Mike Rinder's Blog

Something Can Be Done About It

Thursday Funnies

By 51 Comments

 

The new look

Crossed arms are so 2019.

Holding an empty 3 ring binder is the new thing.

Sure says “determined” to me?

 

Here today, gone tomorrow

Just look at ANY of the ideal orgs that have opened and see how many of the people they touted beforehand are there today.

Most of these people will never actually start, they just agree to sign up to be left alone for a while.

 

Big Ben!

That’s a lot of “secular” stuff for an organization that claims to bring more people onto the Bridge than anyone else on earth…

 

The Year of Bahamas Relief….

Seriously?

They’re going to pat themselves on the back. And ask for more money.

 

Good cash moneyyyyy

She thinks she will be gone for 2 weeks. How naive.

Why would someone have to pay — isn’t the staff pay good enough?

Don’t they have any supervisors in Training in Valley Org?

Is she THE sup in the largest Class V ideal org on earth?

 

What are Renaissance Speakers?

Do they tell Christmas Stories?

Like there was no Christ?

The man on the cross is in the R6 bank?

 

It’s not just Christmas we steal…

Real religions have their OWN holidays.

 

Way to Happiness…

Photography workshop?

How soon before the dance lessons?

 

Damning with faint praise…

This is the best “success story” you could muster?

It was the same old stuff, but I pretended it was new to be able to “complete”

 

A “colors” tea party

That’s even better than dance lessons.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. This is “FLAG”…

 

What you will learn

Don’t bring up the subject at all unless you want to be bombarded with “entheta”

 

Photography and now gardening

They seem to be embarrassed to mention scientology

 

Rejoice. Revive. Renew.

Rehash.

 

It’s a disco inferno

And “family friendly”??

 

We need some ceiling lights

Our last bulbs blew and we don’t have any money to get more…

 

Some real insight here…

I wonder if Sophia thinks this is profound?

 

With professional speaker

Unlike our other offerings, which are totally amateur

 

They already HAD this event

Now they are wanting people to show up to watch it again…

They’ve got waffles, a karaoke bar in ASHO and DJ’s in AOLA.

And don’t forget the regges. LOTS of regges.

 

They already had the event too…

 

So too the Valley People

So they got a “world-renowned” singer to attract people. She comes as a package with Rafferty who is doing the postulates seminar. BOGO.

 

It’s “postulates season”

And these people will teach you how to make ones that really stick.

They will also grow you new limbs, cure your cancer, restore hair to the bald and sight to the blind.

Just bring your checkbook.

 

This guy has the Flag tech of postulates

These ones must be even betterrer

 

Oh, everyone is in on the postulates gig

WISE

OT Committee

Narconon

Applied Scholastics

WTH

CCHR

Drug Free World

Veterans

Artists for a Better World

Hell, they might even get some trolls and fairies to participate.

 

Kiddie Corner of Shame

Yikes

 

What is this?

WTH in disguise?

Or an even watered down version of WTH because that is now associated with scientology?

And strong too…

 

More kiddie porn

 

Don’t get too excited

It’s already decided the winner is going to be AOSH Africa because that is the one anointed by the Pope this year.

 

Definitely don’t mention scientology…

It’s all about the coffee, face painting and ice-skating.

 

 

Comments

  1. It’s OFFICIAL! scn has NO SHAME. They’ll do ANYTHING to TRY to bring in the dough.

    Reply

    • “Those staff members don’t seem very extroverted.”

      It’s tough to be extroverted with your nose firmly held to the grindstone and your every action critically overseen by evaluative and invalidative seniors. Even in the photoshoot, they were probably told they weren’t smiling hard enough, which will introvert anyone.

      Reply

  4. “The man on the cross is in the R6 Bank?”

    LOL!

    Mike, you’re clever and funny.

