: a human virus

    Reply

  9. I’ve gotten one of those Drug-Free World pamphlets. It’s just a lot of generic bad things about drugs that I learned in grade school, some questionable stuff and “street names” for drugs that make it seem like a joke. (Other words for alcohol include “booze” and “hooch”.)

    Maybe inside the bubble this is good stuff but I don’t see how it gets anyone into Scientology, even drug users.

    Reply

  11. How much is the ticket for the food tasting? R100? What does that mean? One hundred dollars? That seems a little steep.

    Reply

  12. I’m not sure how people handle school emergencies in California. Here we have reunification drills and we know how to handle the emergencies. I am an emergency contact for my grandchildren so have participated in the drills as well.

    If an emergency occurs, as soon as it is considered safe, all the children are immediately taken from the area to a designated safe location (the college, the rec center, etc.) where only the designated people who show ID and know certain information about those children are allowed to associate with them, pick them up and take them home.

    That post just really got my back up. Really? A stranger randomly showing up on the scene and saying look at that wall is more qualified to deal with the traumatized person than the parent or guardian who has already no doubt showed up and taken the traumatized person away from the area? I’ll trust my children and grandchildren’s traumas to those evil psychs thank you very much.

    (Does anyone have a valium? Obviously this one got my hackles up.) *sigh*

    Reply

    • ValR, you are certainly not alone. For some reason which I do not fully understand, I became enormously enraged after reading today’s blog entry.

      Reply

  14. I did my bit today. I tracked down Tenzin Chogki. She is a westerner and a Buddhist teacher in the Tibetan lineage located in the UK. I wrote her and urged her not to participate in this farcical “Celebration of Religious Diversity” and explained why. If she does cancel out, I’ll feel that I’ve really done some good in this battle with scientology.

    As for the other three stooges: maybe some of you could track them down and email them, like I did. I don’t want to do it myself and have them think “it’s just some crank” who’s getting after them. It would be better if they all heard from different people.

    What say you, Rinderites? Your move.

    Reply

      • Diane Frankle, Tenzin Chogkyi and Mahal Elgenaldi are all in the ING stable of speakers. You can find them here: https://ing.org/ing-speakers/

        The Diane Frankle is a member of the All Saints Episcopal Church in Palo Alto. I think she would listen to what you have to say and respond accordingly.

        Maha Egenaldi is the creator of ING, sort of a Moslem front PR organization. You’ll see her name there. Apparently the cherch only approached ING when trawling for “shore story” speakers. Perhaps they figured the Moslem community would be less informed of scientology’s abuses, which may well be the case.

        Please go ahead and email them. Maybe they really don’t know the group they’re speaking for is a scientology front. Let them know that YOU know who it is they’re speaking for. I would think that Diane Frankle, as a liberal Episcopalian, could well change her mind if you thoroughly explained the evils of scientology to her.

        Reply

    • Dianne Frankle is a retired atty residing near Silicone Valley. She is founder of an inter faith program called “Building Bridges” ( all on the Internet I wanted to help bixntram but this appears to be what she does.

      Reply

  15. “Wonder how scientologists square this? Hubbard was VERY unhealthy in the end.”

    I suppose most of them didn’t know he was so unhealthy, right? I was wondering how you framed it while you were still in, Mike. Did you realize how unhealthy Hubbard was at some point? Did it cause you any internal conflict about his teachings? I can imagine 2 kinds of doubt created: 1. LRH doesn’t really follow his teachings as well as he pretends, and 2. the teachings don’t really work. Either of those could lead to the whole house of cards tumbling down. I’m wondering how long before you actually walked out you entertained those kind of doubts. And did they last or did you immediately repress them?

    Reply

    • A scientologist accused of committing unethical acts? Say it ain’t so. (bwahahahahahaha) But obviously, if she is, it is the greatest good for the greatest number.

      Reply

  17. I’m not in the most upbeat mood this morning and reading today’s Thursday Funnies sure doesn’t help. I’m not complaining, Mike. I appreciate your hard work in putting these up and they need to be seen. But just the shamelessness, the lying, the hypocrisy, the steeling of ideas and images, and above all, the sheer greed this horrible cult regularly manifests is a bit overwhelming.

