This article is being written specifically for those of you who are still “in” Scientology, still actively “on lines” or around in the orgs (although, of course, I want everyone to read it).
I know there are many of you “still ins” who read this blog, probably many more than any of you actually realize. I have been exactly where you are right now. And I wanted to share some things that helped me get to a much better place across all my dynamics.
There come points in everyone’s life where they are forced to face a hard truth. They know that they cannot continue to turn a blind eye or be reasonable. They know that the time has come to make a decision. In light of current events with RCS (Radical Corporate Scientology), that time is now.
I have been involved with Scientology for a very long time. I can tell you that I am highly tech and admin trained and I have had a lot of auditing. Involved for many years, I went from public to Class V org staff to Sea Org and I spent a good amount of time in different echelons and on different posts. Being a voracious reader, I studied almost everything from LRH I could get my hands on.
Like many of you, I’ve seen plenty of outnesses in my years. I want to expand on this a little to give context to where I’m coming from and hopefully, relate to some of what you have seen too.
The IRS victory of 1993 seemed to be a watershed moment. The inevitable expansion of Scientology seemed assured. Yet three years later, it had not happened. Then the original “Golden Age of Tech” in 1996, which assured us all that perfect auditors were now all but guaranteed, and more swiftly than ever before. We would take the planet this lifetime! Yet another three years passed and no one could seem to get past the Metering Course. Then came Arbitraries Removed and the floodgates to OT opened up wide. We weren’t making any auditors yet, but look at those people rocketing up to OT!
When the tragedy of September 11, 2001 happened, COB’s response was to write The Wake-Up Call, an issue which at once invalidated and implored all Scientologists to get them to “do more”. I was in the Sea Org by this time and thought that surely this would handle the reasonable attitude of all those dilettante public Scientologists. Now we would see some real expansion! Again, disappointment continued to frustrate me.
Then in 2003 came the first rumblings of what became the Ideal Org program. Then The Basics. These were pushed harder than all the earlier programs combined. Yet the result was that the stats were now really going down! The only stats that anyone seemed to care about anymore were all related to donations and those were pounded harder than ever before: Donations for Ideal Org buildings, for IAS, LRH Books into Libraries, Planetary Dissemination, etc etc. No one seemed to care anymore if orgs made any money selling services, despite LRH specifically stating in policy that the only reasons orgs exist is to sell and deliver materials and service to the public and get in public to sell and deliver to. All of that took a back seat to getting in more money no matter what it took to get those money stats up.
So now in 2013 we have the Big Solution that is supposed to resolve all of this. The Golden Age of Tech Phase II and the long-awaited release of Super Power. And the result of these new programs? A lot of PR and hype and no tangible result. Bridge progress is now measured in how many times you can re-do services, not actually make motion UP The Bridge to achieve a truly higher spiritual state.
Through all of the years that these things were going on, I watched the dismantling of Church management with creeping alarm, wondering what was going on but feeling powerless to do anything about it. The President of the Church of Scientology, Heber Jentsch, just disappeared. Then so did the other Int Management executives: ED Int, Snr C/S Int, WDC members, Int Management Exec Committee members. Their names didn’t appear on issues anymore, just their post titles. Then there were no new issues or programs being released by any of them. Just endless orders and directions and programs directly from RTC. Yet every single issue about RTC specifically states it is not a management body and is not involved in the day-to-day operations of the Churches worldwide.
I’m only recounting all of this to tell you what I have seen with my own eyes. I didn’t watch all of this from afar. I didn’t “hear about” this. I was immersed right in the middle of it. Getting these programs done was all I worked on for many years. And it became more and more obvious with each passing year that the Church was going farther and farther off-purpose, yet David Miscavige kept grandly announcing at every new event how much expansion there was, how popular Dianetics and Scientology were, how we were so close to taking this planet. Stats at events didn’t have any actual number attached to them, but they sure all were going up!
To those out there who have seen any of this, who have some idea of what I’m talking about, I know it is not an easy confront but it is the right thing to do. You know in your heart of hearts that the Church of Scientology no longer stands for what it says in its very own Creed. This is not the fault of the rank-and-file Scientologists. They are most of them very good people. But they are followers. The leaders of RCS have been operating a squirrel group for quite some time and no one actually noticed when it happened. But its so blatantly obvious now, that you have seen it and you know you need to do something about it, even if only for yourself.
But what do you do?
You don’t have to march right into the org and stand before an injust Comm Ev whose members have already determined your guilt before you even opened your mouth. You don’t have to write long KRs that will be used only as evidence against you of your “disaffection”. You don’t have to cooperate with the corrupt Sea Org or RCS at all, in fact. Their justice system, while it sounds swell on paper, is being used only as window dressing these days.
Instead, just contact friends and family members and and say what’s on your mind. Be honest with yourself. Let others know. And don’t be afraid to say what you think. You may be quite surprised at the responses or reactions you get back. Because I can tell you this: you are NOT the only one who is thinking about this and who wants to get out before it’s too late. There are cases of family members under the same roof who lived with each other for years without knowing that the other desperately wanted to get out of RCS but was afraid to say anything for fear of disconnection.
If you are having doubts right now and you don’t know what to do, then the thing to do is to find out more information. The Church is not going to give you that information. Believe me, I tried to get it myself and received nothing but cold, haughty stares and invalidative refutations that the only reason I was even asking these questions was because of all my overts. Look at what happened with other “declared SPs” who have now spoken out. They ran into the exact same thing when they were upfront and honest with the Church’s representatives.
No one in RCS feels that they owe you any kind of explanation or answers for your questions when it comes to finding out what is really going on. So go on-line and look for yourself. One or two or three natterers do not the truth make. But when you find out that there are thousands – yes, thousands – who have spoken out against the Church, you will quickly see that it is not a “handful of bitter apostates on the fringe of the internet.” Not even close. And their stories are not all lies and natter and disaffection. There is truth out there, waiting for you to find it.
I hope you do so and may you never be the same again.