    Thanks for giving us the laughs along with the facts 🙂

    Reply

    • Aqua, El Con Tubbard DID say that the man on the cross was just a piece of R6. I’ve seen it quoted a couple of times “recently”, but can’t recall when/where and wouldn’t look because I don’t really care. KSW was abandoned by scn about 30 years ago, so I’m certainly not gonna worry about a little verbal ‘tech’.

      Reply

      • jere, thank you, and yes I believe you. I’m not OT anything but I too have read this LRH datum about JC several times from different people on this blog and elsewhere. I just thought the way Mike used it to poke fun at the cult’s phony Christmas promo was hilarious 🙂

        Reply

  5. New Year’s Eve Party – ‘Biggest, On-Purpose & “Safest”? Event of the year. Please explain, “Safest” . . . . (Hint . . . . . If $ is involved, you couldn’t be in Graver Danger!)

    Reply

    • Beylinda:
      “New Year’s Eve Party – ‘Biggest, On-Purpose & “Safest”? Event of the year. ”
      “Please explain, “Safest” . . . . ”

      Safest or the REGGES, of course. After a few drinks, the marks are less likely to actually HIT the reg when they get frustrated and swing at them.

      Reply

  6. What is it with this Postulates thing? Tampa Ideal Org is hosting the below on January 18 and 19 — for $200 at the door:

    THE MOST REQUESTED EVENT IS BACK!

    Gerhard Schwandt presents LRH data on Postulates!

    What is a postulate?

    How do they function?

    What kinds of postulates are there and how do you make a postulate that really works?

    How can you undo unwanted postulates?

    ATTEND THIS WORKSHOP TO RID YOURSELF OF THE USUAL MEST UNIVERSE HABITS AND ROUTINES AND START OPERATING AS OT RIGHT NOW!

    Tickets are a donation of $175 in advance or $200 at the door!

    SPECIAL GROUP DISCOUNTS AVAILABLE

    Call 813-872-0722 and reserve your ticket today!

    Or email [email protected]

    Reply

  7. Speaking of the non-volunteers from scientology, we just got back from taking another truckload of water and supplies to the relief site from Typhoon Ursula in the Philippines. Again we were allowed only so far before being unloaded by disaster relief personnel. Looking at the board of approved relief organizations allowed in didn’t show the”yellow shirts again. They are being really hard on letting people near the damage. Will be making another truck run Monday, do will check the sheets and area again.

    Reply

  8. Pac Base gingerbread house.
    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA( oh, I can’t stop!)HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! (whew!)
    There. That did it.
    Big Blue is now Big Brown.

    Reply

  10. No wonder they’re going heavy on postulates, a diet full of rice and beans and bs will cause a major flare up of sticky postulaitis.

    On a side note: Can’t wait to see how many of the 200,000 V.M.’s show up here in Australia to give massages have a few photos taken then piss off again. The last time they jumped into any action was 2009 to “help” in the floods of Queensland.

    If there is 3,000,000 – 100,000,000 $camologists worldwide (numbers change due to how sober Der Dwarfendweeber is at time of publication) how come they can only pull together 200,000 Vermin Mice?

    Reply

    • A useful and hopefully very helpful response: hand them an Aftermath Foundation card that has info to help them get out of the cult. Check out the website to get some of the cards.

      Reply

  11. I have to walk by these Scientology Whack Job body routers who try hustle me *everyday* on my way to lunch during my lunch break downtown and I’m tempted to start carrying a cattle prod so I can zap sparks in the air and tell them to GET BACK. What’s wrong with these people? Is this what brainwashing does to people?

    Reply

    • More effective than a cattle prod are a few simple questions: “Where is Shelly?”. “Have you Watched Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath?” or the ultimate “I am a psychiatrist, would you like me to help you get out of this cult?”

      Reply

      • Someday, I’m going to tell a body router that they’re in a cult. Problem is, there aren’t many body routers these days!

        Reply

      • LOL! Perfect. Here’s another to add to Mike’s list of what to say to the Invasion of the Body Routers: “Sure! Let’s talk about Xenu and what happened 75 million years ago! I just read all about OT3 on the internet, let’s talk!”