    The most upsetting was the “Celebration of Diversity” seminar. What a bunch of lying hypocrits! Where did they round up the four stooges, Buddhist (!), Christian, Hindu and Muslim? No rabbi – in deference to NOI sensibilites, perhaps? Who the hell is Tenzin Chogkyi? Having done a lot of Buddhist meditation, it bothers me that they rounded up a monk from the Vajrayana lineage. Are these these four “holy” men and women really that ignorant of who and what they’re providing cover for? Absolutely disgusting. I’m done.

    Reply

  18. “Your health depends almost entirely upon your confidence in your ability to handle the physical universe about you and to change and adjust your environment so that you can survive in it.”

    I would like to respond to that nonsense as follows:

    The one point that has been made over and over again is that, “In The Scam, people are taught/forced to believe that when anything good happens to them it is a result of them joining The Scam. But when anything bad happens to them, it is because they “pulled it in” by doing something that is contra to the teachings of The Scam.

    As a consequence of this idiocy, when people get seriously sick, modern medicine and modern Psychiatry and Psychology are both ignored in favor of some crazy Scam treatement – like running around in circles.

    Can you imagine someone who was unfortunate enough to live in a filthy environment – like, the RPF, for example where poor sanitation results in people introducing some harmful bacteria – like E-Coli – into their blood streams resulting in Cholera or Diptheria or any one of a number of terrible diseases that are often life threatening and often result in death. Modern medicine makes it very clear that if your water supply is conatminated with E-Coli (which often results when human exrement is somehow introduced into the water supply), the result will often be some kind of life-threatening disease. Many of these diseases – like Cholera or Diptheria – have symtoms that are so painful and disgusting, I would think many people would prefer to be put to death than to live with these symptoms.

    I won’t include a discription of these symtoms here because many people may be sitting down to breakfast or lunch and would be extremely distressed to read about these symtoms. But, if you are interested, you can do an Internet search on these diseases to read about their terrifying symptoms. I will just say there are very few things more disgusting and more painful than suffering the consequences of these kind of diseases. The only thing that comes close in my mind at this time are the consequences of being duped into joining This Scam. The consequences of that are just terrible, disgusting and without parallel.

    Do you remember what Yul Brenner said about smoking after he learned that he had Lung Cancer and would soon be dead after suffering the horrible effects of Lung Cancer? He said, “If you smoke, for God’s sake, QUIT. If you don’t smoke, for God’s sake, DON’T START.

    If I may, I would just like to advise people to be certain to tell all their friends and relatives, “If you have joined This Scam, for God’s sake, RUN AWAY FROM IT. If you have not joined This Scam, for God’s sake, DON’T START. The consequences are just the most horrible in this world!

    Reply

    • Rats! I don’t have a spell checker hooked up to this site. I really do know how to spell “description” and a few other words. I guess I just got so angry at reading this quote and then realizing how many people are made to suffer such terrible consequences by believing in this that I forgot to use a spell checker before I posted this.

      Sorry.

      Reply

      • Please be advised that today’s edition of the NY Post has a front page story about E Coli and a problem with a “massive salad recall across 22 states”. I had no idea this story would appear when I wrote my post above regarding E. Coli. Here is a link to the NY Post.

        https://nypost.com

        But I just want to make it clear to anyone who reads that post that I just posted what I thought is common knowledge about E. Coli and some of the problems that can result if it is ingested into the Human Body. I checked some of the info in that post and I just want to address some errors that I made.

        E. Coli is a virus. I wrote that it is some kind of bacteria but I am not certain that is the truth. It may well be either a virus or a bacteria or both. I wrote that E. Coli can cause Cholera or Diptheria. But it can also cause Typhoid, Pnemonia, Diarreha, Meningitis and/or Pneumonia.

        Please do not rely on my post for any factual info. If you have some concerns about E Coli, please check the facts with some reliable source. The post I made was just written off the top of my head (so to speak) and can hardly be considered as factual.