        Reply

  12. When will the yellow shirts show up for a photo op in Australia near the fires? Followed by a self-congratulatory dinner, no doubt?

    Reply

    • The largest private relief force on earth is awfully invisible… they have an AO, an ideal org and a CLO in Sydney.

      Reply

      • Scientology Australia has been a Mickey-Mouse operation for decades. They probably can’t confront the magnitude of the bushfires.

        Reply

  13. They’re still doing 6 month checks? I thought that was an arbitrary that was cancelled. Well I guess they just can’t trust those OT 7’s. So, stop everything, put your life on hold, and go to flag for regging, overpriced…everything, and sec checking.
    It’s good to be at the top of the bridge.

    Reply

  14. Interesting quote from Hubbard regarding introversion. He made damn sure that the only time it was acceptable to introvert was when you were auditing. Which meant he and his organization raked in the cash. The ultimate scam artist.🤑

    Reply

  15. Does Hanna li sing ‘The World is a Ghetto’? Or ‘Ball of Confusion’? I love those songs. They’re about human rights, aren’t they? Why don’t human rights apply to members of the CO$ or staff or the Sea Org? Oh, they signed away those rights when they joined up. What about those 12 year olds that ‘signed up’?

    The themes of all of these parties are all over the place. Someone is using the shotgun method of bring crowds in. I bet none of the participants are allowed to leave with out taking a survey about the nights ‘fun’. And they’ll have to show an empty wallet too.

    Reply

    • Empty binder? Well … how about that? It really is empty!

      Gosh Darn Exclamation point! They jest keep getting dumber and dumber and dumber!

      How low will they go? How low can they go?

      Reply

  17. “The elite staff of…”

    Isn’t “elite” a dirty word nowadays?

    “Elites” live in their PC bubble world and are completely out of touch with “real” , “hard-working” people, don’t you know.

    These cult promo writers should be Crammed in Qual.

    Yo Cult:
    Ditch the “elite” modifier on ALL staff recruitment promo and instead call the staff “honest”, “real” and “hard-working”.
    Get with it, Scientology!

    Get with it, Scientology!

    Reply

  18. I laughed out loud and nearly spewed coffee at the pic of the SO guy holding the empty binder with his other fist clenched into a fist. Is this the new power pose? Crossed hands are so last decade now.

    Reply

  19. The Supervisor at Valle Org asking for help to be replaced as a Sup. while she goes to Flag is going to end in trouble sooner or later.

    If she leaves without coverage, she will get a KR sent to Flag and this means? Yes, more sec checking!
    If she does not arrive on time for her 6 months check, well? Yes…more sec checking as it was her fault for not being cause over matter, energy, space and time. She may even be sent back to redo Life Repair.

    Oh, but the registrar will be making good stats, so, no worries…RTC will be happy.

    Reply

  20. I can’t razz them for having Christmas, Valentines, NYs, Easter, 4th of July, Halloween celebrations.

    IMHO Christians celebrate Christmas for their religious reasons, having nothing to do with Christmas trees, Santa, presents, and the myriad of accompanying traditions, same with Easter.

    I’ve celebrated these holidays since childhood, and my parents openly mocked all religion.

    I never considered the holidays as belonging only to Christianity. Us infidels stole it and shaped it for ourselves.

    We celebrated it at schools, were given “Christmas break”, the libraries, stores, offices, and city streets explode with Christmas decorations, celebration, … television, radio, …

    Christmas is Everywhere… and I grew up feeling sorry for the kids who had to waste it in boring church talking about some stupid baby jesus nonsense.

    Christians may celebrate the “true Christmas” or something , and that’s totally cool.

    I’m guessing there are more non-christians celebrating infidel Christmas (trees, presents, food & family) than the Christians doing their things.

    ..
    The cult does have its own celebrations, Hubbard’s birthday, DMSMH’s May 9th event, Auditor’s Day….

    But they don’t really celebrate ANY holiday.