        I apologize if I caused anyone any misunderstanding regarding E Coli.

        Reply

  20. A Thursday not -funny. Foundational Black Americans Conference confirms as a speaker Scientology Youth for Human Rights Award Winner Nation of Islam Brother Rizza Islam, who:

    — in a video, calls for racial separation and for Black people to be given “8 to 10″ states” as reparations; and

    — says “It was Jewish bankers who financed Hitler & the Holocaust.”

    Again two tweets.

    https://twitter.com/ISNOINews/status/1197354011583746050

    https://twitter.com/ISNOINews/status/1197490933803163648

    /

    Reply

    • Nation of Islam wants reparations for Blacks and for Blacks to have their own country and nation, separate from Whites.

      Ok, let’s say we were going to implement this.

      First, what IS “black”?

      And then, what is “white”?

      In order to separate “Black” Americans from “White” Americans there has to some way to make the distinction.

      How dark skinned does someone have to be considered black?

      To what degree does a person have to be Caucasian to be considered white?

      I’ve always wondered how the NOI would decide this if the US Government actually agreed to their goals and said, “Here, we’ll give you…Mississippi (let’s say). All the white folks are gonna have to clear out. ONce they’re gone bring all your black folks and have your Nation of Islam right here. Or, wait, maybe we’ll give you North Dakota…never mind, NOI, you’re going to get PLENTY of land, only for black folks. So start gathering them up!”

      Let’s just say this was going to happen. How would the NOI decide WHO is black? Because there are NO pure-blooded African Americans. Every black American has white in them!

      See, this is the kind of stuff I think about sometimes to get my mind off my problems 🙂

      Reply

        • Wynski, are you saying that it’s “predictable” that blacks will fail on their own? And, you might want to read the history of Liberia, it’s not at all an applicable example for a variety of reasons.

          Perhaps more relevant is that there are a number of majority black counties in the Deep South, that the NOI could use as an experiment to test and prove their ideas if they wanted to. In fact, in the later stages of the original NOI that Farrakhan’s current group is sort of schism of, they set up communities in the Deep South, but those never really took hold and their remnants are dying out.

          The NOI is actually so weak as to be virtually nonexistent in the South; it’s a phenomenon of immigrants to the industrial North, and there’s almost no interest in it, among their own people in the areas that they imagine taking over. But like Scientology, it’s a tiny group of borderline delusional people whose grandiose goals are disconnected from reality.

          Reply

          • AnonyMaker , I didn’t TRY to say what you wrote. I DID write exactly what I wrote. Study the English language for a while then reread it.

            Reply

            • Wynski, you made general references to “done that,” “predictable results,” and “it is called Liberia” in terribly imprecise language that would be flunked by any English teacher or history professor.

              Just what do you mean, then? What has been done, and what is predictable, about Liberia?

              Reply

              • Anony, keep going. Learn your basic world history from the last 500 or so years. Sub-Saharan history for the last 1,000.

                You’ll understand eventually. I charge to teach what one should already know as an adult. If you are a child just continue with your general education.

      • Add to that Biracial children…one parent Caucasian…the other parent African American/Black…WHERE in that spectrum will they be “placed”…OR do THEY get to decide for themselves what they want to be?

        After all, there are millions of biracial people, is the NOI accepting them as black or white & just WHO gets to judge if those same people are “more black or more white”???

        Unless you are 100% of ANY race…but then HOW do you know this is accurate…do one of those on line “tests” so you can get feedback on where you fall racially? I am sure MANY of us would be shocked to see where our “roots” came from.

        Then again, IF what you’ve noted is clearly their statement as in “Nation of Islam wants reparations for Blacks and for Blacks to have their own country and nation, separate from Whites”………………..

        just WHERE does the “NOI” want to place it’s “blacks only” group….do they want to return to their “homeland”…i.e. the “wilds of Africa”…….living out in undeveloped land with no houses, apartments…i.e. living in a grass or mud hut. Then there would also be no grocery stores…they’d have to go hunting…., no convenience stores, no automobiles, trains, buses, no fancy upscale clothing stores…???

        I highly doubt many of those NOI members would be willing to give up what they have living n the USA to return to the “motherland” to live how their ancestors lived….& then build up “their OWN NOI COMPOUND IN THE WILDS OF AFRICA…where according to the latest news reports FOOD is scarce in SOUTH AFRICA right now….farmers can’t keep their farms going or their families and livestock fed.

        “Better to keep one’s mouth shut & be thought a fool…then to open your mouth & prove it”

        Reply

        • All true, Balletlady. There would have to be a certain shade of dark – or pale – which would serve as the determining factor for whether a person was “white” or “black”.

          Reply

          • What are trying to do is to SEGRATE themselves….sadly….Rosa Parks and Dr. Martin Luther King FOUGHT For EQUALITY….now they want to set things back decades.

            What gives the NOI the RIGHT to talk about such nonsense….if NOI wants to separate themselves from “white society” & society as a whole…..let they BUY their own Island somewhere and go for it.

            As for myself and my friends of color….we all will be glad to see NOI go elsewhere….of course giving up all their RIGHT TO THE USA BENEFITS they now receive. since they don’t want to be “part of us”.

            Reply

              • I hear you and agree with you on everything you said, Balletlady. Indeed, MLK would be turning in his grave at the segregationist goals and purposes of the NOI. So wrong, so unrealistic, unworkable and downright stupid. Personally, as an organization I think of the Nation of Islam as the (thankfully tiny) African American equivalent of the proudly ignorant, stupid, racist Blood and Soil crowd – that thankfully tiny group of Caucasian Americans who have, unfortunately, been given a “voice” of late.

        • Aqua, none of it makes sense. Neither the founder nor the current leader of the NOI are even African American – Muhammad was South Asian-Anglo, and Farrakhan is Afro-Caribbean and has said himself that he believes his father was Jewish!

          Their plans are similarly unrealistic though, like Scientology, it’s at least possible to see how in mid-century America they might have made a sort of sense to some people.

          Reply

          • Keep in mind people feel the need to “fit in”….if they feel accepted and welcomed whereas others have rejected them, they will jump on the band wagon full steam ahead.

            Reply

          • All true, PM and BL! Poverty is not the fundamental issue! No matter their skin color or nationality, people with very low self esteem, who believe they don’t matter, who believe they have nothing to contribute are SO vulnerable. Their emotions are so easily manipulated by demagogues who know exactly what buttons to press.

            Reply

            • Amen Aqua….people feel the need to “belong”…if others turn their backs on them, they will seek the company of others who will welcome them with open arms, trying to convince them that they NEED this need organization/group & how they will be so welcomed to join….for a PRICE.

              Even if it means this “new group member” has to CHANGE their own personal point of view….to be ACCEPTED into the core group..sometimes is enough.

              Reply

              • Right! Evangelical Christians scour the prisoners for new converts. Did you experience a lull in your life so to liven things up you murdered in cold blood a classroom full of kids at your old high school? Angry with your husband so you bundled your little children into the car and drowned them? NO PROBLEM. The Born Agains will accept you.

                “Hi there, Degraded One! Come with us! Be part of our family! Doesn’t matter what you did to anybody. Jesus loves you and already died for you so don’t you fret none! Just swear that Jesus is your Savior, and you won’t even have to promise not to do anything like that again! You can keep right on being the total fucking creep that you are! Just have your epiphany and swear that Jesus is your SaVior and all will be well. In fact, you’ll get thru them Pearly Gates, guaranteed, while the ones who don’t believe and do good works won’t! Yep, we got it all fixed up for ‘ya. Feel better now? ”

                Its no wonder the jails are full of Born Again Christians.

                And, yes, I’m ranting because this “Jesus died for our sins” crap drives me nuts! Nobody can absolve anyone from sin! Personal responsibility is what cleans the slate! Try telling that to my relatives though. Thank God they live far from me in the Deep South. Thank you, God and thank you, Jesus!

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