    Holidays connote time off post, and production…. IS THE BASIS OF MORAL!

    hahaha!!

    Reply

      • Mike, here’s the thing. If I went to that Valley Org Hannukah party and they served cheeseburgers, I’d laugh and then walk out. Remember, if it ain’t kosher, it ain’t hanukkah.
        Maybe no one felt like applying study tech and clearing the word ‘latke’.
        Oh, and who is going to word clear ‘Baruch atah adonai elohenu melech haolam”?
        Maybe the Dror Center can help here.

        Reply

      • No, the small town and general rural area where I was raised in the 60’s had zero visible Jewish presence. It still has very little, lip service. Almost no diversity, especially compared with areas like the Northeast. We had one black kid in school. That’s it. Twelve years of school. One black family, one Asian family and a few Native Americans.

        I joined the cult as a teenager and moved away.

        And for me, Christmas is secular and it appears to me to be commonly celebrated in a secular fashion.

        I don’t miss having to CSW off for it.

        Reply

    • “I never considered the holidays as belonging only to Christianity. Us infidels stole it and shaped it for ourselves.” ACTUALLY Rip you got it 180 degrees wrong. The church shaped their Holy Days into a format that you infidels would like and SUCKED you into their church. That you didn’t know that shows how good a job of brainwashing the Early Catholics Church did…

      Reply

  21. Giggling away here. Why wouldn’t they put some paper in the 3-ring binder? The whole project of taking a photo is for appearance’ sake. What kind of appearance do they think they create by having someone hold an empty binder with an intense expression? I’ll tell you: this person is acting. In particular, he’s acting very serious about something completely empty.

    Reply

    • Yes, but even if the binder was chock-full of important looking papers, it would still be (in reality) EMPTY!

      Reply

  22. A New Year wish is Candid Camera saying “Smile you’re in Candid Camera” making scientologists to drop their forward going.

    Reply

  23. The Hubbard “data” on introversion and extroversion is total bullshit. It’s presented as if there is something wrong with being introverted and extroversion is the only way to be.

    There is nothing inherently wrong with being an introvert or an extrovert. It’s just the way that some people are with lots of shades of gray between the two. As an introvert, I have found myself always trying to be more extroverted. I finally found some peace when I was able to accept myself for who I am rather than always trying to change it. That self acceptance cost me nothing. scientology ‘auditing’ certainly did not help with any of these struggles by trying to get me to be more extroverted and it cost me a shit-ton of money and a loss of dignity. I got the dignity back but the money is long gone.

    Reply

  24. What you will Learn!

    How to handle misinformation about Scamatology.

    1) Get a shovel.

    2) Dig a deep hole.

    3) Stick your head in the hole.

    4) Cover up your head with the sand you removed to dig the hole.

    5) In other words: Bury your head in the sand and pay no attention to anything anyone says about The Scam – except of course for those criminals who demand all your money.

    Whadda Scam!

    Reply

    • It actually IS the safest because the LAPD are always there. If you don’t believe me, just ask Angry Gay Pope or Nasty Nathanial. Cops are always running them off LRH Way with a little help from Odo Huber and Parker Osmon.

      Reply

  26. The How to Make Good Choices booklet uses the 21 values found in The Way to Happiness as a basis. The booklets are produced by Happiness House. Happiness House was founded by Scientologist Nancy Cartwright. See:

    https://happyhouse.org/about/

    I recently reported that How to Make Good Choices booklets are being used by Nation of Islam Muhammad Mosque 35 in Wilmington, Delaware. See:

    https://exscn2.net/threads/members-of-the-nation-of-islam-are-practicing-the-religion-of-scientology.55/post-11514

    I’ll also note that Nation of Islam Sister Sherrice Muhammad has her own Way To Happiness booklet.

    Reply

    • Like Rizza Islam and the woman whose name I forget made good choices. They chose to rip off Medi-Cal (Medicaide everywhere else) to the tune of millions. They are facing serious jail time for that. That was a good choice, right?

      Reply

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